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View Full Version : DLR "fans" who obsess/harass/stalk



David Wolf
10-09-2011, 03:35 AM
I was reminded today of Dave's describing in his book Crazy From The Heat how some weirdo female whom he described as basically looking "like a bag lady" was haunting him for quite some time, and another time a few years back when Dave caught someone prowling around on his property (and fortunately he always keeps his shotgun handy :thumb: ). I must admit, I have an idea how he must have felt as I myself got harassed/stalked by a couple of creeps myself as I'm a published artist, but that's another story.

But seriously, it makes me wonder: if somebody claims to *really* like/admire/etc somebody, how can they not see that the best thing they can do is respect that individual's privacy? If you really like someone like Dave, wouldn't you want to make them happy by giving them their personal space, especially when that's so hard to come by for a public figure?

I mean, yeah, I know, such people are obviously nuts/shit/selfish for whatever reason, but even so, you'd think even a child would understand that "stalker" equals "uninvited stranger". I have to confess too, it never used to cross my mind that Dave had ever dealt with junk like that until he talked about it in his interviews and I read his book.

And I also think Dave's got the exact right idea for characteristically keeping a shotgun handy just in case. ;)

ZahZoo
10-09-2011, 09:43 AM
Most people get the boundaries... but when you consider any pop figure out there... people connect at various levels. Then they collect images, video, audio, collectibles, etc and surround themselves with these pop figures in every facet of their lives.

They keep these things in their bedrooms, living rooms, bathrooms, cars, boats, out houses, etc... always surrounded and very much a part of their daily lives. Their most personal parts of their lives as well as public. Sooner or later they feel so connected that the pop figure is literally a part of the fabric of their life. From there... making the jump to creepy stalker isn't much more than a blink of an eye...

Consider many around here... aren't we all a bit of an uninvited stranger... some stranger than others...

clarathecarrot
10-09-2011, 10:35 AM
I never felt so stupid as in my 20's when, I actually had been with many girls,.... name them, situation,... I had done it by then, but I still was foolish enough to think writing a Playboy Model, is actually something one should do...I didn't write anything creepy, but I still feel like a creep.

We as fans or admirer's or I enjoy your whattever you do's sometimes feel like you attention is a sign of friendship not just entertainment and business.

I describe it like this...

That is why every lonely dude is interested in the bartender babe why because she is the only girl in the joint that talks to you.

mohican
10-09-2011, 01:42 PM
"... it makes me wonder: if somebody claims to *really* like/admire/etc somebody, how can they not see that the best thing they can do is respect that individual's privacy? If you really like someone like Dave, wouldn't you want to make them happy by giving them their personal space, especially when that's so hard to come by for a public figure?"

That would be the behavior of a normal, reasonable person. I admit some might think it's odd of me being on this site but I'm not going to Pasadena and hang outside Dave's house. If I see him eating at a restaurant, I would leave him alone. I've come across crazies (pathological liars and bi-polars) and they are people that live in a parallel world as the rest of us. There is no getting through to them. Stalkers fit in this category. Met this guy at a party that told everyone Jared Leto and his band stole his songs. Said he hung out with Leto and the band, and they took his materials and kicked him out. I hardly knew of Leto, so I didn't question his story and went along listening. Then the guy couldn't STFU and talked about other celebs he knew. It became apparent he was a pathological liar. The disturbing part was that he really believed what came out of his mouth. He was living in that fantasy world.

Terry
10-09-2011, 03:33 PM
Getting older has slowly made me realize that as talented as icons from various fields are, they're still just people.

If one looks past the mythology and fantasy perpetuated by the media and gobbled up by the public, celebrities are subject to the same frailties everyone else is. In some ways, celebrities live in a cocoon and aren't even really fully formed adults regardless of their age. Talent can make that aspect of someone's output and life special, but it doesn't mean everything about someone is therefore great.

I mean, take Eddie Van Halen. Spectacular rock guitar player. Also an alcoholic, and a bit childish. Look at the incredible juggernaut CVH was in 1984. A year later it all came to an end over ego and control issues, and that same childish behavior kept the band from reuniting for decades. Not a lot to applaud there.

It'd be interesting to meet Roth, I suppose, but there would probably be along the lines of the cold slap in the face I got when I saw Steven Tyler in an airport a decade ago. The guy was stumbling around the terminal in snakeskin boots and leather pants, standing in line at a bagel counter, placing his order like anyone else, pulling wad of cash out of his pocket and totally confused as to what a bagel cost. The counter clerk had to actually reach over and pluck a bill out of the wad of cash Tyler held in his hands, then one of Tyler's bodyguards/minders had to escort Tyler back to the proper gate since Tyler seemingly had no idea where he was. Now, some people might think that kind of totally out of it behavior was "so rock and roll". To me, it was a bit pathetic to see.

Look at how fucked up Walter Payton was. Great in the spotlight doesn't always translate into stellar behind the scenes. Don't get me wrong; the money would be nice, but I wouldn't want to intrude on someone else's privacy.

The thing of it is there are a lot of weak-minded fools out there who buy into the myths, hype and fantasies. Look at Mark David Chapman. Stable people who have a sense of reality, perspective and a belief in themselves don't worship celebrities...or at least don't elevate them onto some God-like pedestal simply because they can play a guitar well, throw a ball fast, star in an action movie or win an election.

Unchainme
10-09-2011, 05:21 PM
meeting a celebrity is kind of a weird thing depending on the situation.

a weekend a go, my little bro. and I got to talk with the Roger Penske, who happened to be staying at the same hotel as us, along with team penske and panther racing, a guy who you'd think was some evil villain in indy car. Could not have been a nicer dude. Took time to talk to us and even signed something for my little bro.

Bernie Kosar I met at an Arena League game acted more like my dad would with clients, having a joke with some of the owners and seemed like a nice enough dude.

The weirdest was meeting hacksaw jim dugan and sgt. slaughter. Both were really quite, reserved and pretty cool guys. Completely different than what they were on stage. I've gotta hand to those in the WWE though, from everything I've seen they treat their fans very nicely and are always willing to take pics and autos.

Depends on the guy. Believe me your image can be enhanced after just chance meeting a famous guy.

Hardrock69
10-09-2011, 10:43 PM
I have usually had a decent time of it when hanging with celebs. Of course 99% of the celebs I have met have been rock musicians. Come to think of it, I have almost not had any bad experiences. Sometimes it is simply saying "Hey how's it going?" like happened with Kiss in 1977...and a couple of them said "Ok!" and walked on to their limo (hell it was 20 degrees outside). But others have taken some time and had a chat.

Hmm...I did have one experience not so great...Buck Dharma of BOC.....they were actually playing a club gig in Wichita, KS in the mid-90s. I had seen them the year before where they played a really kickass new song called "I'm Still Burning". I happened to get to the club as they were finishing up their sound check. Asked him if they were planning on playing that song that evening. He gave a sort of non-commital "yeah". Then I asked him if it were ever going to be released on a CD as I thought it was a really kickass song, but they had not yet put it on an album. He said "I don't know". His demeanor at the time was one of irritation.

But then, how the hell can I know what was going on in his world at the time, only to have some tall idiot walk up and ask him a couple of questions? He may have been having a really bad day or whatever and just did not want to be bothered, lol.

I always err on the side of conservatism. I don't wanna be a gurm on someone. Generally if you are relaxed and friendly, they will be too.

Hardrock69
10-09-2011, 11:03 PM
By the way, here is the song I was tripping on. It was released soon after I met Buck. The guitar riff and the double-kicks really blew my mind.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=erCCRu8-vkw

Hardrock69
10-09-2011, 11:04 PM
Oops...dupe post....crummy dialup....

hambon4lif
10-09-2011, 11:43 PM
I was reminded today of Dave's describing in his book Crazy From The Heat how some weirdo female whom he described as basically looking "like a bag lady" was haunting him for quite some time.Yeah, I think her name was Katy. She was here for awhile 'til she got herself banned. :biggrin:

Anyway, I remember watching an old Bill Cosby interview where he said that "if you buy a ticket, the performer owes you a good show, but when they're offstage, you owe the performer good manners". That hits the nail right on the head as far as that goes. I've met many rockstars, pro athletes and celebrities, and for the most part, they've all been really cool.

There are some that I've become a fan of not necessarily because I dig whatever it is they do, but because of how cool they were as people.

Then there are some that I always dug and became a bigger fan of because they were just that fucking cool!
I'm a huge Cheap Trick fan, and where I live, I run into them often. Even though I realize they are people, something about standing in a supermarket parking lot having a conversation with Bun E. Carlos about each others cars still trips me the hell out.

It's all about giving the proper respect.

PETE'S BROTHER
10-10-2011, 11:37 AM
felt that way even with wolfie, just shake his hand, say hi, and listen to what he had to say.

Heater
10-13-2011, 08:46 AM
It seems that fans (derived from the word fanatic) over time build up a relationship with their heroes in their minds. They start to become fiercely protective of them, taking personally any negativity directed at them. Fantasies and ideations simmer below the surface, imagined meetings then becoming great friends are the most common. Statements such as, "if I know.... as well as I think", "it doesn't sound like anything.....would do", "you know what..... Would say about that". They see their hero as perfect, as an extension of themselves. The loyalty needs to be returned to them, instead of admitting how anonymous they really are in the scheme of things, the delusion continues.

hambon4lif
10-13-2011, 09:11 AM
Sounds really jaded to me.
Guess your encounter with Justin Beiber didn't go quite the way you had expected, or hoped...
...buck up, pork chop. He was probably just having a bad day. :thumb:

Mr Walker
10-13-2011, 10:32 AM
The weirdest was meeting hacksaw jim dugan and sgt. slaughter.

Sgt Slaughter was one of the nicest men I ever met in my life.

Heater
10-13-2011, 10:33 AM
Further compounded by defending their hero's honor on various Internet forums, fueled by the hope/belief that their hero reads their posts. This, the writer believes, will endear them more to their hero ensuring a longtime friendship after the inevitable meeting the worshiper KNOWS will happen.

hambon4lif
10-13-2011, 10:48 AM
Further compounded by defending their hero's honor on various Internet forums, fueled by the hope/belief that their hero reads their posts.Many of Roths fans know better. Roth, to this day, probably has no idea that this site even exists.

Alot of his fans, like myself, just have a good time making fun of your vacant, meaningless existence....

jhale667
10-13-2011, 11:52 AM
Many of Roths fans know better. Roth, to this day, probably has no idea that this site even exists.

Alot of his fans, like myself, just have a good time making fun of your vacant, meaningless existence....

Bleater shows up specifically for the abuse.

Let's not forget the SUPPOSED DLR fans who obsess/harass/stalk their fellow members on this site...FORD, DJ and I among others have all had our own "anti" fan clubs around here at one time or another...with mostly the same members...fucking weirdos!

Sensible Shoes
10-13-2011, 04:14 PM
Further compounded by defending their hero's honor on various Internet forums, fueled by the hope/belief that their hero reads their posts. This, the writer believes, will endear them more to their hero ensuring a longtime friendship after the inevitable meeting the worshiper KNOWS will happen.

Oh dear, this is me. I apologize.

hambon4lif
10-13-2011, 04:29 PM
Bleater shows up specifically for the abuse.I just find it odd that he'd be here talking shit today.
It's his hero's birthday, so I thought he'd be out celebrating by getting an "angry dragon" or a "pink sock".

gbranton
10-20-2011, 03:09 AM
I have usually had a decent time of it when hanging with celebs. Of course 99% of the celebs I have met have been rock musicians. Come to think of it, I have almost not had any bad experiences.

I always err on the side of conservatism. I don't wanna be a gurm on someone. Generally if you are relaxed and friendly, they will be too.


I remember watching an old Bill Cosby interview where he said that "if you buy a ticket, the performer owes you a good show, but when they're offstage, you owe the performer good manners".

It's all about giving the proper respect.

Agree with this 100%, if I have to fight my way up to someone, most times I'd just as soon not even bother. I have no desire to harass or bother anyone. I month or so ago I met George Lynch outside the House of Blues in New Orleans, he had time to spare because the roadies were still packing equipment and so me and a few others gave him some space and just shot the breeze with him and the next thing you know he's telling stories about former band members and roadies and talking about future projects with us just like a normal person. That's the way I like for it to go down, not waving a napkin in someone's face while they are trying to eat.


There are some that I've become a fan of not necessarily because I dig whatever it is they do, but because of how cool they were as people.

There are bands out there who I like even more after meeting them and seeing how cool they are with the fans. Telsa and Great White come to mind, both bands are ALWAYS VERY cool with the fans. When I saw GW a couple of months ago they were playing a local casino and 99 times out of 100 bands duck out the back and head to the bank to cash their checks, never to be seen again. As GW was going off stage a roadie comes out and tells everyone to stick around because the band was going to set up tables and come back out to sign, meet and pose for pictures. SO COOL.

I have also done a few paid meet and greets over the last couple of years and I think this is where you run into really obnoxious, over the top fans. People who do their damnedest to "out-fan" you with their every utterance and talk about the band like they live next door. I've gotten to the point where I keep to myself pretty much on these junkets because every asshole you speak to is their "biggest fan". Meeting people like this gives me some sympathy for the performers, it must really suck to put up with these people everywhere you go.