Sometimes things just suck

[Angel]

My brother, the epitome of healthy living, called me this morning. I knew it had to be something bad, he never calls...

Last Wednesday he was awoken at 4am by seizures. Scans show a large mass in his brain. They're taking biopsy's from three different areas of the mass today. If necessary, further surgery is scheduled for Friday.

It's at times like these that I regret living so far away from my family. They're all at the hospital in Victoria right now so I can't call them up to talk. It's at times like these I'm grateful for the Army. You guys are like family to me, we bitch at each other but we've got each other's backs.

Guess I just want to say if you see me making angry wild posts, please forgive me...I'm just lashing out at the world....

[mh5150]

God Bless .You and your families are im my prayers.

[vandeleur]

hun,you and yours are in our thoughts.

[PETE'S BROTHER]

hopin' for the best

[clarathecarrot]

Feel free to knee my nuts anytime.

Opinionated or not I still care about people and wish you and your family the best.

[DONNIEP]

So sorry to hear about this Angel...

[Momshell]

I am so sorry sister - and you are right - sometimes things really do suck. I went through something similar myself several years ago and it all turned out ok, despite lots of scary shit initially and my family being given incorrect and really bad news. I know seizures and masses on the brain are serious as hell, but it's not necessarily anything life-threatening. I hope the biopsies turn out ok and the surgery will be the worst of it. I don't pray but my thoughts are definitely with you and your family and I'll be hoping for the best for you.

[Nickdfresh]

Best wishes to you and your brother and I'm sorry to hear this.

[ashstralia]

sending positive thougts from oz. xo

[jhale667]

So sorry to hear this...best wishes to you and your bro. :(

[chefcraig]

Positive thoughts and prayers headed your way, sweetheart. All the best.

[katina]

I am so sorry to hear this Angel, I wish you and your brother the best

[Nitro Express]

We're always here for you Angel. Here's a big hug for you and I'll keep your brother in my prayers.

[Angel]

Thanks you guys. Momshell, thank you for reminding me about your experience. I have now decided that his outcome will be the same as yours!

Thankfully, no scare tactics from the doc's. They are removing the mass on Friday, and they're confident it's probably benign. Thank God his girlfriend was there. She had to perform CPR when he had the seizure.

Of course, I have final exams in 1.5 weeks. Seems like I always have major stress in my life during finals!!!

[Nitro Express]

My wife teaches CPR classes. Good thing she knew how to do CPR.

[Diamondjimi]

Hope everything works out for the best Angel.. ;)

[Dan]

All The Best To Your Brother And Family.

[Hardrock69]

Holy fuck, Angel!

So sorry to hear of this! I SERIOUSLY hope docs are able to fix him up!

I will put in a word to the Big Guy Upstairs for him!

[Blaze]

I opted to let it be. Peace. I hope you learn what you need to know. ~`~

[Light Em' Up!]

Angel, I'm so sorry about this difficult time that you are going through. We are all sending positive thoughts and vibes your way, and wish a speedy and healthy recovery for your brother.

[ZahZoo]

Here's hoping for a successful treatment and quick recovery!! Hang in there Angel!!

[Zempi]

Sorry to hear. Any medical condition can be really scary and a huge underlying full time stress on the person it happens to as well as the family. I am sure he will be ok. The good thing is at least they know why this happened to him and they can remove it...:) Sometimes they don't know why...

[Sensible Shoes]

Brain masses have to be really up there on the list of big scarys. Praying that he will come through this with flying colors.

[Angel]

And now the fun begins...it's malignant, they just can't agree on what type. So, it will be either surgery...and a possible trial treatment in the US, or radiation and chemo...

[katina]

Angel, I am so sorry to hear of this :(
I send positives thoughts and a BIG hug to you

[loucap81]

Wow, I'm so sorry to hear this. I'll say a prayer for you and your brother.

[Momshell]

And now the fun begins...it's malignant, they just can't agree on what type. So, it will be either surgery...and a possible trial treatment in the US, or radiation and chemo...

Shit - I'm really sorry. Just a bit of advice based on my personal experience - make sure he gets mulitple opinions. I was told by my first doctor that I needed chemo for a year even though mine was removed surgically and was not malignant. He also started giving me all sorts of life expectancies ("hopefully you'll be ok for another 10 years" - doesn't fly when you have a 1 year old child). I cried like crazy and then got 3 additional opinions - the other doctors all told me this guy was nuts and they never heard of such a thing and that I did not need chemo. I would definitely recommend Duke and Sloane-Kettering if he comes to the US. I'll continue to hope for the best for him and for you. I remember going online to the Duke brain tumor center website - they have some pretty inspirational stories there. Treatment has really come a long way.

[Angel]

One thing that's nice about here is that the specialists aren't in competition with each other. They are consulting with other specialists as part of their investigation.

The thing I hate is having to deal with the mortality of the situation.

[Nitro Express]

We have some good cancer centers down here. John Huntsman Sr. The father of the guy that ran for president says if it costs him his whole fortune to end cancer it's worth it. He started the Huntsman Cancer Institute at the University of Utah. There's another center in Houston, Texas and I believe a relative of David Lee Roth is a doctor there.

My sister came down with pancreatic cancer. Luckly her physician caught it early and got going on it. She's cancer free now and doing great.

[motherchicken]

My brother, the epitome of healthy living, called me this morning. I knew it had to be something bad, he never calls...

Last Wednesday he was awoken at 4am by seizures. Scans show a large mass in his brain. They're taking biopsy's from three different areas of the mass today. If necessary, further surgery is scheduled for Friday.

It's at times like these that I regret living so far away from my family. They're all at the hospital in Victoria right now so I can't call them up to talk. It's at times like these I'm grateful for the Army. You guys are like family to me, we bitch at each other but we've got each other's backs.

Guess I just want to say if you see me making angry wild posts, please forgive me...I'm just lashing out at the world....
Just wondering if you've ever heard of Cyberknife. A new procedure only available in a few places. I know someone who went through it. Out patient brain surgery utilizing concentrated radiation. It's something to look into if you haven't already.

[Angel]

He'll be investigating all options, I'm sure. Luckily for him, money isn't an issue, and he has connections in the medical field. He was the Director of Pathology at King Fahad hospital in Saudi Arabia for 7 years.

[loucap81]

Well I'm glad to hear he has the money to get the best treatment possible at least.

I sincerely can say that I feel like family on here too, especially those of you whom I've met in person, and those of you who were active on DDLR dating back--I can't believe it's been this long--a decade. And when I see stuff like this, it does affect me the same way as if it were one of my family members or friends from where I live. Hang in there Angel and keep us posted.

[Hardrock69]

Yeah Lou, you are right. I view this place as my online family as well. Close-knit community.

[LoungeMachine]

As we get older, we lose more members here, and have more issues like this in our families.....

But with all the trolling, bickering, purse fights, and bitchfests one thing is certain...

Anytime one of us is going through this, we ALL feel it.

:gulp:

Best to your family sweetheart. Keep us posted on his recovery.

[Zempi]

I just read your round 2 of news. I am really sorry to hear about your family Angel. I know he will be in the right hands to help figure this out. Keep us posted....Sending positivity in the meanwhile...

[TFM_Dale]

My brother, the epitome of healthy living, called me this morning. I knew it had to be something bad, he never calls...

Last Wednesday he was awoken at 4am by seizures. Scans show a large mass in his brain. They're taking biopsy's from three different areas of the mass today. If necessary, further surgery is scheduled for Friday.

It's at times like these that I regret living so far away from my family. They're all at the hospital in Victoria right now so I can't call them up to talk. It's at times like these I'm grateful for the Army. You guys are like family to me, we bitch at each other but we've got each other's backs.

Guess I just want to say if you see me making angry wild posts, please forgive me...I'm just lashing out at the world....

Never easy, especially when it is a sibling, our prayers go out to you and your family.

[BITEYOASS]

If your brother makes it, which he will. Then you can send an e-mail Glenn Beck suggesting that he go fuck himself. :bigwink:

[Angel]

Then you can send an e-mail Glenn Beck suggesting that he go fuck himself. :bigwink:

He can go fuck himself, cancer or no cancer ;).

[Nitro Express]

Yeah Lou, you are right. I view this place as my online family as well. Close-knit community.

Disfunctional as a real family too. I'm just glad there is no money to fight over.

[Nitro Express]

If your brother makes it, which he will. Then you can send an e-mail Glenn Beck suggesting that he go fuck himself. :bigwink:

Glenn would start crying.

[DONNIEP]

Disfunctional as a real family too. I'm just glad there is no money to fight over.

We'd kill each other if there was :biggrin:

[Angel]

We'd kill each other if there was :biggrin:

Damn, you mean I've been doing all this plotting for nothing?? ;)

[mh5150]

Like I said in my tweet . Hang in there KID. I just went thru this with my inlaws . Although the out come was not good it did bring family closer .
Your family is in my church bulletin for prayers.

[fraroc]

My deepest condolences to you and your family. I'll definetly send word to the powers that be.

I've been through a relative having cancer. My grandmother was diagnosed with lung cancer in 2000 due to years of smoking, she survived the disease, thank God. All I can say is that it's not easy and it's definetly not fun, but while your loved one is fighting their disease, you just gotta fight along with him...

[PETE'S BROTHER]

Disfunctional as a real family too. I'm just glad there is no money to fight over.

there was huge amounts of cash til conmee spent it all on whores and coke.....

[DONNIEP]

Damn, you mean I've been doing all this plotting for nothing?? ;)

Just keep smiling chick, just keep smiling :)

[Angel]

there was huge amounts of cash til conmee spent it all on whores and coke.....

He promised me a private lap dance from Ginger Lynn out of that cash....that bastard!!

[Light Em' Up!]

And now the fun begins...it's malignant, they just can't agree on what type. So, it will be either surgery...and a possible trial treatment in the US, or radiation and chemo...

Oh my gosh sister...just saw this post. I'm sending you tons of positive vibes, and I know everyone here at the Army is sending them to you and your brother too. Loves to you Angel....

[Angel]

Well, I'm a fucking mess right now...I freely admit it. They operated today. He has the most common and deadly form of brain cancer: glioblastoma multiforme.

This will be followed by chemo and radiation. The prognosis is not good. Median survival rate is 14 months. He's hoping to join a study group in Miami and make it 5 years. That's pretty much the maximum he'll have...and that's pushing it.

This is so unfair!!! We die from heart attacks in our family, not fucking brain cancer. He's never smoked, eats all the right things, and is a freaking long distance cyclist at 51. What good does the heart and body of a much younger man do you when the big "C" comes along and robs you of everything?!?!?

I am so pissed off at the fucking world right now!!!! I have a paper due tomorrow. Super strict prof, doesn't give extensions for any reason. Frankly, right now I don't fucking care!!!!!

[vh rides again]

Best thing to do is enjoy him while it's still possible.
Don't waste time being mad or sorry.

Best wishes !

[Sensible Shoes]

Angel did they remove it? And if so, will he have problems from the surgery itself? I remember reading about this type of brain tumor when I was told I had one. It turned out to be a cyst, thank Goodness, but the literature really delivers a punch.

[clarathecarrot]

Well, I'm a fucking mess right now...I freely admit it. They operated today. He has the most common and deadly form of brain cancer: glioblastoma multiforme.

This will be followed by chemo and radiation. The prognosis is not good. Median survival rate is 14 months. He's hoping to join a study group in Miami and make it 5 years. That's pretty much the maximum he'll have...and that's pushing it.

This is so unfair!!! We die from heart attacks in our family, not fucking brain cancer. He's never smoked, eats all the right things, and is a freaking long distance cyclist at 51. What good does the heart and body of a much younger man do you when the big "C" comes along and robs you of everything?!?!?

I am so pissed off at the fucking world right now!!!! I have a paper due tomorrow. Super strict prof, doesn't give extensions for any reason. Frankly, right now I don't fucking care!!!!!

Business first, getting involved in that paper may help you, and you know it is the right thing to do. You probably won't be sleeping, from worring anyway..?

But, if you want to e-mail him (prof) tonight and explain your position , I hope he understands, he should.

Best Wishes.

[Light Em' Up!]

Angel...I'm so sorry you guys are suffering. I will continue to send my thoughts to you and your family. Please let me know if there is anything I can do....

[Angel]

Best thing to do is enjoy him while it's still possible.
Don't waste time being mad or sorry.

Best wishes !

I wish I could. I live about a 1000 miles away from all my family. Under normal circumstances, it's great. I'm not around for any of the drama...now, not so much :(

[Angel]

Angel did they remove it? And if so, will he have problems from the surgery itself? I remember reading about this type of brain tumor when I was told I had one. It turned out to be a cyst, thank Goodness, but the literature really delivers a punch.

Yeah, they removed it. Don't know any details yet. He was in recovery when I called. His girlfriend was just running out the door to get back to the hospital.

Yeah, the literature knocks you for a loop, no doubt about it. But he's strong physically and mentally. There's always that odd one that beats all the odds...if anyone can beat it, he can.

As for the paper Clara, the email's already been sent. The paper is almost done, just couldn't focus on the last bit of it today. It's a Social Work class. I'm sure the faculty will be understanding. Sure not looking forward to studying for finals this week, but at least it will keep my mind off things...

[PETE'S BROTHER]

Well, I'm a fucking mess right now...I freely admit it. They operated today. He has the most common and deadly form of brain cancer: glioblastoma multiforme.

This will be followed by chemo and radiation. The prognosis is not good. Median survival rate is 14 months. He's hoping to join a study group in Miami and make it 5 years. That's pretty much the maximum he'll have...and that's pushing it.

This is so unfair!!! We die from heart attacks in our family, not fucking brain cancer. He's never smoked, eats all the right things, and is a freaking long distance cyclist at 51. What good does the heart and body of a much younger man do you when the big "C" comes along and robs you of everything?!?!?

I am so pissed off at the fucking world right now!!!! I have a paper due tomorrow. Super strict prof, doesn't give extensions for any reason. Frankly, right now I don't fucking care!!!!!

not that you can, but i'm guessing your brother would say "write the paper". he still wants the best for you also.

[LoungeMachine]

Screw the paper.....

Family comes first.

:gulp:

Hang in there, sweetie.

[WACF]

My thoughts are with you Angel....

[PETE'S BROTHER]

Screw the paper.....

Family comes first.

:gulp:





Hang in there, sweetie.

that too.

[loucap81]

He's hoping to join a study group in Miami and make it 5 years. That's pretty much the maximum he'll have...and that's pushing it.

You don't know that. ALS is supposed to kill you within a few years after onset and yet Stephen Hawking has managed to live with it for decades. Why can't your brother be the outlier and beat the odds? From what you've said about him, he's definitely the kind of guy who is no stranger to challenges. I am very sure he's going to give this everything he has. His superior health can only help. Very few people are better equipped to fight this than he is.

[Momshell]

I agree with Lou. Plus you can't listen to the first doctor. Get as many opinions as possible. I got 4. The first was the worst and was giving me all sorts of life expectancy shit. The others told me he was crazy. You never know.

[katina]

Angel, I send my best wishes and positives thoughts to you and your family

[Angel]

I have to be a realist, it's my way of coping. If I accept he has 2-5 years left, I can deal with it. If I convince myself he's going to beat the odds and he doesn't, I'll have to go through the grieving process all over again. This way I can deal with it and accept it.

This is a very hard one to beat...

[Momshell]

I have to be a realist, it's my way of coping. If I accept he has 2-5 years left, I can deal with it. If I convince myself he's going to beat the odds and he doesn't, I'll have to go through the grieving process all over again. This way I can deal with it and accept it.

This is a very hard one to beat...

Makes sense. Whatever works for you. Feel free to let it out here :)

[mh5150]

I have to be a realist, it's my way of coping. If I accept he has 2-5 years left, I can deal with it. If I convince myself he's going to beat the odds and he doesn't, I'll have to go through the grieving process all over again. This way I can deal with it and accept it.

This is a very hard one to beat...

I think that's how I would need to deal with the situation too.

[Light Em' Up!]

We are your family here too Angel...even though we can't be there to wrap our arms around you to give you a hug, we are all there with you in spirit. I'm sure you can feel all of our love and support....please continue to lean on us as you need to. Get mad, get sad, do whatever you need to....we will always be here for you.

[katina]

We are your family here too Angel...even though we can't be there to wrap our arms around you to give you a hug, we are all there with you in spirit. I'm sure you can feel all of our love and support....please continue to lean on us as you need to. Get mad, get sad, do whatever you need to....we will always be here for you.

I think and feel the same, Angel :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

[Hardrock69]

Best of luck to you and your family Angel.

[Angel]

Thanks everyone. Surgery went well, no speech or motor issues. MRI is clear, so it looks like they got it all. Not sure when chemo/radiation therapy starts but it will be soon.

I've reached the acceptance part of the process now. Thank goodness for that because I can actually focus on school again.

I do apologize to those I lashed out at during the anger phase though. ;)

[fraroc]

My grandmother was first diagnosed with lung cancer in 1997, she was supposed to live only 5 years and guess what? She's still alive today. There is still hope for him, Angel :)

[Angel]

My grandmother was first diagnosed with lung cancer in 1997, she was supposed to live only 5 years and guess what? She's still alive today. There is still hope for him, Angel :)

My Grandma was told she had about 6 mos. when she was 80. She died at 99. There's always hope, and every day we get will just be the icing on the cake.

On another note, got the extension on the paper, and it's getting handed in 5 hours prior to deadline. :)

[loucap81]

I'm happy to hear that you have some good news to fall back on. The thing to remember is that if anyone is fully equipped to fight this, it's your brother.

[loucap81]

Anything newsworthy with this, or are you guys just all hanging in there for the time being? How's your brother feeling right now?

[Nitro Express]

My grandmother was first diagnosed with lung cancer in 1997, she was supposed to live only 5 years and guess what? She's still alive today. There is still hope for him, Angel :)

I have seen the same in several cases. It's not over until the fat lady sings and sometimes she is too busy raiding the refrigerator than to sing at a funeral.

[Angel]

Anything newsworthy with this, or are you guys just all hanging in there for the time being? How's your brother feeling right now?

Surgery went well. No speech/motor issues. He got out of the hospital Friday. I haven't spoken to him yet because he's been having a lot of headaches.

I imagine he needs to regain his strength before they start Chemo/radiation. Mom wasn't sure when it would be starting. From what I can gather, he is going to do the vaccine study thing. I'll know more once he's feeling better and ready to talk on the phone.

I can tell the stress is getting to Mom, every time I talk to her (which is almost every day) she mentions the vaccine at least once. It's her beacon of hope.

I'm just hoping I can figure out a way to get home for Christmas. We haven't had a family Christmas with us all there in more years than I can remember...

[Nickdfresh]

Hopefully, he has a shot at full remission...

[Angel]

Hopefully, he has a shot at full remission...

The odds are against it, but there's always hope....something like the final exam I just wrote.

I've been studying as much as I can the last two weeks, and NONE of it stuck. Fuck, when I was young I could remember everything, no matter how much stress I was facing.

This is going to pull my GPA way down, I'm sure. :(

[loucap81]

Any (hopefully positive) news with this?

[sadaist]

I can tell the stress is getting to Mom,.


When i found out i needed chemo, it was to start on a Monday. 2 days after my Mom went to Hawaii for 10 days for her 1x per year getaway. So I didn't tell her until she got back. She was so fucking pissed off at me. But I don't care. With as much stressing as she did, I figured that first 10 days she deserved in Hawaii without worry. She probably would have canceled her trip.

Moms really shouldn't have to deal with their childs sickness. Sometimes I think it makes them feel even sicker than the 1 getting the dang treatments, lol.

[binnie]

My thoughts are with you, Angel.

Let's hope that the worst is over.

[Angel]

Any (hopefully positive) news with this?

Unfortunately, no. He started radiation treatments last week. Went to Seattle to check out some of the study stuff but it didn't sound very promising. Only time will tell....

Right now I'm busy worrying about my son. He has Cannabinoid hyperemesis syndrome. Last week he went to emerg for it (causes nasty stomach pain and non-stop vomiting). His BP was really high in the ambulance so they tested his cardiac enzymes. Troponin levels were high, meaning he had sustained heart damage. I'm telling you, when it rains....it pours.

[sadaist]

I'm telling you, when it rains....it pours.


You got that right sister.


Sorry I wasn't around when you made this thread. My thoughts are with you and the ones fighting to feel better & live happy. Sickness sucks ass and sometimes the grueling process of the health care is just as bad. But all my good karma thoughts go out to you & yours that there will be a great light at the end of this shit tunnel where everyone can be healthy & happy again with this crap behind them.


Then you can get back to just being bitchy to us for no reason at all. :)

[Angel]

Then you can get back to just being bitchy to us for no reason at all. :)

Oh, there's always a reason, I just don't always share, lol

[katina]

Best wishes and positive thoughts for your son and your brother.

[loucap81]

Same here.

[sadaist]

Oh, there's always a reason, I just don't always share, lol


haha


At least your sense of humor is still intact. Stay frosty Angel.

[Angel]

haha


At least your sense of humor is still intact. Stay frosty Angel.

If I ever lose my sense of humour, please shoot me. :biggrin:

[Angel]

Well, he's sporting a new fashion choice. One of his friends gave him the title "Osama Kim Laden"... lol

...and yes, his woman is absolutely stunning!!!

[Angel]

When I went home at Xmas, bro wasn't doing too bad. Appetite problems from the chemotherapy, but that was about it...

Wish I could say the same thing now. The Damn chemotherapy is killing the good brain cells, and he is having problems with his speech, memory and thought processes.

I feel so bad for my mom. Her glass is always 3/4 full, let alone 1/2. She is realizing that the prognosis is not good, and while I'm happy she's accepting the fact that she will probably be burying her son in the near future, I'm pissed off that she has to. She's already buried one child...parents aren't supposed to outlive their children...it's not fair!

[DLR Bridge]

I'm sorry to hear this Angel. Cancer and Chemo are a God damn double edged sword. Going through it with my Mom. All the best to you and your family.

[Angel]

I'm sorry to hear this Angel. Cancer and Chemo are a God damn double edged sword. Going through it with my Mom. All the best to you and your family.

Thanks doll. Sorry to hear about your Mom. Hope she gets well soon. I hope I never have to face it...it truly is nasty shit. :(

[Sensible Shoes]

Keep the faith girl. There is always room for a miracle.

[katina]

Angel, I send positive thoughts for you and your family.

[bb64]

parents aren't supposed to outlive their children...it's not fair!

We lost my 15 year old nephew to cancer last May...devastating to watch...My brother will never be the same.

[cadaverdog]

Thanks doll. Sorry to hear about your Mom. Hope she gets well soon. I hope I never have to face it...it truly is nasty shit. :(
Yes it is. My mom died of liver cancer and her brother (my uncle) has prostate cancer. Every time I get a back pain I worry about having it. That's how my uncle found out he did. But he's had it for ten years and he's still hanging in there.
I hope your kin is as lucky as he has been. And then some.

[Angel]

Yes it is. My mom died of liver cancer and her brother (my uncle) has prostate cancer. Every time I get a back pain I worry about having it. That's how my uncle found out he did. But he's had it for ten years and he's still hanging in there.
I hope your kin is as lucky as he has been. And then some.
I'm sorry to hear about your mom C-dog. Liver cancer seems to be one of the nastier ones. I hope she didn't suffer too much.

[Angel]

We lost my 15 year old nephew to cancer last May...devastating to watch...My brother will never be the same.

Oh bb, I'm so sorry. I was 15 when my oldest brother died a week before his 20th birthday. It destroyed my father. I hope your brother is able to find happiness again.

[TFM_Dale]

When I went home at Xmas, bro wasn't doing too bad. Appetite problems from the chemotherapy, but that was about it...

Wish I could say the same thing now. The Damn chemotherapy is killing the good brain cells, and he is having problems with his speech, memory and thought processes.

I feel so bad for my mom. Her glass is always 3/4 full, let alone 1/2. She is realizing that the prognosis is not good, and while I'm happy she's accepting the fact that she will probably be burying her son in the near future, I'm pissed off that she has to. She's already buried one child...parents aren't supposed to outlive their children...it's not fair!

So sorry for all that is going on, sometimes life truly isn't fair but I wish you and yours the best of luck with all this, our prayers are with you.

Sent from my Nexus 7

[TFM_Dale]

I'm sorry to hear this Angel. Cancer and Chemo are a God damn double edged sword. Going through it with my Mom. All the best to you and your family.

It really does suck, so sorry to hear this.

Sent from my Nexus 7

[TFM_Dale]

We lost my 15 year old nephew to cancer last May...devastating to watch...My brother will never be the same.

Damn, far to young, of course any age is to young for dealing with cancer. Sorry for your loss.

Sent from my Nexus 7

[TFM_Dale]

Yes it is. My mom died of liver cancer and her brother (my uncle) has prostate cancer. Every time I get a back pain I worry about having it. That's how my uncle found out he did. But he's had it for ten years and he's still hanging in there.
I hope your kin is as lucky as he has been. And then some.

Damn man, very sorry for your loss, best wishes to your family.

Sent from my Nexus 7

[cadaverdog]

I'm sorry to hear about your mom C-dog. Liver cancer seems to be one of the nastier ones. I hope she didn't suffer too much.
Unfortunately she did. She wouldn't go to the doctor even though she had great insurance. She was tired of living I guess. She never got over losing a daughter at 24. She lost faith in everything after that. She even asked that religion not be mentioned at her funeral. She had been a churcher for her whole life before that.

[Nitro Express]

My sister lucked out. She went in for just a routine exam and the doctor discovered cancer in the early stages. They were amazed that he even found it but he did. It was a type of cancer that spreads fast and she just had to do minor surgery and take the nuclear medicine without full on chemo to get rid of it.

This is why I always want to be able to choose my own doctor. You never will see that specialist unless your private physician sends you to them. A lot of serious health problems can be caught early by a family practitioner. By going back to the same one they know you, your family medical trends, and can see what's normal and what isn't specific to you. It's very important that you have that kind of relationship with your doctor and you go in for a check up once a year.

[sadaist]

When I went home at Xmas, bro wasn't doing too bad. Appetite problems from the chemotherapy, but that was about it...

Wish I could say the same thing now. The Damn chemotherapy is killing the good brain cells, and he is having problems with his speech, memory and thought processes.

I feel so bad for my mom. Her glass is always 3/4 full, let alone 1/2. She is realizing that the prognosis is not good, and while I'm happy she's accepting the fact that she will probably be burying her son in the near future, I'm pissed off that she has to. She's already buried one child...parents aren't supposed to outlive their children...it's not fair!


Man this sucks Angel. I really feel sad for you guys. And that's not bullshit. Luckily you guys still have a lot of love for one another. I haven't had contact with anyone in my old family in at least 2 years.....and those last contacts were not positive. No one wants to die & no one cares or even knows about it. You want to think everyone around you loves you & will miss you & remember you. But don't concentrate too much on that. Enjoy every moment you can while everyone is still here.

As far as parents outliving children....one thing that I feel that I know is selfish of me but I kinda wish I would have died before my mom did. My reasoning being when I go I want that 1 person with unconditional love for me to care.

Chemo is awful. Wish I had some tips but I don't. It just sucks & he has to find anything he can to grasp on to. One big thing that pulled me through was we planned a 7 day Mexico cruise for right after my chemo ended. So it gave me motivation each day to get through it & once over I had about 10 days to try & regain as much health as possible for the cruise. I was still pretty sick on the cruise & had no appetite.......but I really loved seeing those places in Mexico.

....and one last thing. Years later I still have "chemo brain". My brain doesn't work like it used to. I notice it in little things but my concentration is different. My dreams are different. I process things different. And it pisses me off because doctors don't really believe me.

[sadaist]

We lost my 15 year old nephew to cancer last May...devastating to watch...My brother will never be the same.


15 is a crime. :(

so unfair. Makes you mad at God and even curse him. My condolences. That's just fucked up unfair.

[ELVIS]

It may be wise for you to look into Beyond Tangy Tangerine® and Ultimate Classic®...

http://www.youngevity.net/mm5/graphics/00000001/Beyond-TT-Canister_420.jpg


San Diego, CA – January 25, 2013 (http://youngevity.com/news-events/al-international-jcof-announces-results-of-youngevity-clinical-research-studies-performed-by-clemson-university-institute-of-nutraceutical-research/) – Youngevity® Essential Life Sciences (www.youngevity.com), a wholly-owned subsidiary of AL International, Inc. (OTC Pink: JCOF) (www.alintjcof.com), a fast growing, innovative, global direct marketer of healthy lifestyle and nutritional products and gourmet fortified coffee, announced today the exciting results of a series of clinical research studies performed by Clemson University – Institute of Nutraceutical Research (“INR”).

The INR is a national leader in nutritional research and one of the most highly regarded organizations in the field of phytonutrients, vitamins and minerals. The goals of the INR are to develop greater confidence in product quality, effectiveness, and enhance consumer demand for quality nutraceutical products.

The clinical studies were performed to identify the potential benefits of Youngevity’s signature core products, Beyond Tangy Tangerine® and Ultimate Classic®. Youngevity’s mission was to truly understand and clinically substantiate the health promoting benefits of these two products. Individually, each product targets specific areas, needs, and nutritional deficiencies of the body.

Multiple studies were recommended by Clemson University scientists to provide a comprehensive evaluation of the Youngevity® products. Specific biomarkers were chosen to study in the areas of safety, inflammation, and when Beyond Tangy Tangerine® and Ultimate Classic® were administered to cancer cell cultures.

Youngevity® Clinical Research Study Highlights:

Dietary supplement safety is the most highly regarded aspect of any of the Youngevity® various products and has become synonymous with the Youngevity® name and brand. Although Youngevity® only uses nutrients that are absolutely needed by the body and in forms that are highly bioavailable, Youngevity® felt it was important to show empirically the range and degree of safety through looking at (3) factors – Genotoxicity, Anti-Genotoxicity, and Anti-Mutagenicity.

The results of the experiments showed that Beyond Tangy Tangerine® and Ultimate Classic® at various concentrations did not show any genotoxicity.

When Beyond Tangy Tangerine® and Ultimate Classic® were administered to healthy human cell lines; they did not induce or create any inflammatory response in levels above and below the recommended dosage. Beyond Tangy Tangerine® and Ultimate Classic® showed inflammation protective properties and heightened the body’s protective responses to possible inflammation.

When Beyond Tangy Tangerine® and Ultimate Classic® were administered to healthy human colon cells; there was no significant death of healthy human cells compared to cancerous colon cells. Ultimate Classic® killed 95% of cancerous colon cells, 65% of cancerous liver cells, 65% of cancerous stomach cells, and 30% of cancerous breast cells. Beyond Tangy Tangerine® killed 60% of cancerous colon cells, 65% of cancerous liver and stomach cells, and 30% of cancerous breast cells.

Beyond Tangy Tangerine® and Ultimate Classic® both exhibited efficient inhibition on proliferation of cancerous cells at the recommended dosage levels. Both products showed there was inhibition of the growth of more cancerous cells, preventing further malignant multiplication and growth of unhealthy cells.
The Clemson University studies have provided Youngevity® greater confidence in their products, scientist, formulators, and manufacturing processes and helped to understand some of the pathways the Youngevity® products may be working through in order to provide these benefits.

AL International CEO, Steve Wallach, adds, “At Youngevity® we have always sought to provide high quality and safe products, these studies have added to the assurance we have in all of the Youngevity® products.”

About Youngevity(R) Essential Life Sciences

Youngevity® Essential Life Sciences (www.youngevity.com ), headquartered in San Diego, CA, is a nutrition and lifestyle-related services company dedicated to promoting vibrant health and flourishing economics. Founded in 1997 by Drs. Joel Wallach, DVM, ND, and Ma Lan, MD, as AL Global, Inc., the company adopted the name Youngevity in 2006. Youngevity® is the only direct selling company to have a qualified FDA Health Claim. Dr. Wallach’s work has been published in more than 70 peer-reviewed and referenced scientific journals and books.



:elvis:

[ELVIS]

Oh, and when Sesh tells you Dr. Wallach the Veterinarian is a quack, tell him to shut the fuck up...;)

[sadaist]

Oh, and when Sesh tells you Dr. Wallach the Veterinarian is a quack, tell him to shut the fuck up...;)



It's kinda fun to tell Sesh to shut the fuck up no matter what he says :)

[FORD]

Fucking sick of cancer.... saw 4 people die from the shit within a decade. Ages ranging from 19 to mid 60's, but they all went before their time.

Number 5 is in the works.... someone I've known since I was 5 years old. First girl I ever kissed actually. And her mom and my mom have known each other since they were kids, etc. It's not like me and her are close now or anything, haven't seen her in years, but it still sucks to hear something like that. Stage 4 breast cancer and it's spread to the lymph nodes and fuck knows what else.... doesn't sound good.

Maybe if we spent money researching cures for cancer instead of subsidizing the very industries that cause it (tobacco/pharma/factory GMO farms) none of us would have to type sad shit like this anymore.

[Nickdfresh]

Oh, and when Sesh tells you Dr. Wallach the Veterinarian is a quack, tell him to shut the fuck up...;)

You're a dumb sap! Not only is he a "quack", he's a proven liar that makes patently absurd claims with no basis in the truth - and profits from the suckers who buy his shit. What's in your expensive Tang® can probably gotten for a fraction of the price with some simple research. Wallach is one of the internet doctors that peddle their supplements as some sort of health tonic. It may well have some benefits. It may well have done well in one study. There's also a chance in your little advert you've posted that several other studies have shown this to be nothing more than a shit-tonic. We won't know this because he won't tell you this probably because he's a quack peddling snakeoil. And you're too much of a lazy cunt to be at all skeptical of his theoretical bullshit based on bad science and debunked in most studies....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joel_D._Wallach#Criticism
http://sciencebasedpharmacy.files.wordpress.com/2012/08/snake-oil-circa-1903.jpg

The basic appeal of Dr. Wallach is the hope he gives to people who fear or are mistrustful of medical doctors and scientific knowledge. He gives hope to those who want to live for a really long time. He gives hope to those who are diagnosed with diseases for which current medical knowledge has no cure. He gives hope to those who want to avoid getting a terminal disease. And he gives hope to those who want to be healthy but who do not want to diet or exercise. All we have to do is drink a magic elixir of colloidal minerals and we'll be healthy. You can't just take your minerals in pill form, he warns us. You must take the colloidal variety in liquid form. Until he had a falling out with T.J. Clark & Co., this elixir had to come from special pits in Utah. After John H. Renner, M.D., President of the National Council Against Health Fraud, exposed the "distortions, bogus science, and outright lies" in Wallach's tape, T.J. Clark & Co. "severed its business relationship with him."* Wallach then "revised his 'scientific' opinion and quickly moved on to find new partners."*

the audiotape

Dr. Wallach seems to be most famous for a widely circulated audiotape he calls "Dead Doctors Don't Lie." [It is also available in video tape and book form.] The label of the tape notes that Dr. Wallach was a Nobel Prize nominee. This is true. He was nominated for a Nobel Prize in medicine by the Association of Eclectic Physicians "for his notable and untiring work with deficiencies of the trace mineral selenium and its relationship to the congenital genesis of Cystic Fibrosis." The Association of Eclectic Physicians is a group of naturopaths founded in 1982 by two naturopathic physicians, Dr. Edward Alstat and Dr. Michael Ancharski. In his book Let's Play Doctor (co-authored with Ma Lan, M.D., M.S.) he states that cystic fibrosis is preventable, is 100% curable in the early stages, can be managed very well in chronic cases, leading to a normal life expectancy (75 years). If these claims were true, he might have won the Prize. He didn't win, but he gave a lot of false hope to parents of children with cystic fibrosis.

The basic danger of Dr. Wallach's theories is not that taking colloidal minerals will harm people, or even that many people will be wasting their money on a product they do not need. Many of his claims are not backed up with scientific control studies, but are anecdotal or fictional. The basic danger is that because he and other naturopaths exaggerate the role of minerals in good health, they may be totally ignored by the scientific community even if they happen to hit on some real connections between minerals and disease. Furthermore, there is the chance that legitimate scientific researchers may avoid this field for fear of being labeled a kook.

http://skepdic.com/wallach.html

[sadaist]

Maybe if we spent money researching cures for cancer instead of subsidizing the very industries that cause it (tobacco/pharma/factory GMO farms) none of us would have to type sad shit like this anymore.


It always drives me crazy when I hear of a group of elite medical researchers that spend 7 years studying if kids will eat more fruit if sprayed with a light sugar coating. Umm yeah. We need to be researching cancer, aids, alzheimers, diabetes, mental health, etc. I know we already have a lot of resources invested in the big ones but to me it's not enough. It will never be enough until there is an immunization shot everyone can get to prevent them all.

As for breast cancer, that kinda pisses me off too. So much is invested in to that when there are a shitload more other types of cancers that are killing people every day. I don't know. You always want the most resources & attention focused in to the thing that is directly affecting you & your loved ones I suppose. If I were paralyzed due to a spine injury I'd be yelling how we don't spend enough on curing nerve damages & paralysis.

[ThrillsNSpills]

I thought Wallach was the Dead Doctors don't lie perpetrator.
I got one of those tapes in the mid 90's, I just can't imagine what list I got on to receive it.
I didn't get the colloidal minerals, but it was an interesting marketing device at the time, even though I don't know what kind of response he got, since everyone would rather live how they want, then get a pill when they fall apart.

The only challenge I saw with El's supplement was that it's got stuff like aluminum and other crap in it, and it was advertised on Alex Jones, and apparently is an MLM deal, which validates several of Nick's points. At the same time, it's got a lot of good elements in the ingrediants, however how does anyone know if they are actually bioavailable once they get in the body....

[sadaist]

I thought Wallach was the Dead Doctors don't lie perpetrator.
I got one of those tapes in the mid 90's, I just can't imagine what list I got on to receive it.
I didn't get the colloidal minerals, but it was an interesting marketing device at the time, even though I don't know what kind of response he got, since everyone would rather live how they want, then get a pill when they fall apart.

The only challenge I saw with El's supplement was that it's got stuff like aluminum and other crap in it, and it was advertised on Alex Jones, and apparently is an MLM deal, which validates several of Nick's points. At the same time, it's got a lot of good elements in the ingrediants, however how does anyone know if they are actually bioavailable once they get in the body....



The problem is our foods we eat every day are lacking the general nutrition we require. 200 years ago a lot of the problems we have today were non existent. Maybe conspiracy theory crap but on Coast To Coast I've hear a few shows how everything is manufactured today lacking the basic things we used to get just from eating normal fruits & vegetables, farm animal meat, and plain water or milk. So now we take these supplements to try & make up for it when really all we need daily we should be getting just from a normal diet. But no one eats a normal diet. Sodas, processed foods, preservatives, etc.

I do take a 1 a day vitamin but I have no idea if it is helping me at all.

[Nitro Express]

I've always had to stay away from processed foods because I'm allergic to the preservatives and additives. My mom was always good about cooking healthy and making sure we didn't eat a lot of junk. Face it we are products of our childhoods and a lot of people's addictions and poor lifestyle choices in many cases can be linked back to how they grew up. We had a big garden and we had relatives close by who had fruit orchards, ranches, and farms. I still raise my own open grazed beef because that is what I grew up on and can't stand the steroid filled, chemical injected and corn fed beef you get in stores.

Another problem is microwaving food destroys nutrients. A microwave is nothing but a high frequency radio transmitter and heats by exciting the water molecules in food. That process destroys some of the nutrients. So if you are eating mostly processed, microwavable food, you are probably vitamin deficient. It's also important to drink water that has minerals in it instead of distilled water. There are a zillion kinds of vitamin supplements but your body can always extract what it needs from natural foods easier than it can from pills and capsules. Most of what's in those vitamins is going to pass on through you.

[ELVIS]

I thought Wallach was the Dead Doctors don't lie perpetrator.
I got one of those tapes in the mid 90's, I just can't imagine what list I got on to receive it.
I didn't get the colloidal minerals, but it was an interesting marketing device at the time, even though I don't know what kind of response he got, since everyone would rather live how they want, then get a pill when they fall apart.

The only challenge I saw with El's supplement was that it's got stuff like aluminum and other crap in it, and it was advertised on Alex Jones, and apparently is an MLM deal, which validates several of Nick's points. At the same time, it's got a lot of good elements in the ingrediants, however how does anyone know if they are actually bioavailable once they get in the body....

Try it...

I've been taking BTT for over a year...

[Nitro Express]

People need to just learn to listen to their bodies. It tells you what it needs and doesn't like. If you eat something and you have more energy afterwards and feel better then that is a sign there is something in it your body needs. The same thing with suppliments. I notice my skin is better and my joints to ache as much if I take Norwegian fish oil and Antlantic Krill oil together. I do better if I boost my vitamin C and vitamin D3 in the winter. I also do oxygen therapy. I rarely get sick.

[sadaist]

. Most of what's in those vitamins is going to pass on through you.


Yep. Daily vitamin makes my first morning pee bright yellow. Expensive pee.

[Angel]

The problem is our foods we eat every day are lacking the general nutrition we require. 200 years ago a lot of the problems we have today were non existent. Maybe conspiracy theory crap but on Coast To Coast I've hear a few shows how everything is manufactured today lacking the basic things we used to get just from eating normal fruits & vegetables, farm animal meat, and plain water or milk. So now we take these supplements to try & make up for it when really all we need daily we should be getting just from a normal diet. But no one eats a normal diet. Sodas, processed foods, preservatives, etc.

I do take a 1 a day vitamin but I have no idea if it is helping me at all.

200 years ago we also had a lot of problems that are rarely seen today (rickets). You just have to eat smart. And you're bang on about microwaves. I use mine to heat my coffee and the cats food and that's about it.

[Nitro Express]

Yep. Daily vitamin makes my first morning pee bright yellow. Expensive pee.

You can save quite a bit if you buy your vitamins at Cosco. They have a deal with Schiff so the Kirkland brand is actually Schiff which is a reputable company.

[sadaist]

You can save quite a bit if you buy your vitamins at Cosco. They have a deal with Schiff so the Kirkland brand is actually Schiff which is a reputable company.


I know a lot of the vitamin I take just gets peed out. But my diet is so poor right now & I always am very run down due to my current life situation that it does actually make me feel a little better taking them. Even though some just go right through me, some are being used up & that's a good thing.

[sadaist]

As soon as I was diagnoses with cancer I started doing a lot of self research. I was at the health store twice a week & spent $100's of dollars on pills like cranberry, shark cartilage, eye of newt, tarantula hair, etc...(ok, just the shark cartilage & cranberry is correct) no clue if it did anything. Probably not. But when you are desperate you will try anything. Hell, if I was told eating a hippopotamus' vagina would have cured me I would have.



http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Votc4_q9zLI/UDh7LnXGXaI/AAAAAAAAO_c/CHAWuHw2jh4/s1600/Hippopotamus4.jpg

[ELVIS]

Yeah, you'd eat a Hippo but You wont change your crappy diet, mood or lifestyle...

I like when people die of cancer and everyone says "he lost his battle with cancer"...

There was usually no battle, the cancer kicked ass and the pussy crawled in the corner and died...

Your Cancer is gonna come back, dude and you need to be proactive...

You can fight it off, and that BTT supplement is a good way to start...

The Clemson study I posted proved these Youngevity products "inhibit of the growth of more cancerous cells, preventing further malignant multiplication and growth of unhealthy cells."

Based on that alone, you should give it a $40 try...

Then you need to stop eating shit that is known to cause cancer...

You cannot eat nitrates or nitrites that is in 90% of all processed meats...

You cannot eat fried food or any overheated oils...

Overheating oils or meat fat or butter causes free radicals, Heterocyclic amines and acrylamides are carcinogenic and cause inflammation...

Stop eating sugar, it feeds cancer and supresses the immune system...

I would also say stop eating oils as they oxidize and again are a source of free radicals...

Butter is better, but never overheated...

And on and on...


Anyway, Sadist, I'm just rambling...

But even though I'm just a stupid hick cunspiracy nut, I do care about people and I'm fascinated with subjects like this...

Gimme a holla any time...


:elvis:

[Angel]

Yeah, you'd eat a Hippo but You wont change your crappy diet, mood or lifestyle...

I like when people die of cancer and everyone says "he lost his battle with cancer"...

There was usually no battle, the cancer kicked ass and the pussy crawled in the corner and died...

Your Cancer is gonna come back, dude and you need to be proactive...

You can fight it off, and that BTT supplement is a good way to start...

The Clemson study I posted proved these Youngevity products "inhibit of the growth of more cancerous cells, preventing further malignant multiplication and growth of unhealthy cells."

Based on that alone, you should give it a $40 try...

Then you need to stop eating shit that is known to cause cancer...



:elvis:

Go fuck yourself. I have family members that are FIGHTING THE BATTLE as we speak....and one of them is the epitome of healthy living, has been for years. The night he had the seizure that led to his diagnosis? He went on a 95 km bike ride that day.

And who the hell are you to tell Sadaist to change his lifestyle....you have no Fucking clue what his lifestyle may be.

[cadaverdog]

.

I like when people die of cancer and everyone says "he lost his battle with cancer"...

There was usually no battle, the cancer kicked ass and the pussy crawled in the corner and died...




That's a pretty insensitive thing to post. Hoping for a modding position?

[Angel]

That's a pretty insensitive thing to post. Hoping for a modding position?

Every now and then you post something that surprises me...

[Nickdfresh]

That's a pretty insensitive thing to post. Hoping for a modding position?

He WAS a mod you stupid dick! I've never posted anything like that....and yes he's a cunt!

[chefcraig]

Go fuck yourself. I have family members that are FIGHTING THE BATTLE as we speak....and one of them is the epitome of healthy living, has been for years. The night he had the seizure that led to his diagnosis? He went on a 95 km bike ride that day.

And who the hell are you to tell Sadaist to change his lifestyle....you have no Fucking clue what his lifestyle may be.

Ang, stop. Consider what is truly being said, and let it slide. Without a doubt, there isn't a soul here that hasn't lost a loved one, or are currently witnessing the decline of one's facilities due to cancer or any other immunity.

Yeah, you can get pissed at the remarks made by others who are incapable of fathoming the harrowing hardship, yet ultimately, it's a waste of your own strength and energy.

I'm not fucking around here. Do what I do, and for once, I really do know of where I speak: Ignore it, yet if you must acknowledge it, turn into positive efforts. Take that anger that we all share, and rather than wasting it on a dumb rock band web site, put that force toward doing whatever ya can for the concerned loved one.

Yeah, the shit I'm witnessing drains my energy and more often than not, provokes me to drink myself to sleep most nights. It's like having a monkey or vampire on your back or neck 24/7. So personally, I can not afford to waste time, effort nor intelligence arguing battles in cyberspace that I'll never win, let alone are pretty much bone-headedly dumb to engage in the first place.

The few positive thoughts I have left over I share with you, yours, and anyone else out there going through the same turmoil.

Be strong, hang in there, and in my favorite quote from Clint Eastwood's Heartbreak Ridge:


Don't give the prick(s) the satisfaction, sir.

http://img1.imagehousing.com/69/97cb60cc2f147ca92cb8297c1147a50e.jpg (http://www.imagehousing.com/image/1109801)

[ELVIS]

Go fuck yourself. I have family members that are FIGHTING THE BATTLE as we speak....and one of them is the epitome of healthy living, has been for years. The night he had the seizure that led to his diagnosis? He went on a 95 km bike ride that day.

And who the hell are you to tell Sadaist to change his lifestyle....you have no Fucking clue what his lifestyle may be.

Calm down, dumbass...

Stress is bad for you...

[Angel]

Calm down, dumbass...

Stress is bad for you...

Which is why when something pisses me off, I don't hold it in. :D

Primal scream therapy...works great!

[cadaverdog]

I've never posted anything like that.
Who said you did? Back to the subject please.

[cadaverdog]

Every now and then you post something that surprises me...
With the exception of one group of peeps I get along with most people here. I'll leave it at that. This is a serious subject.

[sadaist]

And who the hell are you to tell Sadaist to change his lifestyle....you have no Fucking clue what his lifestyle may be.


Thanks Angel. Appreciate the support. But Elvis & I get along just fine. He is right in that I do nothing to "fight" off cancer coming back. My lifestyle for health is shit. But I kinda don't care. I think a lot of getting cancer has to do with genetics & a lot less with how we live than we would like to believe. You always see these super healthy lifestyle people getting something bad & dying young....then you got people like Charlie Sheen who will live to 97. No rhyme or reason. My grandparents & great-grandparents all smoked, drank, ate tons of butter, lard, sugar, red meat, etc and all lived into their 90's. None of them ever took a vitamin in their life. So I don't really know how much it makes a difference. I do know that I'm not helping my cause. A lot of it is just being in a crappy place in life where I just don't have the money to live as healthy as I would like, but I also admit to that being somewhat of an excuse as well. I can't afford the ideal lifestyle, but I sure could be living healthier than I currently am.

[ELVIS]

And in no was was I trying to be a dick dude...

I know we're cool and I was just stating my mind as always...


:cool:

[sadaist]

Which is why when something pisses me off, I don't hold it in. :D

Primal scream therapy...works great!



It's not good to hold anything in. I don't even like to hold back a sneeze. Feels way too good to just let those suckers rip.



AAACCCHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[envy_me]

Chemo is awful. Wish I had some tips but I don't. It just sucks & he has to find anything he can to grasp on to. One big thing that pulled me through was we planned a 7 day Mexico cruise for right after my chemo ended. So it gave me motivation each day to get through it & once over I had about 10 days to try & regain as much health as possible for the cruise. I was still pretty sick on the cruise & had no appetite.......but I really loved seeing those places in Mexico.



That musy be awful!!! I can't even imagine what it feels like or how people find motivation to stick through it. If somebody told me this morning when my hangover was worst "Do you wanna die now?" I'd be like "YES". I'd never be able to take much of nausea and just feeling bad that serious illness causes. We don't have cancer in my family. The fact is, thank god, that I don't think I even know anybody who has had it. I hope it will stay that way.

What does chemo feel like? What do they do when you're there?

[Angel]

It's not good to hold anything in. I don't even like to hold back a sneeze. Feels way too good to just let those suckers rip.



AAACCCHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello, I'm getting old...don't even hold farts in anymore, lol

[Nickdfresh]

And in no was was I trying to be a dick dude...

I know we're cool and I was just stating my mind as always...


:cool:

No need to try, you're inherently one...

[Igosplut]

Ang, stop. Consider what is truly being said, and let it slide. Without a doubt, there isn't a soul here that hasn't lost a loved one, or are currently witnessing the decline of one's facilities due to cancer or any other immunity.

Yeah, you can get pissed at the remarks made by others who are incapable of fathoming the harrowing hardship, yet ultimately, it's a waste of your own strength and energy.

Amen brother, I've lost most of my family to cancer.

If you haven't been in that position, you'd never understand (not you, but a general statement).

Easy to preach, but harder to live.

[Igosplut]

Yeah, you'd eat a Hippo but You wont change your crappy diet, mood or lifestyle...

I like when people die of cancer and everyone says "he lost his battle with cancer"...

There was usually no battle, the cancer kicked ass and the pussy crawled in the corner and died...

Your Cancer is gonna come back, dude and you need to be proactive...

Ya know something? As a nurse I expected better out of you.

It isn't about what YOU think, as much as what the mind-set of the people who are dealing with their mortality...

Think about that..

[sadaist]

Hello, I'm getting old...don't even hold farts in anymore, lol



:lmao:



What's the saying for men over 50? Something like...


Don't ever waste a boner, and don't ever trust a fart.

[sadaist]

What does chemo feel like? What do they do when you're there?



Sit in a recliner chair all day while you are hooked to an IV. And it just puts the medication in to you. I had to have 3 medications so 3 IV bags. That took about 1 hour each. But what really killed me was since they are so severe on the kidneys I also had to have between 4-6 bags of just fluid to make sure I peed a ton & kept the kidneys moving to avoid damage. So just the plain fluid took another 4-6 hours. So I was there 8+ hours a day 5 days a week. I wish they would have just let me chug a ton of water or gatorade instead of adding all those extra hours but they wouldn't budge.

Other than that you just have zero energy, all taste buds are gone & you have no apetite anyways. and it's like an extremely bad case of the flu where your whole body aches & you just overall feel like shit. Another thing is I was freezing the entire time. At my apartment I would have heater on high, be wrapped in sweats & a wool blanket, and have a wool cap on & still be freezing. When people came to see me they were sweating lol.

You want to sleep a lot because you feel like shit & are so tired but the body will only take so many hours of sleep per day. So at some point you have to stay awake to be able to sleep

The 3 drugs I was on was:

Bleomycin http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bleomycin

Etoposide http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Etoposide

Cisplatin http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cisplatin


they gave me TONS of other prescriptions to ward off the effects of the chemo drugs but most I didn't take after once or twice. The side effects were not as bad from the chemo as the side effects from the other prescriptions.

[Igosplut]

Sit in a recliner chair all day while you are hooked to an IV. And it just puts the medication in to you. I had to have 3 medications so 3 IV bags. That took about 1 hour each. But what really killed me was since they are so severe on the kidneys I also had to have between 4-6 bags of just fluid to make sure I peed a ton & kept the kidneys moving to avoid damage. So just the plain fluid took another 4-6 hours. So I was there 8+ hours a day 5 days a week. I wish they would have just let me chug a ton of water or gatorade instead of adding all those extra hours but they wouldn't budge.

Other than that you just have zero energy, all taste buds are gone & you have no apetite anyways. and it's like an extremely bad case of the flu where your whole body aches & you just overall feel like shit. Another thing is I was freezing the entire time. At my apartment I would have heater on high, be wrapped in sweats & a wool blanket, and have a wool cap on & still be freezing. When people came to see me they were sweating lol.

You want to sleep a lot because you feel like shit & are so tired but the body will only take so many hours of sleep per day. So at some point you have to stay awake to be able to sleep

The 3 drugs I was on was:

Bleomycin http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bleomycin

Etoposide http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Etoposide

Cisplatin http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cisplatin


they gave me TONS of other prescriptions to ward off the effects of the chemo drugs but most I didn't take after once or twice. The side effects were not as bad from the chemo as the side effects from the other prescriptions.

And there you are, my point exactly.

If you're not there, you don't know.

hope your better now....

[Angel]

Well...it's been 10 months since diagnosis. He was doing fairly well until this week. Another seizure...the tumour is growing back. His motor skills are still okay, but he can't communicate. Was waiting for him to have a good day so we could talk on the phone. I don't think that's gonna happen now. ..:(

[sadaist]

Well...it's been 10 months since diagnosis. He was doing fairly well until this week. Another seizure...the tumour is growing back. His motor skills are still okay, but he can't communicate. Was waiting for him to have a good day so we could talk on the phone. I don't think that's gonna happen now. ..:(



Dang, I'm sorry Angel. If you still need to get a talk out of your system lemme know & I'll pm you my number.

[vandeleur]

Sorry to hear that angel

[katina]

Angel, I´m sending you lots of positives thoughts and a big hug from here.

[Jérôme Frenchise]

Sorry for your brother and you as well as your family, Angel. Keep strong...

[jhale667]

Sucks to hear, Angel. Sorry. :(

[Angel]

Thanks all. Just trying to see if I can manage to get out there for Canada Day...was going to go in August but not sure if I should wait that long...

[jhale667]

My unsolicited advice - Don't wait. Just in case (invisible sky daddy forbid) you don't get another chance. :(

[Angel]

My unsolicited advice - Don't wait. Just in case (invisible sky daddy forbid) you don't get another chance. :(

My thoughts exactly...

[TFM_Dale]

Well...it's been 10 months since diagnosis. He was doing fairly well until this week. Another seizure...the tumour is growing back. His motor skills are still okay, but he can't communicate. Was waiting for him to have a good day so we could talk on the phone. I don't think that's gonna happen now. ..:(

Sending thoughts and prayers your way.

[Sensible Shoes]

So sorry Angel.

[Angel]

I'm just going to ramble on here a bit. Is it a blog more than a post? Who knows? Who fucking cares?

I want to stand on the highest mountain and scream so loud the entire world can hear me. Or in the lowest valley so that I can hear my scream echoing back at me from all directions. Bounce it off the mountains and catch it in mid-air, and throw it right back at them. We used to do that, Kim and I. Yell as loud as we could...Hellooooo...hellooooo, from Cascade...hellooooo, from Rundle...helloooo, from Sulphur....and a whispered hellooo from Norquay. That's probably where I got my projection from. They love me in the theatre. No matter how big the room or how bad the acoustics, there's never a problem hearing Angel. Thanks, Kim.

When I look at the last post I made in this thread, I realize just how fast the end is coming. No longer does Mom say "oh, he has his good days and his bad". First it was "he can't find his way to the bathroom" (in his own home). Then, he can't walk on his own. But you can sure tell what's weighing on his mind.

Mom tells me this week he's been rubbing his fingers together in the universal sign for money, and with his limited speech ability just repeats "money, money, get, give me, money..."

And why is this? Because of the asshole, don't give a shit about people, just the almighty $, investment firm he used to work for! Fucking scum sucking bastards! In that industry you have a "book of business"...namely the client list and all their investment moola. I guess when Kim joined this firm, he "purchased" the book from a retiring employee. ..with the firms approval, and financial backing. Basically, a loan.

He still owes the firm money for this "purchase", and hasn't been making payments on it because he's sort of, you know, busy dieing from brain cancer...and what the hell, they have "the book". Fucking bastards sent a demand notice for immediate payment.

Screw screaming from mountain tops, somebody get me a baseball bat and a ticket to Toronto. There's a CEO I want to meet...

Thanks for letting me rant... I needed that. I have a feeling this won't be the last.

Sorry to be a downer...

[ashstralia]

that's fucked. i feel terribly sorry for you angel.

try going to a higher authority? the peter principle is real, you know. :rose:

[vandeleur]

That's shit ,sorry Hun

[Seshmeister]

Anyway, Sadist, I'm just rambling...

But even though I'm just a stupid hick cunspiracy nut


:elvis:

Yes you are so go read a fucking book or just shut up with your clueless fucking pretend witchcraft and pyramid scams.

These people have real medical problems and don't need you doing your shill bullshit when they are at their most vulnerable.

The quack cancer cure industry that rip desperate people off at their weakest time are the fucking scum of the earth.

[TFM_Dale]

I'm just going to ramble on here a bit. Is it a blog more than a post? Who knows? Who fucking cares?

I want to stand on the highest mountain and scream so loud the entire world can hear me. Or in the lowest valley so that I can hear my scream echoing back at me from all directions. Bounce it off the mountains and catch it in mid-air, and throw it right back at them. We used to do that, Kim and I. Yell as loud as we could...Hellooooo...hellooooo, from Cascade...hellooooo, from Rundle...helloooo, from Sulphur....and a whispered hellooo from Norquay. That's probably where I got my projection from. They love me in the theatre. No matter how big the room or how bad the acoustics, there's never a problem hearing Angel. Thanks, Kim.

When I look at the last post I made in this thread, I realize just how fast the end is coming. No longer does Mom say "oh, he has his good days and his bad". First it was "he can't find his way to the bathroom" (in his own home). Then, he can't walk on his own. But you can sure tell what's weighing on his mind.

Mom tells me this week he's been rubbing his fingers together in the universal sign for money, and with his limited speech ability just repeats "money, money, get, give me, money..."

And why is this? Because of the asshole, don't give a shit about people, just the almighty $, investment firm he used to work for! Fucking scum sucking bastards! In that industry you have a "book of business"...namely the client list and all their investment moola. I guess when Kim joined this firm, he "purchased" the book from a retiring employee. ..with the firms approval, and financial backing. Basically, a loan.

He still owes the firm money for this "purchase", and hasn't been making payments on it because he's sort of, you know, busy dieing from brain cancer...and what the hell, they have "the book". Fucking bastards sent a demand notice for immediate payment.

Screw screaming from mountain tops, somebody get me a baseball bat and a ticket to Toronto. There's a CEO I want to meet...

Thanks for letting me rant... I needed that. I have a feeling this won't be the last.

Sorry to be a downer...

Very sorry Angel, we are here to rant to anytime you need us.

[ELVIS]

The quack cancer cure industry

Western medicine ??

I agree...

[Angel]

Yes you are so go read a fucking book or just shut up with your clueless fucking pretend witchcraft and pyramid scams.

These people have real medical problems and don't need you doing your shill bullshit when they are at their most vulnerable.

The quack cancer cure industry that rip desperate people off at their weakest time are the fucking scum of the earth.

Ah yes, the infamous "battle/pussy" post. I can tell you this much. People like my brother and Max who choose to fight this dreadful disease are anything but "pussies". Finding survivors of glioblastoma is not an easy task. Less than 5%. The treatments just prolong life.

I know if I was diagnosed with this, I wouldn't have the courage. It would "kick my ass and I would crawl into the corner like a pussy".

Anyway, thanks for the support, all. We may be rather dysfunctional in this little community, but many of you feel like family to me. It's nice to know there's somewhere I can go where everyone knows my name, yet still maintain my brother's privacy. I love you guys. Yes, even you Elvis.

[Seshmeister]

The doctors are fighting the disease, the patient is the battleground.

I'm not sure the whole 'the patient is battling it' language is that useful because it implies that anyone that doesn't make it somehow didn't fight hard enough.

Anyway my thoughts are with you, I think as someone else posted in here many of us have been through something similar and it's shit.

[Angel]

The doctors are fighting the disease, the patient is the battleground.

I'm not sure the whole 'the patient is battling it' language is that useful because it implies that anyone that doesn't make it somehow didn't fight hard enough.

Anyway my thoughts are with you, I think as someone else posted in here many of us have been through something similar and it's shit.

I agree, but I do think he patients attitude has a lot to do with it too. And yeah, it does suck shit. My oldest brother died in a motorcyle accident. Was tough to handle, but not like this. Death is just a big elephant in the room....

[ELVIS]

Does he eat at all ??

[Seshmeister]

Western medicine ??

I agree...

You go girl! :)

[Angel]

Does he eat at all ??

A bit. His gf is really good at making sure he does. Small amounts...

[Angel]

Ugh. This sitting 1000 miles away waiting for the call that "it's time" sucks shit. For everyone's sake, I hope its sooner rather than later.

[PETE'S BROTHER]

damn.

[Von Halen]

This sitting 1000 miles away waiting for the call that "it's time" sucks shit.

Miles, or kilometers? :D

[Angel]

Miles, or kilometers? :D

Miles...I'm old school. ;)

[Sensible Shoes]

Prayers coming your way from me and doggies.

[Igosplut]

Ugh. This sitting 1000 miles away waiting for the call that "it's time" sucks shit. For everyone's sake, I hope its sooner rather than later.

Some (and even you) might have guilty feelings about that thought after the fact, or so might think that this is selfish thought. Far from it. If you haven't been there, people have no idea of the extreme of this illness. On everybody.....

Stay strong.

[Zing!]

Chin up and positive thoughts. Zing said a little prayer and sent it your way.

[Hardrock69]

Sorry to hear of this. Saying "I hope everything works out" sounds sorta crazy, but I know it is no fun being in your situation.

[Angel]

Some (and even you) might have guilty feelings about that thought after the fact, or so might think that this is selfish thought. Far from it. If you haven't been there, people have no idea of the extreme of this illness. On everybody.....

Stay strong.

Yeah, I hesitated saying it because some may not understand. I'm the "lucky" one. I haven't had to witness it. My mom, my other brother and more important his common law wife have been through so much caring for him. There's nothing we can do to heal him, but I so much want them to be able to start to heal.

When I saw him at Christmas, he was just tired a lot, and had no appetite because of the chemo. We went to the Doobie Bros (he bought me a ticket for my 50th birthday), and argued about the same shit we always argue about, it was great! I'm so lucky that he will always be strong when I picture him in my mind. That's the guilt I have to deal with. But I also know that Kim right now would be saying "don't be stupid. What are you going to do, throw away 3 years of University and go back to the old career that you hated just to come here and deal with something you have no control over?"

Like my mom says...it is what it is. Thanks for your support, many of you have been a part of my life, albeit only on the interwebz, for over a decade. Your support means a lot to me.

Now raise your glasses and join me in a toast...to the amazing women that are taking care of him in his final weeks. Patti...I think there's a picturenof her in this thread. STUNNING, and I couldn't ask for a better partner for my brother. His ex-wife Melissa, providing respite care and support for the lovely Patti. And my Mom, always strong...I don't know how she does it. :cheers:

[Never was]

Prayers your way, not wanting someone to suffer more is human not selfish.

Illness impacts to patient and their entire tribe. It is a journey all of go on and all have a unique perspective. The patient feels guilty to take the tribe on the journey the tribe feels guilty they can't do more no matter how hard they want to or how much it breaks their heart.

Make every moment a memory and be kind to yourself.

cheers

[Angel]

Prayers your way, not wanting someone to suffer more is human not selfish.

Illness impacts to patient and their entire tribe. It is a journey all of go on and all have a unique perspective. The patient feels guilty to take the tribe on the journey the tribe feels guilty they can't do more no matter how hard they want to or how much it breaks their heart.

Make every moment a memory and be kind to yourself.

cheers

Thank you. It's so true. Well...off to the Dr. for the stress leave note, and then to drop a class. Just talked to my other brother. Could be tomorrow, could be six weeks from now. Yeah, the bastards blunt. "Do you want to see him alive, or do you want to see him after he's dead"? If you want to see him alive, I suggest you come now. But, his cognitive has really declined this week so he might not know who you are. Damn...what to do? I wish I had a fucking crystal ball!

[PETE'S BROTHER]

what do you WANT to do?

[envy_me]

Thank you. It's so true. Well...off to the Dr. for the stress leave note, and then to drop a class. Just talked to my other brother. Could be tomorrow, could be six weeks from now. Yeah, the bastards blunt. "Do you want to see him alive, or do you want to see him after he's dead"? If you want to see him alive, I suggest you come now. But, his cognitive has really declined this week so he might not know who you are. Damn...what to do? I wish I had a fucking crystal ball!

Go and see him while you have the chance.

[TFM_Dale]

Whatever you decide our prayers are with you.

[Angel]

what do you WANT to do?

Go back in time and not let this happen...

[PETE'S BROTHER]

Go back in time and not let this happen...

fair enough, hon. :love0072:

[Never was]

Go, it may help with healing and closure but remember your memories and mark you guys leave on each other are formed over a lifetime not the quality of the good bye. Be kind to yourself, and allow yourself time and permission to be all over the place emotionally for awhile, its a process not an event.

[Von Halen]

Tough call Angel. Go with your gut. If it's telling you to get your ass there, then get your ass there. If it is telling you to wait, then wait. You have to be leaning one way or the other. Just have no regrets.

It sucks to have to go through this shit. Makes me (and I'm sure you) wonder what it's all about.

[WACF]

Tough one Angel...especially when you are taking classes are trying to get ahead.

You need to follow that little voice...do what you know you can live with.

Nothing worse than regrets...

Best wishes your way.

[LoungeMachine]

No one can make the decision but you, Angel....

But as we all have experienced, regret really sucks.

I can't imagine you regretting making the trip. Nor would anyone else.

Best wishes.

[jhale667]

Sucks. To add my unsolicited opinion - I too think you should go. Agree, you'll regret NOT going more than you could ever possibly regret making the trip. Best wishes for a peaceful transition.

[Matt White]

God Speed Angel............

From somebody who has lost a number of loved ones.....I'd go

Prayers and best wishes

[katina]

Sorry to hear this, Angel. Prayers and a big hug from here.

I think you should go.

[Angel]

One sign of another rapid decline, and I'm on my way. Getting my poop in a group the next couple of days in preparation.

[Angel]

The shit is hitting the fan...and it's being flung by his common law wife. What a bitch she's turned out to be. Total control freak. He's in the palliative unit now because she couldn't care for him at home anymore. Claimed she didn't have any help. Yeah ok...that's why his ex-wife took an unpaid leave of absence and so did our other bro. She had plenty of help, but hey...it's tough, we understand and fully supported her decision.

The Dr asked what Kim enjoyed doing when he was well. Mom told him about his diving so the Dr suggested they take him to the beach. Told his gf they were going to do it on Sunday. Borrowed a van with a wheelchair lift, packed a nice picnic. Get there to be told she brought lasagna for supper and she doesn't think it's a good idea.

Every day she finds a way to make my Mom and Aunt wait at least an hour before they can see him. My mom's too scared to say anything in case she bans her from the hospital. My cousin is driving out there today to help them out.

I'm waiting till the end. I spent two weeks with him at Christmas to say my goodbyes, and I'm okay with that. I'll be there at the end, and then I'll make damn sure the family door is slammed in her face. My mother is losing a child. No mother should have to face that, and this is her second time. That cunt has made this even more difficult for my mother, and for that she will pay.

Plus, she's not thinking of my brother, only ways she can cause more stress for his mother. Fucking control freak. If he was cognizant of what's going on around him, he'd be kicking her ass to the ground. She's going to be grieving by herself when he's gone...nobody in his family will have fuck all to do with her. And she won't be welcome at any celebrations of his life either.

And with all that said, now is the time for me to say see ya later. The mood I'm in I'd best be staying off the boards for a bit...

[sadaist]

. The mood I'm in I'd best be staying off the boards for a bit...



I think just the opposite Angel. Better you vent here instead of bashing in this bitches face and going to jail. How will you post from jail huh? Well, I can't say I understand your situation because, as family issues typically are, yours is very complex. Shake off what you can and tell the people who need it to fuck off.

Be strong. And keep venting here. It's healthy to get it out plus you can go back & re-read sometime in case you forget pieces. Like your online journal of RAWR!

Anyways, good luck. My thoughts go out to you & yours.

[katina]

I totally agree with Sada. Angel, keep venting here, it will be good for you. All the sadness, frustration and stress could damage your health.

Stay online Angel, and write whatever you want .
My prayers are with you, yor mother and family. :daisy:

[Angel]

Thx guys...I should maybe stay out of the war room though...nah, get it out. ;)

[Angel]

FUCK! Had to drop a class due to stress/anxiety. It was a really heavy class that was hitting too close to home. Dropping it resulted in me being classified as part-time instead of full. So, I now have a 1400 overpayment which will be deducted from my loans next term...and I don't get my usual 730.00 from student finance this month. Add the wages I'll lose when I have to go home and basically....I'm fucked....

Vent vent vent. Fuck it, my hat is out, lol. Fundraising links are on my FB page if anyone feels so inclined...like they say, desperate times call for desperate measures...

[sadaist]

Vent vent vent. Fuck it, my hat is out, lol. Fundraising links are on my FB page if anyone feels so inclined...like they say, desperate times call for desperate measures...



Whats your FB? Actually just find me on there. It's a fake cause I like to keep my anonymity but the name is Daffney Velen. She's my little terror gnome from Warcraft.

[Never was]

Angel can you send me a link to the FB page, thanks

cheers,
Liam

[Never was]

If everyone in this thread donated a few bucks it would fill a lot of the hole, just saying people. Been so many negative vibes here's a chance to create a few positive ones.

[katina]

:love0008:

[Angel]

Thanks everyone. Fuck, talk about bad vibes....this shit just never fucking ends. Little did we realize that my boyfriends girlfriend was the bitch from hell. :mad:

The games she's playing with my Mom put anyone on this board to shame. You know it's bad when all the hospital staff can say is we're so sorry for what your family is going through...and they're not talking about losing a family member to brain cancer. :(

Everyone in the family agrees it's best I'm not there until the end...whenever that may be. His body is so damn strong! Of course, this is a guy that could ride his bike over 100 miles in the mountains in less than a day. He could have a stroke and go anytime...or keep going as he is for months. Fuck I wish it could be sooner rather than later. I'm so worried about my Mom. She's already lost one son and a husband.

That bitch is going to pay for what she's doing to my family. If she'd shown this side when he was still cognizant, she'd be on the curb. Her power of attorney ends upon death. Good thing she's a tiny thing. It'll be that much easier to throw her out the fucking door...

[Angel]

Man, poor guy...this is dragging on forever!!! I must say, if I was ever diagnosed with this monster, I'd say no fucking treatment!!!

What a horrible way to spend your last year on this earth!!!

[Angel]

God damn fucking spammers! Let me find them and I'll take care of them permanently!!! Grrrrr....

It's time...

[Angel]

My brother passed peacefully last night. Shortly after I told him it was okay for him to go, he breathed his last breath. Thank you everyone for your support. My Roth family...

[vandeleur]

Angel am very sorry to hear that . Hope your ok and my thoughts are with you and your family .

[PETE'S BROTHER]

glad he is at peace..sorry for your hurt. walk away from the lady you hate...

[envy_me]

I am sorry for your loss, Angel. My condolences.

At least he isn't suffering anymore. Maybe that is some comfort in a tragic situation.

[Von Halen]

My brother passed peacefully last night.

Sorry for your loss Angel.

[Sweet Irony]

Im very sorry as well....(((((Angel))))) Hang in there...xoxo

[Zing!]

Very sorry for you Angel - positive vibes your way.

[Nickdfresh]

This is what I didn't want to read today. My deepest condolences Angel and all the best to your family in this difficult time...

[WACF]

Glad you got to have some last words...I am sure that meant the world to him.

[katina]

Angel, I´m very sorry to hear that, he is at peace now. My deepest condolences.

[Angel]

*Eagle represents a state of grace that is reached through inner work, understanding and passing the initiation tests that result from reclaiming our personal power. Eagle Medicine is the Power of the Great Spirit. It is the spirit of tenacity. It is the gift of clear vision with which one can truly see the things one sees. It is the patience to wait for the appropriate moment. It is to live in balance with heaven and earth. Eagle reminds us of our connection with the Great Spirit. It tells us that the universe is giving us the opportunity to fly above our life's worldly levels, or above the shadow of past realities. Eagle teaches us to look above in order to touch Grandfather Sun with our heart, to love the Shadow as much as the Light. Eagle asks us to grant ourselves permission to be free in order to reach the joy that our heart desires.*

When I arrived at Mom's this morning, a bald eagle was circling overhead. Kim and I once went searching for a bald eagle's nest...and ended up hiding under our boat when they went after us because we were too close to their nest.

How fitting that I got to sit and watch that eagle soar this morning...

[jhale667]

Sorry to hear, Angel...deepest condolences. At least you can take some comfort in knowing he's not suffering any more.

[Sensible Shoes]

So sorry Angel. May good memories sustain you.

[diamondsgirl]

Angel... I don't post all that much anymore but have read this thread and my heart breaks for you. I truly hope that you find peace and allow time to heal your pain. Throw me a PM if you want to talk, rant, whatever...:love0066: ~ Susan

[fraroc]

*Eagle represents a state of grace that is reached through inner work, understanding and passing the initiation tests that result from reclaiming our personal power. Eagle Medicine is the Power of the Great Spirit. It is the spirit of tenacity. It is the gift of clear vision with which one can truly see the things one sees. It is the patience to wait for the appropriate moment. It is to live in balance with heaven and earth. Eagle reminds us of our connection with the Great Spirit. It tells us that the universe is giving us the opportunity to fly above our life's worldly levels, or above the shadow of past realities. Eagle teaches us to look above in order to touch Grandfather Sun with our heart, to love the Shadow as much as the Light. Eagle asks us to grant ourselves permission to be free in order to reach the joy that our heart desires.*

When I arrived at Mom's this morning, a bald eagle was circling overhead. Kim and I once went searching for a bald eagle's nest...and ended up hiding under our boat when they went after us because we were too close to their nest.

How fitting that I got to sit and watch that eagle soar this morning...


Sorry to hear about your loss, babe :( When my grandfather passed on in 2010, it was just so heavy duty on my family, but I was comforted in the fact that especially because he is no longer suffering, I now feel like he's always with me now that he's passed...

[Guitar Shark]

You are in my thoughts, Angel. Remember the good times.

[FORD]

*Eagle represents a state of grace that is reached through inner work, understanding and passing the initiation tests that result from reclaiming our personal power. Eagle Medicine is the Power of the Great Spirit. It is the spirit of tenacity. It is the gift of clear vision with which one can truly see the things one sees. It is the patience to wait for the appropriate moment. It is to live in balance with heaven and earth. Eagle reminds us of our connection with the Great Spirit. It tells us that the universe is giving us the opportunity to fly above our life's worldly levels, or above the shadow of past realities. Eagle teaches us to look above in order to touch Grandfather Sun with our heart, to love the Shadow as much as the Light. Eagle asks us to grant ourselves permission to be free in order to reach the joy that our heart desires.*

When I arrived at Mom's this morning, a bald eagle was circling overhead. Kim and I once went searching for a bald eagle's nest...and ended up hiding under our boat when they went after us because we were too close to their nest.

How fitting that I got to sit and watch that eagle soar this morning...

I remember I was walking in my neighborhood one afternoon in 2003, and saw a bald eagle circling overhead. I thought it was a bit strange, as it's not usual to see them in the city limits. A teaching on eagle medicine similar to what you posted here came to me, and I knew it had to mean something. Then when I got home, the phone rang not even two minutes later and I was told my grandmother had passed away. Somehow it just made sense......

Like with your brother, it wasn't exactly unexpected, as she had been ill for sometime. But it's the kind of news we're never really ready to hear. I did get to spend the previous Christmas with her, knowing full well it would probably be the last time I saw her. I know you were talking about seeing your brother, and I hope you had the chance to do that, but even if you weren't physically there, you got to talk to him, and say your goodbyes.

Anyway, I hope anything I said here made sense.... I've probably deleted and re-typed this about 20 times because words usually fail me at times like these.

I'm not going to hijack your thread by getting into the kind of month I've had with family medical stuff, but I'll just say I think Mick & Keith had it right, way back in 1966.....

What a drag it is getting old.......

[Igosplut]

No words really do justice to how it all plays out. It just flat out sucks, and there's nothing you can do but try to put in a place you can handle. It's been said that the person that passes has the easier time as it's over for them....But not for you. Just as funerals are not for the dead, but for the living. Never an easy journey, but one you must travel regardless. Hope it's smooth for your sake.

[sadaist]

My brother passed peacefully last night. Shortly after I told him it was okay for him to go, he breathed his last breath. Thank you everyone for your support. My Roth family...


So sorry Im a couple days late here. :( No matter how much you think you are prepared.....you are not prepared. I wish I could give you a big hug & let you cry on my shoulder. All of us here do. We really care for you & this thread has touched most of us. Thank you for sharing such a deeply personal & tragic experience. I hope on my next tragedy I live through, that I am able to pull some strength from what you have shown us all here.

Take care Angel,

Mike

[Angel]

Thank you, everyone. I can't wait for life to get back to normal. I hate this shit.

[Angel]

Angel... I don't post all that much anymore but have read this thread and my heart breaks for you. I truly hope that you find peace and allow time to heal your pain. Throw me a PM if you want to talk, rant, whatever...:love0066: ~ Susan

Oh honey...I've thought about you soooo much for the past year! Huge hugs to you. xoxoxo

[Angel]

Thank you, everyone. I can't wait for life to get back to normal. I hate this shit.

Starting to think this may never happen....I think I'm moving into a cardboard box when I get back home...

[Angel]

Wow. Quite the thread to read through. This baby can be locked up now...

[Never was]

Angel, all my prayers and condolences. Be kind to yourself, celebrate the memories, and don't define the journey by a single till we meet again.

Hang in there luv and doesn't feel that way now you will again rise

cheers,
Liam