Something about Eddie.

[John Holmes]

A friend o'mine who works in porno as me, has contacted me late this morning through e-mail, with a nice story about Ed.

He told me that, after the Hartford show, he met Eddie in a bar, along with his brother Al, relaxing after the concert.

Mike came thereafter but Sam was missing. Anyway, my friend, who was pretty smashed by that hour, decided to approach Eddie when he was left alone at the table, and talk to him about music and stuff.

Apparently Eddie was uninterested in talking about music, but was interested in something else and has invited my pal over and over again to stay close to him and the band in many occasions, since then. Here's an excerpt from the e-mail I received from my friend:

----

Hi John,

Just wanted you to know how nice this Eddie fella is in person. Last night, he dressed up as schoolgirl and I spanked him again while he sang "Why Can't this be love". (Eddie makes me dress up in blackface when I fuck him.)

Eddie looks pretty good in lace undies and bra, you know. And this time, when I fucked him in the ass, I didn't have to rope him like before; he really liked it. Even asked me to come in his mouth. (Thats not exactly safe sex, how is it with a cancered mouth also?)

Eddie's ex-wife is pretty beastly, to be honest, but she got in on the action too. She explained to me that that strange smell around Eddie is not a hygene problem as I suspected but that he has been having trouble controlling his bowels lately since so many men have had him rectally against his will when he was drunk.

One thing not very attractive about Eddie, though, his relationship with his big dog "Mack". The dogs getting kinda old and having a hard time licking his nuts, so he has trained Eddie to lick his nuts for him. Seems odd to me, but Eddie likes it so who am I to say? Your kink is just not my kink, right?

[Bill Lumbergh]

"This is untrue.............Ed likes to be drenched in piss and syrup, THEN and only then will he allow himself to be fucked in the ass by someone in blackface. Who knows though maybe he has matured since the divorce?!"

[Bill Lumbergh]

Ed at the AVN awards accepting his "NO BALLS" award........

[John Holmes]

http://images.forbes.com/images/2002/07/12/movers_vanhalen_200x200.jpg

Here is he, wandering proudly in a pal's farm, joint in mouth. He'd just won a strenuous fight against hemorroids after being extensively rectally abused by a rodeo Bull.

A picture of Mick, the bull who'd helped Eddie:

http://www.cvm.okstate.edu/courses/vmed5412/ruminant%20images/rodeo%20bull.jpg

[scottydabodi]

You guys got my VOTE!!! Damn....

[Bill Lumbergh]

Originally posted by scottydabodi
You guys got my VOTE!!! Damn....

:cool:

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by Bill Lumbergh
"This is untrue.............Ed likes to be drenched in piss and syrup, THEN and only then will he allow himself to be fucked in the ass by someone in blackface. Who knows though maybe he has matured since the divorce?!" why are you always talking about male ass? i figured you for a jerk off but i know now your a fudge packer also sheep boy. it is you that likes to be pissed on and dressed like a bitch in heat. now go find the corner in the round room sheep boy. then clean out your cunt bitch. you know you do not have a dick becuse your a bitch. and if you say you do spit the mother fucker out it is not yours sheep boy.......

[Bill Lumbergh]

Dude these must be YOUR sick fantasies or something. Go back through my posts I'm sure you'll find very few if any posts on that subject. Man it's just amazing how the sheep fixate on gay sex. You probably unzipped your pants immediately when that new promo photo of Van Hagar came out. Speaking of coming out, how did your parents react?!

[Terry]

Originally posted by Bill Lumbergh
Dude these must be YOUR sick fantasies or something. Go back through my posts I'm sure you'll find very few if any posts on that subject. Man it's just amazing how the sheep fixate on gay sex. You probably unzipped your pants immediately when that new promo photo of Van Hagar came out. Speaking of coming out, how did your parents react?!

Lumb, a note of thanks.......you're one of the few here that makes me laugh out loud.

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by Bill Lumbergh
Dude these must be YOUR sick fantasies or something. Go back through my posts I'm sure you'll find very few if any posts on that subject. Man it's just amazing how the sheep fixate on gay sex. You probably unzipped your pants immediately when that new promo photo of Van Hagar came out. Speaking of coming out, how did your parents react?! every time you post shit you are always talking about ed and sam what they wear . and about there ass and all that other shit you fags talk about. and every one here seen the pic of you with your face on sams dick trying to get free tic for one of the shows. how did your parents react. when they seen the pic of you trying to suck dick for a free tic. now go find the corner in the round room and clean your cunt sheep. fixate on that sheep......

[tjvhou812]

Originally posted by Bill Lumbergh
Ed at the AVN awards accepting his "NO BALLS" award........

the reason it looked like ed had no balls biil, was becuase they where on your chin....

so stop runnin your mouth blower..you fuckin woman

[rustoffa]

Originally posted by tjvhou812
the reason it looked like ed had no balls biil, was becuase they where on your chin....

so stop runnin your mouth blower..you fuckin woman
http://www.eden.rutgers.edu/~pstuart/images/bjoel.jpg

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by Bill Lumbergh
Dude these must be YOUR sick fantasies or something. Go back through my posts I'm sure you'll find very few if any posts on that subject. Man it's just amazing how the sheep fixate on gay sex. You probably unzipped your pants immediately when that new promo photo of Van Hagar came out. Speaking of coming out, how did your parents react?! i told you every one knows you like the dick. more sammy dick then any other you talk about the guy so much it sounds like you want him to poke your shiter. go find the corner in the round room sheep boy.

[rustoffa]

Originally posted by rockvanhalen66
i told you every one knows you like the dick. more sammy dick then any other you talk about the guy so much it sounds like you want him to poke your shiter. go find the corner in the round room sheep boy.

You ever watched that home shopping channel? They sell butcher
knives occasionally.

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by rustoffa
You ever watched that home shopping channel? They sell butcher
knives occasionally. why you want to buy some send your money......

[rustoffa]

Originally posted by rockvanhalen66
why you want to buy some send your money......

Not for me bro, I was kinda insinuating you could chop your
fingers off if you bought one or some shit.

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by rustoffa
Not for me bro, I was kinda insinuating you could chop your
fingers off if you bought one or some shit. now why would i follow your foot steps when i can lead. im just insinuating you already chop off your fingers.. bro/////

[rustoffa]

Originally posted by rockvanhalen66
now why would i follow your foot steps when i can lead. im just insinuating you already chop off your fingers.. bro/////

Are you fucking indonesian or something? It's like reading a
fucking tard blog. CHOP YOUR FINGERS OFF. Look up at the
sky sabu....the stars say to CHOP YOUR FUCKING FINGERS OFF.
Eeeksie deeksie oblah dee?

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by rustoffa
You ever watched that home shopping channel? They sell butcher
knives occasionally. are you a fucking tard or what . we dont care that your mother chop off your fingers. ok sheep boy

[rustoffa]

Anyone?

[tjvhou812]

Originally posted by rustoffa
Anyone?

yea, stop sucking dick
crustoffa

with a name like crustoffa
its gotta be smuckers

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by rustoffa
Anyone? anyone ? well no one here for you sheep. so back to jerking off on your mothers shit hole.

[tjvhou812]

Originally posted by rustoffa
Anyone?

go wipe the crustoffa your teeth

[rustoffa]

Originally posted by rockvanhalen66
anyone ? well no one here for you sheep.

It'll get busier in a minute bro.......*crickets*
Oh well, say another insult or something.

[tjvhou812]

Originally posted by rustoffa
It'll get busier in a minute bro.......*crickets*
Oh well, say another insult or something.

you suck so much fucking dick, your lips are smoking

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by rustoffa
It'll get busier in a minute bro.......*crickets*
Oh well, say another insult or something. hey crust maybe if you stop giving shit to the bros in here they would stop your mother from giving head. to your grandfather.

[rustoffa]

Originally posted by rockvanhalen66
hey crust maybe if you stop giving shit to the bros in here they would stop your mother from giving head. to your grandfather.

You want me to stop?

[rustoffa]

tell me more bitch.

[tjvhou812]

Originally posted by rustoffa
tell me more bitch.

stop runnin your pole smoker

[tjvhou812]

Originally posted by rustoffa
You want me to stop?

first off your a shitty moderator,
you come on here and start shit,

nobody was fucking w/you until you started runnin your mouth blower

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by rustoffa
You want me to stop? hey crust take your dick out of your mothers ass and put the gun down.

[rustoffa]

Originally posted by tjvhou812
first off your a shitty moderator,
you come on here and start shit,

nobody was fucking w/you until you started runnin your mouth blower

Send a complaint to the front desk.....yeah, I start shit. I've seen
enough of your fucking vapid crap to last a lifetime. Maybe
you'll catch a break tomorrow. Right now I'm playing UNO so fuck off.

[tjvhou812]

Originally posted by rustoffa
Send a complaint to the front desk.....yeah, I start shit. I've seen
enough of your fucking vapid crap to last a lifetime. Maybe
you'll catch a break tomorrow. Right now I'm playing UNO so fuck off.

well you wont be catching any breaks...

go shave your fucking pussy,
on hot days like this the people around you can smell it

you fucking dick jockey

[rustoffa]

Originally posted by tjvhou812
well you wont be catching any breaks...

go shave your fucking pussy,
on hot days like this the people around you can smell it

you fucking dick jockey

Do me a favor, don't send any breaks my way. You've
put yourself firmly in the number one rascal chair. How
does it feel to be a test tube monkey broham? You
bought right into my schtick and failed miserably. The
pain in your neck has nothing to do with the traces.
No mother jokes, no zoloft, no nothing. You're owned.
YOU'RE OWNED. Look up by the sign.

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by rustoffa
You want me to stop? hey crust this is your last warning stop pumping your mothers ass and put the fucking gun down......

[BIGBADZERO]

Another retarded thread started by a retarded Rothtard.

How retarded.

[guwapo_rocker]

Originally posted by rockvanhalen66
hey crust this is your last warning stop pumping your mothers ass and put the fucking gun down......

Hey RVH66 (Learning to Write) Why don't you pick up a gun,

put the barrel in your mouth and pull the fucking trigger.

Don't bother leaving a note, nobody would understand it

anyway.

Headline: Illiterate RVH66 blows head off, no brain matter

found.

[BARE BONE]

I found a picture of tjvhou812, rockvanhalen66, Augustblue and Kidvegas hanging out.

[BARE BONE]

I also found a picture of Spammy at what he does best.

[Roth kills Sam]

Originally posted by BARE BONE
I also found a picture of Spammy at what he does best.

I thought what Spermy Gaybar did best had something to do with Eddie Van Heineken, a jar of Vaseline, rubber gloves, a few beers, and a gerbil?

[scottydabodi]

ATTENTION RVH66, RUSTOFFA ROCKS, and Saddam says

[azcrdnal]

Originally posted by tjvhou812
the reason it looked like ed had no balls biil, was becuase they where on your chin....

so stop runnin your mouth blower..you fuckin woman fuck you pussy go back to the links brett.

[Matt White]

The sheep do add a bit of tragic comedy, not unlike the leemings at the edge of the clift. Its hysterical that they feel compeled to come to a site dedicated to VAN HALEN'S lead singer DAVID LEE ROTH and spout their mindless word-drool about Spammy. Youngsters who missed out and hair-metal lovers who were always intimidated by DIAMOND DAVE! It does make an old VAN HALEN fan pine that much more for the old days.........when nerds and newwave lovin' pussies got pummeled for not giving THE MIGHTY VAN HALEN their due!!!!!

[rockvanhalen66]

Originally posted by guwapo_rocker
Hey RVH66 (Learning to Write) Why don't you pick up a gun,

put the barrel in your mouth and pull the fucking trigger.

Don't bother leaving a note, nobody would understand it

anyway.

Headline: Illiterate RVH66 blows head off, no brain matter

found. hey guwapo the cock rocker you understand what i write. i was just starting to think you might be a no shit dude. but i guess not your just a bitch go clean your cunt bitch. like you have anything to post that makes sense. wake the fuck up. seep boy.......