3 bullets in the chamber...

[WARF]

3 bullets... 4 band members...

Who do you let live?

I'll put a cap in Alex, Sammy and Eddie's ass...

and let the fucking "YES MAN" live...

So he can sell his shitty ass "autographed" hot sauce...

for $189.00 a bottle...

[Figs]

Alex and Sammy are no-brainers. But I'm still a fan of Ed the guitar player, maybe without Alex around he'd be a different person who makes more of his own decisions.

[JCOOK]

I shoot Roy three times and pistol whip the sisters for what theyve' done

[WARF]

Lol, I should have made an option.... all three bullets for hagar... and pistol whip the brothers!!!! lmao!!!

[LoungeMachine]

Too easy.

I line up the sisters and mikey head to head to head, and kill 3 chumps with one cap.

I take the second, and but it square in flabby's gut, and watch him bleed out slowly.

I take the third, and use it on John Ashcroft.



Oh my god, did I just say all that outloud?

I'm a peacenik. Never owned or fired a gun. hate them.

Guess we all have issues unresolved



Note to FBI The preceeding was a dramatization, and in no way reflects any plan to knock off our corrupt, and morally bankrupt AG

It was humor.

[WARF]

Wait...

I'll put one bullet in Eddie...

One bullet on alex...

and use the third one for myself after the police come!!!

[JCOOK]

Can i have some more bulletts this fat sonofabitch wont die

[moose]

Originally posted by JCOOK
Can i have some more bulletts this fat sonofabitch wont die

Use a 470 Nitro Express, packs a shitload of fpp's knock down an elephant no problem. Oh make sure the bullet you use is an A-Square solid at 500 grains. Virtually unstoppable.

[BRANDON]

i wouldn't even waste a bullet on those pieces of shit.

[WARF]

I know... the whole Van Halen debate seems to be a waste of time...

They all fucked up the legacy.... everyone is responsible.... even Dave!

[badhorsie]

How could have the legacy been preserverved when a member of the band is no longer in the band?

[JCOOK]

Fired six of them into him MOOSE and the cocksucker is still squirming

[lms2]

Originally posted by WARF
I know... the whole Van Halen debate seems to be a waste of time...

They all fucked up the legacy.... everyone is responsible.... even Dave!

Warf, I saw your post at the sheep pen, and now this. Poor guy, is it the stress thats doin it to ya?

[lms2]

Originally posted by JCOOK
I shoot Roy three times and pistol whip the sisters for what theyve' done

Good answer. I concur. Warf, if you would have made this an option, I could have voted.

What the heck, I am a lousy shot anyway. I would aim all three at Spam and still miss. (Im a softy too.)

[WARF]

Yes, i'm stressed out. LOL

I don't really wanna kill any of the Van Halen members.

But I do stand by my PEN post... I did think the Boston Pops was terrible! Nothing worse than DLR singin' with those old people....

[badhorsie]

He didnt even sing the song all that great either Warf.

He looked good though .

[WARF]

Well this is my opinion... I believe their are Eddie Sheep.. as well as Dave sheep... but I stray somewhere in the middle! I think it's called being realistic. I can point out DLR's faults... just as much as blame Eddie for the mistakes that eventually led to the downfall of Van Halen or David Lee Roth's solo career! My solution to the problem would be to blame both parties.

Dave is impossible to work with.... the only person he never fired... was Jason Becker... and that's because he became ill with ALS... before having a chance to be fired! LOL

I hated the Boston Pops... although I do agree Dave looked good... it was very cheesy to see him onstage with a bunch of old motherfuckers... while a TRAILOR TRASH/MULLET crowd.... sang depressively the long forgot chorus to jump... I don't know if it's just me... but Dave doesn't look right doing JUMPS... with dress pants and suspenders!!!

[badhorsie]

I'm a fan of Eddie and I'm a fan of Dave and they arent perfect human beings. I enjoy most of the work they have done seperately and i enjoy the work they did together.

He did look goofy wearing those clothes and doing the jumps but he looked good the rest of the way.

Poor Jason didnt get the chance to quit or get the boot ! :(:(:(:(

[WARF]

Jason would have been fired... just like everyone else!

Dave needs to get his band in the studio and record original material.

I think they are decent enough to get their shit together.

If anything, I'd like to see Brian Young make something original.

Diamond Dave was just too many covers... and I wanted more shit like THUG POP!!!

[badhorsie]

I dont see why they cant write anything original.

MAKE SOMETHING NEW

[freak]

All you need is one bullet.

*KABAAAM*

*thud*

*Chanber next round*

"Alex, one word out of you and I lighten the load your neck has to carry. Behind the kit...Now!"

"Eddie, stop being a support group pussy and play your guitar!"

"Mike, toss Sammy in the dumpster and get DLR on the phone."

[lms2]

Agreed about the covers, and agreed about the dave sheep thing, but don't tell anyone here I said that. I defend Ed, Al and Mikey too much as it is.

I put a post in someone's thread, don't know if was yours or not, about Eddie being "too human" and sharing too much misery. Dave goes overboard the other way. If the two could just meet in the middle and get along on stage, then embrace their opposites to combine creative forces, they would still kick ass.

[WARF]

Originally posted by badhorsie
I dont see why they cant write anything original.

MAKE SOMETHING NEW

Seriously man!

Dave is cheapening his material, with the Las Vegas routine.

I want a fucking rock album!!

[lms2]

I am okay if he wants to do the vegas thing, and even the smaller shows don't bother me, more personal, and all... but they are kind of like the EMT thing. A side line. He needs to hit the main course hard and heavy every now and then as well. But what the hell.

DAVE OR THE GRAVE

[LoungeMachine]

Originally posted by freak
All you need is one bullet.

*KABAAAM*

*thud*

*Chanber next round*

"Alex, one word out of you and I lighten the load your neck has to carry. Behind the kit...Now!"

"Eddie, stop being a support group pussy and play your guitar!"

"Mike, toss Sammy in the dumpster and get DLR on the phone."

Fucking Classic

best post i've read in months

hands down

Fucking Classic

[WARF]

Hell yeah... awesome post FREAK!!!!

[moose]

Originally posted by JCOOK
Fired six of them into him MOOSE and the cocksucker is still squirming

Go to the 600 Nitro if that doen't work ask Senetor Kerry(SIC) if he becomes Prez if he can launch a nuclear attack on that fat fuck spam in defense of America?

[bueno bob]

God, what a tough question!

I had to go with Mike...he's actually done the LEAST to fuck up Van Halen over the years (other than saying "Yes" to any question put to him), so he's allowed to breathe...until I reload, anyway...

[lms2]

Originally posted by freak
All you need is one bullet.

*KABAAAM*

*thud*

*Chanber next round*

"Alex, one word out of you and I lighten the load your neck has to carry. Behind the kit...Now!"

Freak, you're okay kid. I thought I already voted for ya, but I guess I didn't. I just fixed that and look forward to more of your posts. :D

"Eddie, stop being a support group pussy and play your guitar!"

"Mike, toss Sammy in the dumpster and get DLR on the phone."

[Don Corleone]

I say save Ed (with his drunken breath the bullet would vere off course any way). Without shep, chances are he'd be on the phone to Dave inside of 10 minutes.

[BigDaddyD]

I let Sammy live. As much as he sucks in VH, I had to give it to Alex for being a dumb cunt, EVH for fucking up the greatest band ever as well as himself, and Mike for being such a pussy and going along with it. There is nothing I hate more than people that are afraid to "get in the middle" of shit, even if it is the right thing to do. Besides, Mike needs to be shot for his fucking Ultracrap bass solo that he has been torturing VH fans with for decades. Sammy is the least douche in the band. That is not saying much.

[lms2]

Spam is the most expendable. Some of us secretly wish for a real reunion which requires the other three be left alive, and that Spam be out of the way.

[BigDaddyD]

That is my choice bro. I won't hold my breath for a reunion. I would be the first in line, but I have doubts that if it happens, it would be any good. They suck now. They would need some serious practice before Dave could do anything with them. Also, no matter how good they could be, they can NEVER be like they were in their 20s...just can't happen.

[lms2]

Agreed. But old age has its merits. I still would like to see what they could do. Plus, I just hate the rift between them. It takes enjoyment out of music and memories dear to my heart. Fuck it. I don't care if they are as good as they used to be, just would like to see them not so angry anymore, and for them to give Dave his credit, and the four them get inducted into the hall of fame....and I want a horsie, and a ...

Anyway, its just not right.

[FORD]

Ah Hell, let's spare Mikey. Then he can join Dave, Brian, and Ray and become the best Van Halen lineup since 1985.

[Don Corleone]

Would anyone really care if Mike wasn't there?

[freak]

Originally posted by Don Corleone
Would anyone really care if Mike wasn't there?

The Van Halen sound wouldn't be there if Mike wasn't. There'd be a big hole in the background vocals.

[ClubDave]

first of all, im disgusted seeing as how i read the poll results and i believe it says 2 people would let roy live if they went through with this.......here is how i would do it

ClubDave is standing in a room with his gun pointed at the bastards.......he is telling them how bad they fucked up the legacy.....suddenly he fires a shot right at sammy hagar's johnson, and hagar cowers in pain.........the brothers are crying while mike has a look of disbelief on his face........suddenly another shot rings and hagar falls down dead........than a knock comes at the door and gary cherone walks in with a note saying to show up at this location........POP!!!!!!cherone is dead........there is only one lead singer left in van halen and the boys know what to do.......VH reunion, everyone lives happily ever after

[Davidsgrl]

Originally posted by Figs
Alex and Sammy are no-brainers. But I'm still a fan of Ed the guitar player, maybe without Alex around he'd be a different person who makes more of his own decisions.

Exactly!!!

[TwoFoolsAMinute]

Sam Roy Lives, Without Van Halen, he's nobody!

[WARF]

Let the polls resume!

[rikredbrain]

why kill them? they all look half dead anyhow.....

and personally i liked the diamond dave album ok it was cover heavy.. but it was an album for himself.... he seems to genuinely try new stuff... and hes gettin to old fer all that rockin out now.. a more laid back aproach is good fer me

[rustoffa]

Ed would survive.

On a lighter note, it'd be fun to just obliterate all four for like 2 hours with fully automatic paintball guns, loaded with red and yellow paint.

Oh yeah, and use the stink-bomb ammo.

[cwsmith17]

Originally posted by WARF
3 bullets... 4 band members...

Who do you let live?

I'll put a cap in Alex, Sammy and Eddie's ass...

and let the fucking "YES MAN" live...

So he can sell his shitty ass "autographed" hot sauce...

for $189.00 a bottle...

I let Alex, Ed and Michael Anthony live!!!!

I then pistol whip Ed for being a whiny bitch, hit Alex in the neck and

then bitch slap Mike.

I then put one bullet in each of Shlammy's buttcheeks then I give him one straight to the Poodle!!!

[tjvhou812]

give me three bullets

and hanson would disapear

[SammySucks1984]

Warf i disagree eddie is what made dave sound good and vice versa

[Terry]

Love how Alex got the fewest votes!

Of course Ed gets a pass. He's the only one out of the four I have any hopes of in terms of their future output rocking my world. I think if he decided to work without Alex and Mike and got some new players pumping out the rhythm behind him, EVH could possibly start coming up with some stuff that didn't sound like an EVH clone wanking in a Sam Ash with a locking-tremolo axe he wished he knew how to play. Al and Mike in the background seems to inspire Ed to play-by-numbers, and this has been the case since Roth left the band. If he were put into a context where he wasn't looked upon as he musical leader of the band, and into the ring with a drummer and bassist who pushed him to come up with some good shit, Ed might make an effort, if only to impress them. That was part of his chemistry with Dave; those two were constantly engaging in one-upsmanship.

[WARF]

POP! POP! POP!

[Dave's PA Rental]

damn, I missed this the first time around...

good stuff...

someone on the first page said he would pop Sammy three times and then pistol whip Alex...that's fucking fantastic!

[WARF]

I'm hearing alot of fireworks right now... reminded me of this thread!
Sounds like gun shots...
carry on gentlemen...

[Unchainme]

Let Ed live, he is still salvalgable. (Yes I spelled It wrong I Know.) and they could have a Dave and Ed tour.

[diamondsgirl]

I agree that knocking off the other three might scare Ed straight.

Its worth a try.

[SammySucks1984]

I'd take option e. go to wal mart... buy more bullets and kill all of them...
along with david burnett