JOE SATRIANI Says He 'Came Close' To Playing New York's 'Homecoming Concert' With ALE

[Nitro Express]

I’m a big believer in exploiting everything that is available to you. It never ceases to amaze me you have people who live on the most productive land and they live in poverty and don’t do shit with it. Then you have people who live on land that’s very short on resources but they thrive. It’s all about making the most out of what you got.

[Nitro Express]

Ha! My first real gig was a high school assembly. I had just gotten a 50 watt Marshall master volume head and a 4x12. We had moved everything into the auditorium and I cranked my amp as loud as it would go. I’m just blasting the hell out of the place and the choir director comes running in really pissed that he can hear me in his classroom. He was a stringy looking dude with the worst comb over you had ever seen. I really triggered him.

[Terry]

For as close as Ed and Al were, it doesn't seem the cousins are close at all. I'd be curious to know if they have any kind of relationship. Al's kids are probably wishing they'd have slapped together a shitty album and used their last name to get on big tours.

Wolfgang will NEVER headline an arena. His Dad was blowing away the headliner on his first tour and headlining arena's by his second tour. This guy is a charity case.

Wolfgang really never had to work for anything. His first professional gig was the 2007 tour, and that was hardly a case of roughing it on the road paying dues. Doubtless the accommodations were first class all the way. It wasn't even like he had to go on tour and play Eddie's guitar parts, which actually would be an effort. I mean, I like what Mike Anthony brought to the band, but covering Van Halen's bass parts wasn't the most challenging thing in the world. And the background vocals were augmented by pre-recorded tracks, so even there Ed's kid didn't have to pull the full freight.

That lack of effort he has had to expend shows in the music he has made, which is lazy and frictionless.

The only effort he has had to expend concerns his social media comments. Even there, would anyone care about what he has to say online if he wasn't Eddie Van Halen's kid?

[FORD]

I think its Aric VH you're referring to. I recall his social media profile said "Exercising with the Devil" which was funny.

I doubt he has anything in common with his fat cousin. Perhaps he can offer up some advice to Fatty.

Aric was in training for the Tokyo Olympics. I don't think he actually competed in the games, so maybe he didn't make it through the qualifications or whatever complications came from the games being delayed a year due to Covid. But it's probably safe to say his lifestyle is considerably different from what his dad & uncle were doing at that age, as well as cousin Wolfie.

[Nitro Express]

I think its Aric VH you're referring to. I recall his social media profile said "Exercising with the Devil" which was funny.

I doubt he has anything in common with his fat cousin. Perhaps he can offer up some advice to Fatty.

Wolfgang cried online and said he had family members stealing from him. Well don't know what that is all about but the dude spills his fat guts all over Twitter. He really blasted his bowels in that shit hole.

[Nitro Express]

Sam and Wolf should get together and write a song and call it Extra Cheese. Maybe start a band full of fat fucks and call it Super Size.

[Nitro Express]

Wolf is a fat immature brat whose band has a lame logo. mmm. Yeah like I'mmmmmm loving it! Or mmm I'm going to eat something. Pure cheese chowder in a big fat bread bowl. Give me a break! The only person more lame than Wolfgang is Sammy Hagar.

[Von Halen]

For as close as Ed and Al were, it doesn't seem the cousins are close at all. I'd be curious to know if they have any kind of relationship. Al's kids are probably wishing they'd have slapped together a shitty album and used their last name to get on big tours.

Wolfgang will NEVER headline an arena. His Dad was blowing away the headliner on his first tour and headlining arena's by his second tour. This guy is a charity case.

[Vinnie Velvet]

You can't enjoy your inheritance when you drop dead from a heart attack. Well doing some drumming gives him some exercise but you can't out drum the pizza and onion rings. Alex's son ran track in college and did pretty damn well at it. Al's kids aren't fat.

I think its Aric VH you're referring to. I recall his social media profile said "Exercising with the Devil" which was funny.

I doubt he has anything in common with his fat cousin. Perhaps he can offer up some advice to Fatty.

[Nitro Express]

You can't enjoy your inheritance when you drop dead from a heart attack. Well doing some drumming gives him some exercise but you can't out drum the pizza and onion rings. Alex's son ran track in college and did pretty damn well at it. Al's kids aren't fat.

[Nitro Express]

Sounds like me. Lol

But yes, Fatty didn't have to do any of that cause he's loaded. Oh and he still eats like a slob and plays video games.

Pretty much. It's one thing to love your children. It's another to enable them. There is no excuse to have overweight children who live under your roof. You are just shortening their lives and setting them up for a bad lifestyle. My parents didn't let me sit around and get fat.

[Vinnie Velvet]

This insufferable bastard keeps getting put on these tours because of his last name. Deep down in his giant gut, he knows this.

Agreed.

I mean he gets to play stadiums with Metallica.

If his name wasn't VH they wouldn't go near him.

[Vinnie Velvet]

Exactly. When I realized he was in his 30’s I was like holy shit. This guy is acting like a spoiled 15 year old kid who plays video games. By the time I was 31 I had gone through college, got married had kids and was a project manager with a lot of responsibility. I was 4% body fat and swam laps for 40 minutes every other day.

Sounds like me. Lol

But yes, Fatty didn't have to do any of that cause he's loaded. Oh and he still eats like a slob and plays video games.

[Terry]

Also the idiot used social media as his psychiatrist. He laid on the couch in front of everyone and let it rip. It was quite embarrassing. His mom looks like she’s losing her marbles. No wonder Eddie got better when he found another woman. Wolfie and Valerie are both lame as fuck.

I was sort of the mindset that living your life on social media was something people born in the early 1990s or later have just grown up doing, although as Sesh said all of his internet bitching would perhaps seem less lame if he were 10 years younger than he is...

But even with that said, it's always easy just to not rise to the bait of whatever negative comments people are making on Twitter or whatever platform, because who really gives a toss about negative things people say online anyway? You know, not letting trolls live rent-free in your head, or whatever.

[Nitro Express]

Exactly. When I realized he was in his 30’s I was like holy shit. This guy is acting like a spoiled 15 year old kid who plays video games. By the time I was 31 I had gone through college, got married had kids and was a project manager with a lot of responsibility. I was 4% body fat and swam laps for 40 minutes every other day.