As God Told Me ...

[FORD]

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/02/19/60minutes/rooney/main601254.shtml

As God Told Me ...

Feb. 22, 2004

It doesn't seem right, but religion has been in the news a lot recently.

Pat Robertson says that God has spoken to him and told him that George W. Bush will be re-elected because he deserves to be.

Here's Pat Robertson's exact quote: "I think George Bush is going to win in a walk. I'm hearing from the Lord that it's going to be a blowout."

The movie by Mel Gibson called “The Passion of the Christ” is the other religious issue in the news. Everyone's talking about that. The question is whether the Jews killed Jesus Christ - who was Jewish, of course.

I hadn't wanted to say anything about this, because it seemed like a personal matter, but Pat Robertson isn't the only one who has heard from God.

I heard from God just the other night. God always seems to call at night.

"Andrew," God said to me. He always calls me "Andrew." I like that.

"Andrew, you have the eyes and ears of a lot of people. I wish you'd tell your viewers that both Pat Robertson and Mel Gibson strike Me as wackos. I believe that's one of your current words. They're crazy as bedbugs, another earthly expression. I created bedbugs. I'll tell you, they're no crazier than people,” said God.

"Let me just say that I think I'd remember if I'd ever talked to Pat Robertson, and I'd remember if I said Bush would get re-elected in a blowout."

“As far as Mel Gibson goes, I haven't seen his movie, 'The Passion of the Christ,' because it hasn't opened up here yet. But I did catch Gibson being interviewed by Diane Sawyer. I did something right when I came up with her, didn't I,” added God. “Anyway, as I was saying, Mel is a real nut case. What in the world was I thinking when I created him? Listen, we all make mistakes."

That is what God said to me. That's about all He did say to me because I'm sure God has a lot more important things to do than talk to someone on television.

My own question to Pat Robertson is this: The election looks as though it could be close, certainly not a blowout. If George W. Bush loses the election to a Democrat, will you become an atheist?

My question to Mel Gibson is: "How many million dollars does it look as if you're going to make off the crucifixion of Christ?"

[Seshmeister]

Originally posted by FORD

My question to Mel Gibson is: "How many million dollars does it look as if you're going to make off the crucifixion of Christ?"

A FUCK of a lot less than the Catholic church.

Cheers!

[BigBadBrian]

His venomous attacks means Andy is running scared from this movie. As he should......he's almost in the grave.

[KANE]

Re: As God Told Me ...

Originally posted by FORD
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/...in601254.shtml

As God Told Me ...

Feb. 22, 2004

It doesn't seem right, but religion has been in the news a lot recently.

Pat Robertson says that God has spoken to him and told him that George W. Bush will be re-elected because he deserves to be.

Here's Pat Robertson's exact quote: "I think George Bush is going to win in a walk. I'm hearing from the Lord that it's going to be a blowout."

The movie by Mel Gibson called “The Passion of the Christ” is the other religious issue in the news. Everyone's talking about that. The question is whether the Jews killed Jesus Christ - who was Jewish, of course.

I hadn't wanted to say anything about this, because it seemed like a personal matter, but Pat Robertson isn't the only one who has heard from God.

I heard from God just the other night. God always seems to call at night.

"Andrew," God said to me. He always calls me "Andrew." I like that.

"Andrew, you have the eyes and ears of a lot of people. I wish you'd tell your viewers that both Pat Robertson and Mel Gibson strike Me as wackos. I believe that's one of your current words. They're crazy as bedbugs, another earthly expression. I created bedbugs. I'll tell you, they're no crazier than people,” said God.

"Let me just say that I think I'd remember if I'd ever talked to Pat Robertson, and I'd remember if I said Bush would get re-elected in a blowout."

“As far as Mel Gibson goes, I haven't seen his movie, 'The Passion of the Christ,' because it hasn't opened up here yet. But I did catch Gibson being interviewed by Diane Sawyer. I did something right when I came up with her, didn't I,” added God. “Anyway, as I was saying, Mel is a real nut case. What in the world was I thinking when I created him? Listen, we all make mistakes."

That is what God said to me. That's about all He did say to me because I'm sure God has a lot more important things to do than talk to someone on television.

My own question to Pat Robertson is this: The election looks as though it could be close, certainly not a blowout. If George W. Bush loses the election to a Democrat, will you become an atheist?

My question to Mel Gibson is: "How many million dollars does it look as if you're going to make off the crucifixion of Christ?"

50,000,000
25,000.000 He's got invested outta his pocket, another 25 in advertising, he said he would not break even, from the heart my man, something you probably cant understand....

[rustoffa]

Geeezus....Andy Rooney's so synical he wont even take a hedgeclipper to his eyebrows.If you think for one olympic fraction of a second that Gibson's "vision" wasn't planned to rake HUGE box office from the get-go you're a fucking moron.I wanna see "The last persecution of Gibson".After all,that's the horseshit he's plagiarizing in the guise of "the real story".He should stick to mullets and Danny Glover.

[John Ashcroft]

Originally posted by Seshmeister
A FUCK of a lot less than the Catholic church.

Cheers!

Ha! You and I aren't nearly as dissimilar as previously thought! Exactly my thoughts when I first saw that particular line...

But at least the Vatican is putting all of that money to good use.

[ELVIS]

FORD..

Your thoughts ??

[alexpgrimes]

Didn't Pat Robertson say that god told him that if he didn't raise 10 million dollars that he was gonna be called home? Where's Jimmy Swaggart with his hookers when you ned him???

[FORD]

Originally posted by alexpgrimes
Didn't Pat Robertson say that god told him that if he didn't raise 10 million dollars that he was gonna be called home? Where's Jimmy Swaggart with his hookers when you ned him???

No, that was Oral Roberts. He's from Asscrotch's (red)neck of the woods

And Jimmy Swaggart was busy with the hookers and had no comment.

[FORD]

Originally posted by ELVIS
FORD..

Your thoughts ??

About the movie? Haven't seen it yet. I might wait for the DVD. Seeing JC beaten and crucified on the big screen really doesn't appeal that much to me.

[David Lee Rocks]

Ive read the book, I have no desire either to see Jesus crucified on a big screen,

[Satan]

I was there for the real thing, and then JC came down to my place for the weekend. I don't need to see the movie

[ELVIS]

I meant your thoughts on Andy Rooney's rediculous attitude...

I was gonna see the movie this afternoon but it's sold out everywhere around here...

[FORD]

Conversations With God

February 23, 2004

By Ken Schram

SEATTLE - Pat Robertson says God told him that George Dubya was gonna be re-elected.

And that was BEFORE Ralph Nader pushed into the picture.

I don't know why God talks to Pat Robertson so much.

Maybe because Jimmy Swaggert's been out of the loop for so long.

Anyway, I was wondering if God ever talks to Democrats, or Libertarians and Independents.

I think they deserve divine guidance as much as Republicans do.

I believe Howard Dean talks to God.

Somebody overheard one of those conversations: "Oh God, PLEASE let me win one!"

I think Democrats are gonna be ticked off if God told Ralph Nader to run.

They're all worried that he'll just end up taking votes away from their guy, making it easier for Dubya to win.

They insist that's what happened last time around.

All I know is that God told me: "Ken, people should vote for who they think will be the best president."

God said the Devil's played around with American politics so much that there's hardly any difference between Democrats and Republicans any more, and that sometimes an independent voice can bring substance to the political debate.

I don't think God said that to Pat Robertson though.

Even when it's God, Robertson only hears what he wants to hear.

[ELVIS]

Hehehehehe...