Tweet
The Dukes Of Hazard: I saw it for free
Where to start?
Welp, I had free passes to see this soul-sucking piece of cinematography @ the local drive-in earlier tonight.
Two fucking hours of my life are gone forever....I'm not ready to pay the boatman just yet, but it was similair to a near-death experience. Just fucking horrible.
Word to the Steins: Willie Nelson can't act....he can't even fucking breathe. If you ever cast that pigtailed, pot-smoking, tax-evading music legend in a movie again, I'll personally renovate awshwitz.
I have no fucking idea why that american pie dipshit was driving the general lee...fuck, I have no idea how I lived through this movie. That dipshit is the onscreen version of bloated roadkill with hands for eyes. How do these mouthbreathing flistafucks get major gigs? Oh yeah, they get fucked up the ass by Mickey Rourke's poodle while it's wearing a yamika. Pathetic.
Johnny Konucksville? Stick to the plan dude....you're a Jackass. It's really too bad that proper script delivery isn't like falling out of a motor home full of donkey shit.
Jessica Simpson? Baby, you're possibly the most talented actress I've ever scene. You literally DEMANDED that the viewing audience get past your vanilla pudding ass....you INSISTED there's more than dripping-wet sexuality on display. I applaud your dedication to film-oriented credibility.
Linda Carter looked grate...looks can't change the fact that she has the acting ability of a pie plate.
I ain't gonna lambast Burt Reynolds....he's a legend.
Fuck it, Burt.....get a new fucking agent and hairpiece. You tried dude....that shit was gold....fire your fucking agent. Pour some allum on Dom Delouise.....whatever you have to do to save yourself from further career suicide.
This movie gets two middle fingers up. Number fucking eleven.
Welp, I had free passes to see this soul-sucking piece of cinematography @ the local drive-in earlier tonight.
Two fucking hours of my life are gone forever....I'm not ready to pay the boatman just yet, but it was similair to a near-death experience. Just fucking horrible.
Word to the Steins: Willie Nelson can't act....he can't even fucking breathe. If you ever cast that pigtailed, pot-smoking, tax-evading music legend in a movie again, I'll personally renovate awshwitz.
I have no fucking idea why that american pie dipshit was driving the general lee...fuck, I have no idea how I lived through this movie. That dipshit is the onscreen version of bloated roadkill with hands for eyes. How do these mouthbreathing flistafucks get major gigs? Oh yeah, they get fucked up the ass by Mickey Rourke's poodle while it's wearing a yamika. Pathetic.
Johnny Konucksville? Stick to the plan dude....you're a Jackass. It's really too bad that proper script delivery isn't like falling out of a motor home full of donkey shit.
Jessica Simpson? Baby, you're possibly the most talented actress I've ever scene. You literally DEMANDED that the viewing audience get past your vanilla pudding ass....you INSISTED there's more than dripping-wet sexuality on display. I applaud your dedication to film-oriented credibility.
Linda Carter looked grate...looks can't change the fact that she has the acting ability of a pie plate.
I ain't gonna lambast Burt Reynolds....he's a legend.
Fuck it, Burt.....get a new fucking agent and hairpiece. You tried dude....that shit was gold....fire your fucking agent. Pour some allum on Dom Delouise.....whatever you have to do to save yourself from further career suicide.
This movie gets two middle fingers up. Number fucking eleven.
Comment