Tweet
Dear RothArmy™ Team,
Long butt not forgotten, the VH internet community's h69 here. I've missed you as much as you've generally badmouthed me for not being here. Lettuce get down to the specifics of why I hath returned:
1. The RothArmy Torch - YES, Roth back in VH means light that fucker up. It wasnt a Sauce Sobeleski torch. It was a DLR returning to VH torch. WHICH HE HAS.
2. Wolfie. First of all let me say that I was the first motherfucking negro to POO POO this. Half of me advocating that Valerie's parental rights should be terminated for allowing this 15 year old around not only porno parties but also the world tour. Ed and Al, by their own admission say that they began drinking at ages even earlier, inasmuch as the recent RS audio posted today they say that if Wolfie can "hold his own" musically, then age is not an issue. Well, ME wish the doorman at Washington's in Fort Collins was as forward thinking back in 1985 and 86. I digress because I am very two faced cake and eat it too in terms of the Wolfie thing. Because, as a 15 year old... no fucking way that it gets any better than touring AS Van Halen. The booze the drugs the poontang EVERYTHING at your whim. SO go, go go go Wolfie VH, you former little fattie in puberty hell.. eat that shit up and get the self confidence that much of us never had. What the fuck. It's not like this kid is Anna Nicole's son and is gonna DIE SOON on the methadone. Hell... he's got Valerie Bertinelli as his mom and from what I can tell, she ain't Anna Nicole and she is doing everything to keep the kid OUT of the rock n roll. There's a balance there that we need to respect and also be jealous of. The bottom line, to me about WGVH, is what DLR said to Rolling stone:
I am interested to see what Wolfie brings to the team with DLR
of course, like you all.. I am MORE interested in some NEW material than the rehashing of the old songs, but either way, I'm cool wit dat.
3. Janie Liszewski. Worst defecation upon the Van Halen legacy outside of Ray Danniels. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. Public Relations???? IF she is a true PR expert, then EVH should sue the fuck out of her. Anyone that knows anything about PR realizes that this self-opportunistic sperm receptacle (on film anyway) is nothing more than a horse-faced Sandra Bullock wanna-be Valerie Bertinelli who will say YES to anything that mister meth wants to lie or not say shit about. WHEN THE FUCK did evh decide it was OK to bottom out with this cunt? Dude... you had Valerie Bertinelli. For FUCK sake. Fucking up Van Halen??? You should be ex-communicated for fucking up the Valerie Van Halen thing alone. What the FUCK are you thinking? You've got the CURE FOR CANCER????
4. EVH cures "cancer". This dude's a litany of lies. I can't recall how many times my sister or my mom or SOMEONE who knows me, asks me if either EVH is in "remission" or has "died". Well, I tell them - Eddie Van Halen NEVER had cancer. HE had a non-cancerous BENIGN growth on his tongue. He uses that as an excuse to explain his continued slurring in the few interviews that he ever does, saying that he has had 1/3 of his tongue cut out. Still while that explains the slurring, it doesn't explain the talking in circles and not making sense. Such as the "tree not falling from the nut" or what he said at NAAM 2007 about the iceberg? Wait maybe the chemo explains that. MY BAD. No... fuck this clown. WHAT a douchebag with his lies. Then again... who cares? KNOW, and just be wise to it.
5. "Sauce Sobeleski, Samuel Roy Hagar, "the other half"; "A Note To Everyone Now That Dave is In, Mike is Out..." I agree with Brett in THEORY. But lettuce talk JesterStar REAL WORLD politico here. It's NOt that he's in a second band, and you can't be in 2 bands. That is more "cancer cure, if gary is in he's in for life my musical soulmate elephant balls from heaven" kind of bullshit. SO Mike is in 2 bands. WHo fucking cares. TOmmy Lee is in about as many bands as he is whores pussies. The crue, supernova, etc etc. SO we all know that the cant be in 2 bands thing is bullshit.
THIS came down to Mike speaking in the press to say how fucked up eddie was on booze and meth and how he wouldnt work with him again. Of course Sammy gave him the confidence to say this shit. OF course, this shit was in the making for awhile, THIS was the final blowjob outside of EVH taking Mike's rights to VH.
Don't get me wrong. In this argument, I am on Mike's side. Make no mistake. EVH fucked this guy. BUTT..
In the real world, when you badmouth your boss publically and not to your wife... what else can be EGGspected? Lets face it for years for ALL the years, Mike has "worked" for Van Halen. True... he's a NICE GUY. True.. he told the truth. TRUTH.. he should have kept his mouth shut, and that he didn't... I dont feel sorry for him.
6. FORD - dude. I read your shit here. I read your shit at Links.
You need to know - when you say shit like "bush criminal empire" or "Clear Channel Conspiracy", you suddenly and totally lose any fucking credibility with ANYONE you might best in VH subject matter expertise. Lose that shit, dude, el pronto. You're a smart fat motherfucker so get back to being smart, fat and humping the MILFs that I know your Democratic Liberal cock to fuck. Please dude.
Will VH tour with Roth?
The BREAST part of me says KEWL that they are denied another cash n grab. Get back to basics and RECORD AN ALBUM with DLR AND WOLFIE.
butt....
they WILL find a way to get this tour 2007 summer to happen.
with DLR and WGVH
Like the 2004 Van Hagar "cash n grab"... you all KNOW that I will "discover the possibiltahs" of $200 seats in the nosebleeds just to take my 11 year old and SPOOKS the 2 year old kid that pending a DNA test, could be mine or the negro that sells THA DOPE on the corner.
ANYONE that contests ANYTHING here that I say... can join ME and Jester LIVE on hitchWORLD Radio, on March 16:
BREASTS N TUNAMELTS!!
=h=
Long butt not forgotten, the VH internet community's h69 here. I've missed you as much as you've generally badmouthed me for not being here. Lettuce get down to the specifics of why I hath returned:
1. The RothArmy Torch - YES, Roth back in VH means light that fucker up. It wasnt a Sauce Sobeleski torch. It was a DLR returning to VH torch. WHICH HE HAS.
2. Wolfie. First of all let me say that I was the first motherfucking negro to POO POO this. Half of me advocating that Valerie's parental rights should be terminated for allowing this 15 year old around not only porno parties but also the world tour. Ed and Al, by their own admission say that they began drinking at ages even earlier, inasmuch as the recent RS audio posted today they say that if Wolfie can "hold his own" musically, then age is not an issue. Well, ME wish the doorman at Washington's in Fort Collins was as forward thinking back in 1985 and 86. I digress because I am very two faced cake and eat it too in terms of the Wolfie thing. Because, as a 15 year old... no fucking way that it gets any better than touring AS Van Halen. The booze the drugs the poontang EVERYTHING at your whim. SO go, go go go Wolfie VH, you former little fattie in puberty hell.. eat that shit up and get the self confidence that much of us never had. What the fuck. It's not like this kid is Anna Nicole's son and is gonna DIE SOON on the methadone. Hell... he's got Valerie Bertinelli as his mom and from what I can tell, she ain't Anna Nicole and she is doing everything to keep the kid OUT of the rock n roll. There's a balance there that we need to respect and also be jealous of. The bottom line, to me about WGVH, is what DLR said to Rolling stone:
This is something that was said and done long before I got into the studio. Thank God, the kid is great, huh? I guess it's either in the blood or it's not. The band sounds incandescent, and with THE KID in there, you have an interesting mix of old school and new school. It's kind of like watching DRAGNET on your ipod.
"I'm going to put some words in Ed's mouth. Whatever explanation he may give about having his son in the band, I'm going to superimpose: He wants to play with his kid while he's still at the top of his game and able to ... and that's also the same reason I'm in the band in its current configuration. No questions asked. He said, 'Hey, c'mon up the hill and make some music.' I said, 'Great. I'd love to play with you while you're still on the top of your game.' "
"I'm going to put some words in Ed's mouth. Whatever explanation he may give about having his son in the band, I'm going to superimpose: He wants to play with his kid while he's still at the top of his game and able to ... and that's also the same reason I'm in the band in its current configuration. No questions asked. He said, 'Hey, c'mon up the hill and make some music.' I said, 'Great. I'd love to play with you while you're still on the top of your game.' "
of course, like you all.. I am MORE interested in some NEW material than the rehashing of the old songs, but either way, I'm cool wit dat.
3. Janie Liszewski. Worst defecation upon the Van Halen legacy outside of Ray Danniels. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. Public Relations???? IF she is a true PR expert, then EVH should sue the fuck out of her. Anyone that knows anything about PR realizes that this self-opportunistic sperm receptacle (on film anyway) is nothing more than a horse-faced Sandra Bullock wanna-be Valerie Bertinelli who will say YES to anything that mister meth wants to lie or not say shit about. WHEN THE FUCK did evh decide it was OK to bottom out with this cunt? Dude... you had Valerie Bertinelli. For FUCK sake. Fucking up Van Halen??? You should be ex-communicated for fucking up the Valerie Van Halen thing alone. What the FUCK are you thinking? You've got the CURE FOR CANCER????
4. EVH cures "cancer". This dude's a litany of lies. I can't recall how many times my sister or my mom or SOMEONE who knows me, asks me if either EVH is in "remission" or has "died". Well, I tell them - Eddie Van Halen NEVER had cancer. HE had a non-cancerous BENIGN growth on his tongue. He uses that as an excuse to explain his continued slurring in the few interviews that he ever does, saying that he has had 1/3 of his tongue cut out. Still while that explains the slurring, it doesn't explain the talking in circles and not making sense. Such as the "tree not falling from the nut" or what he said at NAAM 2007 about the iceberg? Wait maybe the chemo explains that. MY BAD. No... fuck this clown. WHAT a douchebag with his lies. Then again... who cares? KNOW, and just be wise to it.
5. "Sauce Sobeleski, Samuel Roy Hagar, "the other half"; "A Note To Everyone Now That Dave is In, Mike is Out..." I agree with Brett in THEORY. But lettuce talk JesterStar REAL WORLD politico here. It's NOt that he's in a second band, and you can't be in 2 bands. That is more "cancer cure, if gary is in he's in for life my musical soulmate elephant balls from heaven" kind of bullshit. SO Mike is in 2 bands. WHo fucking cares. TOmmy Lee is in about as many bands as he is whores pussies. The crue, supernova, etc etc. SO we all know that the cant be in 2 bands thing is bullshit.
THIS came down to Mike speaking in the press to say how fucked up eddie was on booze and meth and how he wouldnt work with him again. Of course Sammy gave him the confidence to say this shit. OF course, this shit was in the making for awhile, THIS was the final blowjob outside of EVH taking Mike's rights to VH.
Don't get me wrong. In this argument, I am on Mike's side. Make no mistake. EVH fucked this guy. BUTT..
In the real world, when you badmouth your boss publically and not to your wife... what else can be EGGspected? Lets face it for years for ALL the years, Mike has "worked" for Van Halen. True... he's a NICE GUY. True.. he told the truth. TRUTH.. he should have kept his mouth shut, and that he didn't... I dont feel sorry for him.
6. FORD - dude. I read your shit here. I read your shit at Links.
You need to know - when you say shit like "bush criminal empire" or "Clear Channel Conspiracy", you suddenly and totally lose any fucking credibility with ANYONE you might best in VH subject matter expertise. Lose that shit, dude, el pronto. You're a smart fat motherfucker so get back to being smart, fat and humping the MILFs that I know your Democratic Liberal cock to fuck. Please dude.
Will VH tour with Roth?
The BREAST part of me says KEWL that they are denied another cash n grab. Get back to basics and RECORD AN ALBUM with DLR AND WOLFIE.
butt....
they WILL find a way to get this tour 2007 summer to happen.
with DLR and WGVH
Like the 2004 Van Hagar "cash n grab"... you all KNOW that I will "discover the possibiltahs" of $200 seats in the nosebleeds just to take my 11 year old and SPOOKS the 2 year old kid that pending a DNA test, could be mine or the negro that sells THA DOPE on the corner.
ANYONE that contests ANYTHING here that I say... can join ME and Jester LIVE on hitchWORLD Radio, on March 16:
BREASTS N TUNAMELTS!!
=h=
Comment