A Question for the guys

[Northern Girl]

Tell me what is on a guy's mind when he sends a lady a drink at the bar without any contact whatsoever. What is he expecting? Especially not knowing if you are available or not. Would he be more offended if I said "No take it back" or if I accept it but don't go over and talk to him. It's an ackward position to be in, and I feel bad accepting if I'm really not interested. But it seems rude not to accept either, and it would be embarrasing to the guy for the bartender to go back and say "she didn't want it."

If a bartender comes over, and says "Hey, that guy wants to buy you a drink" and I accept; then that's a different story. Then I'm saying it's okay and I will go over and talk to him.

Can I get a male perspective on this?

[Fairwrning]

Accept the drink...go talk to the guy..and if he is an ass...give him back his 3 bucks:D

[Northern Girl]

What if you're not available, and the guy honestly doesn't have a chance?

[Fairwrning]

well..you basically tell him that..carry the drink over..tell him he has no chance..and offer to give him the drink back..chances are you will keep the drink and no feelings are hurt...

[Northern Girl]

Originally posted by fairwrning
well..you basically tell him that..carry the drink over..tell him he has no chance..and offer to give him the drink back..chances are you will keep the drink and no feelings are hurt...

Well, that's a good answer. It's still ackward to have to reject someone to their face for whatever reason. But not available is definitely the easiest reason.

[Fairwrning]

Originally posted by Northern Girl
Well, that's a good answer. It's still ackward to have to reject someone to their face for whatever reason. But not available is definitely the easiest reason.

I have heard it many times:D

[POJO_Risin]

Well...wrning's advice is solid...but...

if a guy doesn't have the balls to walk up to you and offer you a drink...you shouldn't be expected to walk up to him to say no...

give the bartender a note on a napkin that says...thanks...but I'm taken...leave the drink next to you...and order another one...

if he doesn't look offended...take both...

[Northern Girl]

Originally posted by POJO_Risin
Well...wrning's advice is solid...but...

if a guy doesn't have the balls to walk up to you and offer you a drink...you shouldn't be expected to walk up to him to say no...

give the bartender a note on a napkin that says...thanks...but I'm taken...leave the drink next to you...and order another one...

if he doesn't look offended...take both...

I like that too. You're a wise one, Pojo.

[David Van Via]

Originally posted by POJO_Risin
Well...wrning's advice is solid...but...

if a guy doesn't have the balls to walk up to you and offer you a drink...you shouldn't be expected to walk up to him to say no...

give the bartender a note on a napkin that says...thanks...but I'm taken...leave the drink next to you...and order another one...

if he doesn't look offended...take both...

This sounds like the voice of experience! :D

[chunkashin!!]

Originally posted by Northern Girl
Tell me what is on a guy's mind when he sends a lady a drink at the bar without any contact whatsoever. What is he expecting? Especially not knowing if you are available or not. Would he be more offended if I said "No take it back" or if I accept it but don't go over and talk to him. It's an ackward position to be in, and I feel bad accepting if I'm really not interested. But it seems rude not to accept either, and it would be embarrasing to the guy for the bartender to go back and say "she didn't want it."

If a bartender comes over, and says "Hey, that guy wants to buy you a drink" and I accept; then that's a different story. Then I'm saying it's okay and I will go over and talk to him.

Can I get a male perspective on this?

DONT TAKE IT!!!, suppose its spiked, the guy gould be a rapist!!, Well in that situation the guy is just looking for a one night stand. Its clearly obvious. depends if you want a shag or not.

[lms2]

How about a female perspective?

Do you want the drink or not? Thats the real question! If a guy smiles and says hi, do you feel the need to smile and say I am taken? Or do you wait for an advance?

The guy is not offering anything but a drink at this point. :D

[Northern Girl]

Originally posted by chunkashin!!
Well in that situation the guy is just looking for a one night stand. Its clearly obvious.

Out of the mouths of babes! See you are all bringing up good points, and that's why I don't know what to think. I suppose it is an individual thing what he is expecting.

[POJO_Risin]

Hell no...if I'm buying anyone a drink...it's for a sure thing...lmfao...or myself...

hell if I'm wasting $3 on someone who may have a drunken 300 .lber in the bathroom waiting to kick my ass...or worse yet...

drink a drink I bought for her...

If I wasn't set to walk up to the lady myself...and trust me...after the 6th or 7th beer...that wasn't an issue...I sure as fuck wasn't going to take a drink out of my own pocket...lmfao...

[Full Bug]

Be glad that you are attractive enough to get a guys interest, could be worse.....
You are likely hot, deal with it, lol.....

[Fairwrning]

ya know..after thinking...if i were female and a guy bought me a drink..i would drink it and not say shit..i would not approach his ass if he didnt approach me first..and then i would say i was taken and laugh