"the Emperor:

[bueno bob]

14.


After a few days of riding, King Ron sat alone in his Kingly Tent (or so he called it, and it was rather stately), reading nudie scrolls. They weren't making any better progress towards Newbergia...a month...unbelievable. Surely his daughter would be dead by the time they got there.
He would see that Gods blasted Emperor's head on top of the tallest spike he could find, hanging from the southern gate of Oregonia.
Or...perhaps he would keep him alive a while...let him enjoy all the fun to be had in the dungeons.
It was something to ponder, King Ron thought as he reached for another nudie scroll.

[bueno bob]

15.


As the days turned into weeks, Princess Arletta found herself spending more and more time with the Emperor. And the changes in the kingdom of Newbergia were nothing short of miraculous and remarkable. In three weeks, practically the entire countryside had turned into golden fields, clear streams, tall green grass, flowers and healthy trees. The sun shone brightly, and while there was occasional rain, it was a healthy rain. The beasts that used to lurk the countryside no longer were found, having had retreated to better climates for them.
And he was right - the beauty of Newbergia was a challenge to the beauty of her fathers realm.
But the time was running out. There were, at best, perhaps two days before the legions of King Ron entered Newbergia's borders.
She was in her room, now. Brushing her hair and trying on different outfits for the dinner the Emperor had planned for her tonight (no Mongolian Barbeque this time - tonight was fresh seafood brought in from the far-off barony of Newport Village).
Bob and Ian, meanwhile, were walking down the halls of the citadel, heading towards the throne room to see what business they had before them.
"Two days, man," Ian reminded him.
"Yup," Bob said, noncomittal.
"And?" Ian prodded.
"We'll see what we see when the time's right," Bob said.
"She came to me, you know," Ian told him.
"Figured she would, sooner or later - what did she ask you?" Bob querried.
"If you were honest, what my story was, the same things you figured she'd ask," Ian replied. "I was honest with her, told her everything she asked - except for how we got to be here in the first place."
"Good. Best she not know that - not yet, anyway," Bob said. "Two days."

[bueno bob]

16.


The two days remaining went quickly for King Ron and his knights. They arrived at the borders of Newbergia right as expected - in fact, an hour early. They were all surprised by what they saw. This was supposed to be Newbergia, but...the land was beautiful beyond words. There were full trees, lush grasses, fresh fruit, plants, flowers...running streams...grazing animals...not at all what they had been expecting.
"Sire - the land is...not like I expected," his lead knight said to him.
"Me neither," the King replied. "Yet this is it," he finished. "We march in anyway!"

[bueno bob]

17.


Bob and Ian, sitting in the throne room with Princess Arletta in attendance, knew it was time. Ian excused himself. The Princess had tried to see Bob earlier in the day, but Ian had informed her that Bob had left on a very early morning chore, something that he had to do. He had not even told Ian what the chore was, apparently, only that he had said it was "Very important". He had not told her, either.
The Emperor looked at the Princess. "Your father is here with his men - it's time to go greet them, and time that I ask you a question," he said.
Arletta knew what this was. What was going to happen here was going to change everything, forever.
Bob came down from his throne and took her hand. She gave it willingly. He had proven himself to be a person of the highest standing, and a wonderful human being. When she first arrived, she hadn't even wanted to be in the same room with him; now, his presence was reassuring.
"The bard Paul Stanley once asked a question of grate import, a question I would now ask you. That question is - do you love me? Do you love me? Do you love me? I mean it, do ya - really love me?" he asked her, asking four times, just like from the old minstrel's song.
She gave her answer, and they both rode out on horses from the livery to meet her father. Ian would be out there too, waiting as well.

[bueno bob]

18.


King Ron and his men went through the kingdom of Newbergia with no resistance offered - in fact, they didn't see anyone out on the streets at all. In hiding, perhaps.
When they arrived at the gates of the citadel, King Ron held up a fist, and the knights in march behind him held their positions. Beyond the gates was the Emperor and his wizard - and his daughter with with them. The knights raised their bows, but King Ron ordered them to hold for fear of a stray arrow hitting his daughter.
"I, King Ron the VIIth, in the name of all that is good and holy in Oregonia, demand that you return my daughter!" he bellowed at the top of his lungs.
"Father, wait!" Princess Arletta cried out. "He is a good man! Look at the land itself! Is this what you expected to see here? I've learned much about him! Much that I would share with you! There can be peace between our kingdoms and we can usher in a new era of prosperity, one that all of Oregonia could experience like none other!" She shouted.
"Bah! Your mind has been deceived with his lies! Return her to me unmarred, Emperor , and I may spare your life!" King Ron threatened.
Bob raised a hand and slapped the ass of the horse that the Princess was atop. The horse galloped off at full trot towards the gate.
"No!" she cried out, trying to jump off of the horse. Bob made a small motion with her hand and her legs and waist seemed to freeze up on her. She couldn't even so much as lean to one side of the horse and slide off, for her saddle straps were laced tightly. He motioned again and the front gates to the citadel opened. The horse rode past the King and was stayed by the knights. Suddenly, the Princess found herself able to move again.
"No! No, this cannot be! Father, you must listen to me! You MUST!" Arletta cried out, trying to get to her father.
"Take that damn fool child away, now! I have business here!" the King ordered his men. The Princess disappeared into a crowd of knights, taking her back away from the citadel. Her cries grew fainter and fainter until they disappeared altogether.
"Emperor! In the name of all that is good with the kingdom of Oregonia, I demand that you surrender yourself to me immediately!" the King shouted.
Ian turned towards Bob. "Well, I guess this is it," he said.
Bob smiled. "We had a damn good run, my friend. I will truly miss you."
Ian looked at Bob slyly. "So what exactly was her answer to you, anyway?" he asked.
Bob smiled and turned to look at his old, old friend. "Does it really matter? You and I both knew this was the only outcome possible," he said.
"If I'd have known that, I'd have stopped you," Ian said.
They both shared a look at each other and burst into laughter. They were relics and they knew it - their time had come and gone, ages ago.
"Well, maybe not," Ian said. "You gonna be OK?" he asked the Emperor.
"You know, I think I will be. For the first time in a long, long time, I think I'm gonna be fine."
Bob pulled forth his sword, it's name Tomorrow's Dream, from his scabbard and held it aloft. Sunlight glittered on the blade, the same one that he had carried for thousands of years. For the first time, he addressed King Ron. "Hear me, King. This sword, 'Tomorrow's Dream', has been my sign of office for longer than you can possibly imagine. And HERE is where I discard it!" Bob shouted. He tossed the sword down, point first, into the ground. The sword stuck and balanced. "I surrender myself to you under one condition - if this condition is not met, I swear that I will slaughter ALL of your men right here and now!" he shouted, and his voice took on a supernatural effect, booming over the countryside. Later on, the knights all swore that he grew at least two feet taller and a hundred pounds heavier in stature, just to prove that doing so would be very little effort to him.
King Ron considered this. He had archers, but...he had a feeling that he was sorely unprepared to do battle here. "What is your request? Ask, and I shall consider it," he said, trying to affect a disinterested tone.
What the Emperor said was

[Sarge's Little Helper]

18.


King Ron and his men went through the kingdom of Newbergia with no resistance offered - in fact, they didn't see anyone out on the streets at all. In hiding, perhaps.
When they arrived at the gates of the citadel, King Ron held up a fist, and the knights in march behind him held their positions. Beyond the gates was the Emperor and his wizard - and his daughter with with them. The knights raised their bows, but King Ron ordered them to hold for fear of a stray arrow hitting his daughter.
"I, King Ron the VIIth, in the name of all that is good and holy in Oregonia, demand that you return my daughter!" he bellowed at the top of his lungs.
"Father, wait!" Princess Arletta cried out. "He is a good man! Look at the land itself! Is this what you expected to see here? I've learned much about him! Much that I would share with you! There can be peace between our kingdoms and we can usher in a new era of prosperity, one that all of Oregonia could experience like none other!" She shouted.
"Bah! Your mind has been deceived with his lies! Return her to me unmarred, Emperor , and I may spare your life!" King Ron threatened.
Bob raised a hand and slapped the ass of the horse that the Princess was atop. The horse galloped off at full trot towards the gate.
"No!" she cried out, trying to jump off of the horse. Bob made a small motion with her hand and her legs and waist seemed to freeze up on her. She couldn't even so much as lean to one side of the horse and slide off, for her saddle straps were laced tightly. He motioned again and the front gates to the citadel opened. The horse rode past the King and was stayed by the knights. Suddenly, the Princess found herself able to move again.
"No! No, this cannot be! Father, you must listen to me! You MUST!" Arletta cried out, trying to get to her father.
"Take that damn fool child away, now! I have business here!" the King ordered his men. The Princess disappeared into a crowd of knights, taking her back away from the citadel. Her cries grew fainter and fainter until they disappeared altogether.
"Emperor! In the name of all that is good with the kingdom of Oregonia, I demand that you surrender yourself to me immediately!" the King shouted.
Ian turned towards Bob. "Well, I guess this is it," he said.
Bob smiled. "We had a damn good run, my friend. I will truly miss you."
Ian looked at Bob slyly. "So what exactly was her answer to you, anyway?" he asked.
Bob smiled and turned to look at his old, old friend. "Does it really matter? You and I both knew this was the only outcome possible," he said.
"If I'd have known that, I'd have stopped you," Ian said.
They both shared a look at each other and burst into laughter. They were relics and they knew it - their time had come and gone, ages ago.
"Well, maybe not," Ian said. "You gonna be OK?" he asked the Emperor.
"You know, I think I will be. For the first time in a long, long time, I think I'm gonna be fine."
Bob pulled forth his sword, it's name Tomorrow's Dream, from his scabbard and held it aloft. Sunlight glittered on the blade, the same one that he had carried for thousands of years. For the first time, he addressed King Ron. "Hear me, King. This sword, 'Tomorrow's Dream', has been my sign of office for longer than you can possibly imagine. And HERE is where I discard it!" Bob shouted. He tossed the sword down, point first, into the ground. The sword stuck and balanced. "I surrender myself to you under one condition - if this condition is not met, I swear that I will slaughter ALL of your men right here and now!" he shouted, and his voice took on a supernatural effect, booming over the countryside. Later on, the knights all swore that he grew at least two feet taller and a hundred pounds heavier in stature, just to prove that doing so would be very little effort to him.
King Ron considered this. He had archers, but...he had a feeling that he was sorely unprepared to do battle here. "What is your request? Ask, and I shall consider it," he said, trying to affect a disinterested tone.
What the Emperor said was

Oops. I wasn't paying attention. Tell me again what is going on.

[bueno bob]

19.


"You will take this wizard, Ian, into your service as your personal court wizard. He has perfected a teleportation spell, and will serve you gladly - and he's much more powerful than anyone you currently have on your staff," Bob said.
Ian shot a look over at him. "What in the fucking hell are you doing?" he asked, bewildered.
"Saving your life. My immortality extends to you while you're here, but nothing else. Sever yourself from the land and you can live a natural life - as natural as a wizard's can be, anyway," Bob said.
"God damn, Bob," Ian said.
Bob smiled. "Go get married, have some kids. You lost that when you followed me here, and I've always owed you that in return. Here's your freedom, my friend - and consider the payment made in full. Go back and re-serve the lands you were born to, you've earned it."
King Ron spoke. "This is acceptable," he said.
With a simple look of understanding passed between them, Ian rode off and joined the King's calvary. Of course, he would be taken into custody and processed to ensure that he didn't make any trouble, but Bob had no doubt that they'd put him to good use soon enough.
Slowly, Bob rode down the hill to meet his fate.

[bueno bob]

20.


Ian used his teleportation spell in order to return them all to Oregonia quickly. At first, King Ron was untrusting (who wants a beard growing out of their ass?), but after Ian safely demonstrated the spell on a raccoon, everyone seemed willing enough.
Bob and Arletta did not see each other.

At evening of that day, Bob stood alone in the center of King Ron's throne room, bound in chains, his robes removed. Placed on him was a ratty, chewed garment, the no-color of the sky on an average day. Prisoner attire.
He had no doubt that his execution would be soon.
King Ron and his magistrates entered the room. Neither Ian nor Arletta were anywhere to be seen, but that didn't surprise him any. The King took a seat upon his throne and read from a scrolled up parchment, signed it, and returned it to his magistrate who quickly whisked away to file it.
This was it, then.
The King spoke. "We have decided on an accurate punishment for you, one to be carried out immediately."
Bob smiled.
"Your punishment is not what I would have preferred, but as King, I must listen to the voices of the council, and since there has been no open act of war and only the kidnapping charge, I sentence you to spent the rest of your natural life in the deepest part of my dungeons. You will be abandoned there, left with no food, no water, no other interaction - nothing. Survive for as long as you can. Guards." Bob smile faded. Life? Abandoned? No one was going to actually KILL him and take off his head?
Oh shit. The fun was literally just getting started, then.
The guards siezed him and drug him off towards the dungeons, far beneath the castle.

Within the hour, he had an old, abandoned cell as his new home to replace the old citadel. There was nothing else out here. No torture devices, no jailors, no other prisoners. Nothing. Just a few misguided moles and rats that happened to come burrowing through. Food enough, he supposed.
Just how long would he be here?
How long would he live until someone came around to kill him?
He thought of the Princess, of her blue eyes, of her dark hair.
Of how much he missed her already.
And smiled, knowing that no matter how long he had to suffer this endless perdition, the price would be worth every endless second, for just that one month of time with her.
From now until infinity.

[bueno bob]

Epilogue


The wizard Ian did serve in King Ron's court, and actually helped to edge in some new and better policies for the people of Oregonia. He eventually did marry and he did have children. Separated from the Kingdom of Newbergia, he lived his life naturally and passed away when the Gods determined that it was time for him to do so. And his last words were, to seemingly no one in particular, "Thank you."
King Ron himself went on to rule Oregonia much as he had before, although in later years he became very dependent on the advice of his wizard Ian. He was succeeded by his Grandson Austin 20 years after he (as he put it) single-handedly rescued his daughter from the evil clutches of Emperor Bob by defeating him in man to man swordplay, thusly bringing the evil Emperor to justice all by his lonesome. King Ron the VIIth died on the toilet of massive heart failure trying to squeeze out a huge turd created by eating too much fried chicken. His fingers were still greasy.
Princess Arletta was forced to eventually marry, and she chose a respectable enough Prince from Newport Village - ensuring Oregonia plenty of good seafood for the rest of time. She named her first son Austin, and his stories and adventures...well, they're very much a legend of their own, perhaps one that I'll share sometime.
And as for the Emperor?


...his story is far from complete....


fin

[bueno bob]

Well, what do you think? btw, this is available in entirety in my journal, for those who hate the breaks in the story...