Fucking Telemarketers

[fryingdutchman]

Got this in an e-mail from one of my relatives....

In a few weeks, ALL wireless phone numbers are being released to telemarketing companies and you will start to receive sales calls.

YOU WILL BE CHARGED FOR THESE CALLS...

To prevent this, call the following number from your cell phone: (888)382-1222. It is the National DO NOT CALL LIST from the Federal Trade Commission.

It blocks your number for five (5) years.

Can you believe that shit?? Not only do you get hassled by a telemarketer, but you also PAY for it in cell minutes!!

Telemarketers are required to comply with numbers on the list within 30 days of their addition to the list. So if you do it now, you might be able to stop the calls before they even start.

And...if you put your number on the list and you get a call after 30 days, you can pin their worthless, harrassing, telemarketing asses to the wall.

Hope it helps.

[EbDawson]

Dutchman, I believe that's an hoax/vicious rumor. Checkout this site:

http://tinyurl.com/5jkvj

[fryingdutchman]

Originally posted by EbDawson
Dutchman, I believe that's an hoax/vicious rumor. Checkout this site:

http://tinyurl.com/5jkvj

*phew*

That's a relief.

Shoulda known to take it with a grain of salt.

Thanks for the info. Eb!

[ALMOSTsaved]

However, if it proves to be true, follow one of these 20 steps and you should be okay! Well, at least the ones that aren't too time consuming considering it will be YOUR dime for answering the phone!

1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for
bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

2. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so
glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I
have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes
are sore, my dog just died . . . "

3. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to
spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then
ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business,
how many people work there, how they got into this line of work
if they are married, how many kids they have, etc. Continue
asking them personal questions or questions about their company
for as long as necessary.

4. This works great if you are male. Telemarketer: "Hi, my name
is Judy and I'm with XYZ Company. " You: Wait for a second and
with a real husky voice ask, "What are you wearing?"

5. Cry out in surprise, "Judy? Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how
have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief
moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could
know you from.

6. Say "No" over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each
one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to
speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up.

7. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and
Friends Plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can, "I don't
have any friends, would you be my friend?"

8. If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can you get out blood?
Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?"

9. After the Telemarketer gives his or her spiel, ask him or her
to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you
can't just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

10. Tell the Telemarketer that you work for the same company,
and they can't sell to employees.

11. Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a
Telemarketer, set the receiver down, scream, "Oh my God!" and
then hang up.

12. Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask
him/her if he/she will give you his/her home phone number so you
can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that
telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess
you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The
Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" Hang up.

13. Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times.

14. Tell them it is dinner time, but ask if they would please
hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat
at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your
dinner conversation.

15. Tell the Telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and
ask if they could bring you some beer.

16. Ask them to fax the information to you, and make up a number.

17. Tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I'll listen to you. But I
should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any clothes."

18. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a
joke. "Come on, Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your
momma?"

19. Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to
speak up . . . louder . . . louder . . .

20. Tell them to talk very slowly, because you want to write
every word down.

[EbDawson]

Originally posted by ALMOSTsaved

17. Tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I'll listen to you. But I
should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any clothes."

[/B]

[ThrillsNSpills]

Here's a tip for any would be inventors in the house.

The Phone Taser.

Zap those bastards in the middle of a pitch.

Oh Yeah,
you know they'd sell

[franksters]

this list is amazing, thanks for all these great tips, I can't wait to try them!!!

[Nickdfresh]

You can register via web as well:

https://www.donotcall.gov/default.aspx

[Jesus Christ]

Originally posted by ThrillsNSpills
Here's a tip for any would be inventors in the house.

The Phone Taser.

Zap those bastards in the middle of a pitch.

Oh Yeah,
you know they'd sell

Some of Us just use the good old fashioned lightning bolts

Luckily, We don't get many telemarketing calls here in Heaven.

Just the occasional prank call from Satan.

[DlocRoth]

#18...LOL

How's your momma.....priceless.

[Fairwrning]

i like #9 myself..i gotta remember that one....