This Thread Has No Purpose...

[PETE'S BROTHER]

figured this was as good a place as any for this.

i'm up in our bar, talkin' with you guys, usually sports on the tube, after work. every afternoon around 4 one of our "winter roomates" gets home from work. she has two yellow nape amazon parrots, and the female talks quite abit. right now, and most nights, she's downstairs in the kitchen talkin' to the birds and this parrot gets rollin'.

"WAKE UP, WAKE UP, PHOOOONE" "MEEEOOAWH" "WHOOOOOAH BABY" "FEEE-FEWWW" "HELLO" "WHOAHWHOAWWHOAW"

it's really quite amusing, but really hard to put in quotes

and now, back to your regularily scheduled program......:0

[VanHalener]

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[VanHalener]

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[VanHalener]

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[VanHalener]

Pron Kills...

Porn-Watching Trucker Blamed For Fatal Crash - Clumsy Crooks

"So let me get this straight. State Police say the truck driver whose rig hit a disabled car on the Thruway, killing a woman... WAS WATCHING PORN. While driving a huge truck that can't stop or swerve quickly.
Thomas Wallace of Ohio is charged with second-degree manslaughter..."

[kwame k]

Thomas Wallace of Ohio is charged with second-degree manslaughter..."

...and first-degree fucking moron.

It's a new law in Ohio, look it up....it basically allows the family members to bitch slap this idiot to death, if found guilty.

[standin]

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[PETE'S BROTHER]

so i'm outside at work a bit ago, smokin' a cig and lookin' at this old car. one of the guys has a '31 chevy two door with a rumble seat, pretty cool. the guy is restoring it and today was the first time i saw it drivin' around in the parking lot.anyway, it has some old pinstriping from, probably the last paint job it ever had, and it was signed ROTH '83.

Ed Roth - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

just today's two cents

[standin]

Maybe this should be in the recipes section

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[hambon4lif]

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I damn near died one night because of those things!!

....so one night I'm kickin' it with this little Susanna Hoffs-lookin' cutey, and one thing leads to another, and she excuses herself to go to the bathroom. She comes out wearing these Cherry-flavored edible panties and looking smoking hot.
I lifted her up, laid her on the bed, and tore those panties straight off with my teeth. It was then when I discovered that saliva doesn't dissolve them, because I got these things stuck in my throat. It was like a wadded up Fruit Roll-Up caught in there, and I couldn't breathe....I literally thought I was going to die!
Alot of thoughts started racing through my mind. My first thought was that it really wasn't a bad way to go out. Another thought was that I didn't want to go out short of the main course, and I also wanted to live just so I could hear how the hell she was gonna explain this to the paramedics.
Anyway, the will to survive prevailed, and with a bit of self-Heimlich, I was able to reach in there and pull those damn things out.


....this thread may serve no purpose, but there's definitely a lesson to be learned here. If anyone reading this ends up in a situation like that.....remember to chew your food!!

That is all. Thank You, and have a good day!

[VanHalener]

Rip Torn arrested for bank job.

Rip Torn takes a page from 'Jersey Shore' | Staten Island Entertainment - TV & Film - - SILive.com


"...The actor, known for being fairly volatile on and off the movie set, has been arrested for allegedly getting drunk and breaking into a bank with a revolver in Connecticut Friday night..."

[standin]

I damn near died one night because of those things!!

....so one night I'm kickin' it with this little Susanna Hoffs-lookin' cutey, and one thing leads to another, and she excuses herself to go to the bathroom. She comes out wearing these Cherry-flavored edible panties and looking smoking hot.
I lifted her up, laid her on the bed, and tore those panties straight off with my teeth. It was then when I discovered that saliva doesn't dissolve them, because I got these things stuck in my throat. It was like a wadded up Fruit Roll-Up caught in there, and I couldn't breathe....I literally thought I was going to die!
Alot of thoughts started racing through my mind. My first thought was that it really wasn't a bad way to go out. Another thought was that I didn't want to go out short of the main course, and I also wanted to live just so I could hear how the hell she was gonna explain this to the paramedics.
Anyway, the will to survive prevailed, and with a bit of self-Heimlich, I was able to reach in there and pull those damn things out.


....this thread may serve no purpose, but there's definitely a lesson to be learned here. If anyone reading this ends up in a situation like that.....remember to chew your food!!

That is all. Thank You, and have a good day!

That's the funniest story I have heard lately!
It could be an intro to a 70's porn
Or a scene from Rescue me!

Nonetheless, it would have been a story for the EMT office.

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[hambon4lif]

That's the funniest story I have heard lately!
It could be an intro to a 70's porn
Or a scene from Rescue me!

Nonetheless, it would have been a story for the EMT office.

I never looked at it that way before. I tend to think of it more as a public service message..

"if it saves only one life..." ya' know

[PETE'S BROTHER]

Default Viral Title Player

[VanHalener]

Drunk Dad At McDonald's Tells Kids To Bite Police

"During the scuffle, Alger ordered his children to attack the officers..."

Stupid Criminal Stories, Mugshots & Videos