"The Ched Chunkhead Opens His Insufferable Piehole And Inserts Both Feet" Thread

[BenJammin]

I know they've been quoted before in this thread... but still...

Hagar: What I've heard so far (ADKOT,) I wasn't impressed with at all, personally. I think in CHICKENFOOT, we've raised the bar a little bit on what a four-piece rock band can do

Unbelievable statement to make!

Sammy has only raised the bar on how big a douche someone can be.

[sadaist]

So do I. I was over in Idaho where they have a lot of Mexican farm workers and I went into this grocery store and found myself in the Mexican section and they had like these big quart bottles of Tapatio. I'm like hell yeah, I getting one of these! I almost can drink the stuff straight from the bottle. LOL!

Good tacos, Tapatio, and a bottle of lime Jarritos is a pretty good combination. That's pretty much what my kids like to eat. Dad might pretend to be the most interesting man in the world by having a Dos XX.

OMFG DUDES!!!

Saw this in the Circle-K today and bought them of course. AWESOME!!!

[sadaist]

This fucking twit really needs to STFU

Post #1 of a 41+ page thread of great fun. Everyone should go back to page 1 and thank Bob_R for this awesomely entertaining thread.

[NIN1211]

Post #1 of a 41+ page thread of great fun. Everyone should go back to page 1 and thank Bob_R for this awesomely entertaining thread.

I shall...when bored, I go back through the old posts and still laugh my ass off. THANKS ALL!!!

[BumBahDeeDah]

How are you laughing? I'm so annoyed. This guy just pisses me off.

Yeah, maybe it is funny.......

[sambo]

Tour pass from Spam's 82 tour...



Nothing's changed.....

[sadaist]

Tour pass from Spam's 82 tour...



Nothing's changed.....

No fucking way. Is that real?



Truth in advertising.



* I wonder now if For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge was Sams idea. All the stupid acronyms or whatever.

[Zing!]

Driving the kids home from swimming lessons yesterday and 'When It's Love' came on the radio (thank God they were asleep). As an interesting experiment in audio torture, I decided to see if I could get through the whole song without puking/turning off the radio. First off, it's just a horridly sappy song - and my immediate impression was: man, what the hell happened to Eddie Van Halen? This song proves that the Haggar years just neutered the guy creatively. The song had a decent guitar solo that kind of sounded like David Gilmore, but otherwise the Delilah radio-friendly keyboards and "nah nah nah's..." were enough to make my stomach churn - and I hadn't even gotten to Spammy's lyrics yet!

Man - where to begin? Admittedly, I haven't listened to this song in probably 20 years or more, but I can't imagine that I ever liked it - even when I was foolishly defending Ed back in the late '80's early '90's. Haggar's voice is awful in this song. Truly, truly awful. Almost as bad, in fact, as Cherone's on 'Van Halen III.' I could almost see this song being a template for how they recorded Gary on that album: "Sing like Sammy did on 'When It's Love' and you'll be fine." Grating, screeching, barely listenable. Spammy's vocals on any given song are suspect at best, but on this one track in particular, his voice is obnoxiously terrible - with a few notes being like a rubber glove fitted with roofing nails being dragged across the chalkboard in the 'Hot For Teacher' video. I made it through the entire song, but the residual effects were staggering. I had a stomach ache the rest of the night and had to down some Pepto before going to bed. Damn - what the hell was I thinking? Never again will I try to consume that much cheese in one sitting...

[Terry]

41 pages and still going strong!!

I typed: "Stupid Sammy Hagar quotes" in google

Radio Metal: Anyway, does that bother you when you hear people comparing Chickenfoot and Van Halen?

Hagar: Oh, no, I think it's fantastic. Really, it's fantastic. Are you kidding me? If you take Joe versus Eddie, you take Dave versus me, Wolfie versus Mikey, Chad or Kenny versus Al… I mean, come on! You know what I mean? Man for man, who can sing the best? Dave or I, today? Who can play the best? Joe or Eddie, today? Who could play or sing the best? Wolfie or Mikey? I think it's a joke. Sure, I love the comparison as long as it's fair. Not because you're a big Eddie Van Halen fan, you think that he's God, therefore you think that he's better than Joe; you have to be bipartisan and just listen and watch both of them play. Listen, I played with them both, I can tell you right now: there is no comparison today. Never mind the innovator that Eddie was. I'm talking about what they can play today.

So in other words, Chickenfoot is way better than Van Halen?

As individuals, absolutely! I've been in both bands, I can tell you right now. Take the new albums and compare them track by track and then tell me.

Oh dear.

Well, I suppose it'd be unfair to expect Hagar would come right out and say that Van Halen 2012 was "better" than Chickenfoot.

Personally, I have no interest in even listening to Chickenfoot to see how well they're playing or what they're playing this year and then comparing that to Van Halen.

It's just amazing that Hagar has to go on and on in various interviews about Van Halen...meanwhile, they have NOTHING to say about him. Roth did the same sort of thing in the 80s and 90s, but at least he had a sense of humor about it. Hagar comes off like he's desperate. Doubtless Van Halen 2012 is swamping Chickenfoot commercially in terms of album and ticket sales.

[sadaist]

I wanted to post this pic but didn't want to start a whole new thread. So why not in the Hagar Hate thread? lol And it does kinda fit the subject. Much like Sammy in Van halen......


You're doing it wrong.





Mustache goes over the top lip & just under the nose bro. You must have been really bad at pin the tail on the donkey. Either that or your bathroom mirror is from the funhouse.

[Nitro Express]

The first time I heard "Hellooooo Baybeeeee!" and then a lyric storyline that sounded like a horny ten year old I got ill.

[NIN1211]

The first time I heard "Hellooooo Baybeeeee!" and then a lyric storyline that sounded like a horny ten year old I got ill.

Dave would have turned this into something good..Spam talking about his appetite...should have been a warning sign to his future lyrical intentions..."PoundsCakes", "Hungry For Breakfast"..."Finish What Ya Started"(probably food related as well)....are we truly sure he isn't saying "Hellllllooooo Graaaaaavvvvvy?" in the beginning of this?

[SNIPER]

Ha. Even the album cover is gay !

[SNIPER]

I would agree that the music would have been cool with Roth doing his own thing. This was written the same time "Blood And Fire" was. Both were in that movie I think.

[Yount]

Good enough.

I reckon that's about the effort Van Halen put into their music post '85.