The bible states that Van Halen are a disgrace

[Redballjets88]

no one is offended, and if so they should just know that...

1. a homosexual male couldnt possibly mentrate

and

2. you meant faggot in a non homosexual way, but to convey a meaning of stupidity or dumbness

[VanHalener]

After reading the King James version, twice now, I still cannot find mention of Van Halen.

I had hope about finding something in Revelations, but nope.

[thome]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by rustoffa
[B]Instead of painting the doors, they shoulda blasted this!!!

LMFAO!!!

Me=The Shit!!!

Absolutely Mind Numbingly rite on Time .

Unbelievable Wonderment at the perfect Timing .

The Tubes in the Middle of their Heyday laying it DOWN!

OhmbliGoverously, Splendifferiissness, Blissstoniefied.!!.

I feel i should lay down the --five-- but jeez,(looked lately) maybe you should cash some of those in for 20s' or 50s' or something.

:D

[Seshmeister]

Originally posted by jhale667
Sounds like a correct interpretation to me!


Yeah, back in the day, the same asshats who tried to twist biblical verses to explain why I shouldn't be fucking their daughters
would always pull that one (the Corinthians verse) out of their asses when they started losing the debate...not like it helped their case....:D

LMAO!

There were debates? You should have filmed them.

[Dr. Love]

Hm, I'm not entirely sure, but I think the religious holidays (Easter, Christmas) bring out Sesh's anti-religious bent every year. Wonder if it's really that cyclical.

[cadaverdog]

Don't have a bible handy but I'm pretty sure one of the following verses says something about if you disagree about the long hair
bullshit , then forget about it.

It also says don't spill your seed on the ground , which some say
refers to masturbating.
If you use a sock and none hit's the floor , is that ok?

[Nickdfresh]

Re: The bible states that Van Halen are a disgrace

Originally posted by Seshmeister
[B]Oh fuck another reason I'm going to hell to be tortured by Satan and his little minions for all time...
....

To the tune of "Why Can't This Be Love" on repeat for eternity...

[VanHalener]

I was going to hell up until three days ago when I had my winter hibernation growth cut off.

Have not shaved in five days...

Am I in danger for having long facial hair?

[hideyoursheep]

Originally posted by VanHalener
Have not shaved in five days...

Am I in danger for having long facial hair?

Nah.






Only if you're a woman.


If you're a man whose woman has facial hair-



you're already in Hell!!
:p

[size5dress]

Originally posted by Seshmeister


The Old Testament is obviously just silly. You have Genises which is obviously silly. Adam and Eve.

Actuallly the old testament is a load of shit. THe guys who translated it didnt even KNOW old hebrew! they knew regular hebrew so they figured they could just take a swing at the translation. Thing is, alot of the words they tried to translate had 2 meanings. So they would change the meanings just so that it would match with the new testement [which they already understood]. So really, the translation of the old testement is just a load of crap made up to make the new testament look good. =)

[Seshmeister]

Originally posted by Dr. Love
Hm, I'm not entirely sure, but I think the religious holidays (Easter, Christmas) bring out Sesh's anti-religious bent every year. Wonder if it's really that cyclical.

It's like PMS for me...

Actually the reason I bumped this thread was the biblical shit about long hair came up in a post in another thread.

BUT - the reason I may sometimes start to whine about supertitious shit around holidays is that's when it especially affects normal people.

I'll give you an example.

Because of the superstitious 'ooh look at the magical full moon' bullshit decided at the Council of Nicea in 325 when they were inventing Chrisitanity as a way of controlling the population some fuckwit comes up with the genius shit that Easter should be the first Sunday after a full moon after the Spring Equinox.

Brilliant!...thank you so fucking much.

This means that Easter can vary by about 5 weeks each year.

I'll avoid the obvious point that Easter is based on the Jewish Passover and because the Jesus character was supposedly killed just after it is patently bullshit because no way would the Jewish faith allow executions at that time.

No I'll concentrate on 'Well how do my superstitions, sorry beliefs, impact on you?' thing.

Well this year pretty fucking significantly.

I'm owed $45 000 by a customer which they paid on Wednesday. I have a small company and this is a significant amount of cash to me. Banks for some reason hold on to money for 2 days on electronic transfers so anytime in the last 80 years it would have arrived in my account today.

But no not this time because the MAGICAL MOON has risen which means the heavens are up to something. Whoooo, ghosties.

So instead bank holidays for the superstition means I get my money on Tuesday costing me money as I have to pay staff before the money comes in because the power of the moon isn't a decent reason for people to suffer on back on Planet Earth.

Just sayin...

Cheers!

[Seshmeister]

Originally posted by Redballjets88
no one is offended, and if so they should just know that...

1. a homosexual male couldnt possibly mentrate

I mentrated once but I think I got away with it...

[thome]

Yee-- yay that---- know -eth noth speaketh ---within thy tounge

the moment-- of the thy -against thy brother in arms ---hand---- forgives the moment of--- the time

half a man in time is a man time in man in time is a

the moment of the yay that---- know -eth

<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zq5FeHzKtqw&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zq5FeHzKtqw&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>

Speaketh not against thy brother in arms on the field of woe......

[Nickdfresh]

Sesh: you're forgetting the fertility symbolism such as the Easter "eggs," bunnies (as in fuck like a rabbit), and the other symbols of spring (rebirth -- risen from the grave)...

[thome]

Originally posted by Nickdfresh
Sesh: you're forgetting the fertility symbolism such as the Easter "eggs," bunnies (as in fuck like a rabbit), and the other symbols of spring (rebirth -- risen from the grave)...

You must mean "Fukk-ing"' for prodiginy (sp) as in the egg reprsents birth of the future...farmers daughters....