Oh Christ? Another Repuke Debate?? (Live from the MonSatan "corn" fields on FAUX)

[Unchainme]

Topic: energy

NEWT: If we don't build a pipeline across the country and destroy the environment of the whole goddamned midwest, and create the world's largest terrorist target, then them Hosers are gonna sell OUR oil to Mitt's business partners, the Chinese

HUNTSMAN: We need to get off our addiction to Arab oil and replace it with an addiction to Canadian tar sand oil.

BATSHIT: BP and Halliburton destroying the Gulf of Mexico doesn't bother me. The Keystone pipeline destroying the Midwest doesn't bother me. It doesn't matter, because Jesus will rapture me, and I don't care how much the sinners suffer.

pRICK: Invokes 10th Amendment as an excuse to destroy the planet. Abolish all regulation of energy. Hell, I agree with Michele. Fuck this planet, I'm on the Jesus express to Heaven YEEEHAAWW.

Alberta=Texas from what I've heard. I mean look at the name of their hockey teams for gods sake.

[Seshmeister]

There is something absolutely and completely bullshit about anyone at all who claims to be against big government getting involved in any way at all at any point in adult sexuality.

I have never ever at any point heard any of these bozos try to defend the complete ridiculousness of that.

[FORD]

Topic: immigration

pRICK: I've been the governator of Texas for over 10 years, but it's goddamn Obama's fault that Arab terrorists from Hamas (WTF???) are dealin' drugs along my border.

MAN ON DOG: I'm gonna change it up a little here and throw some generic Chavez hate in here, and throw out some completely fictional claim that he's in league with Iran and Syria. What? We're talking about Mexico? Oh... who's going to Taco Bell, I'll take a 7 layer burrito and a side of Super Nachos.

MITTENS: We need a national ID card. Did I mention that Bain Capital just bought the company that makes them?

NEWT: If I can buy some shares of that company, I'm in. And I support the fascist laws in Arizona and South Carolina.

HUNTSMAN: Why are we worried about this? The economy is so fucked, the Mexicans aren't even bothering anymore. Of course 30 years of fucked up policies are to blame for that, but since this is FAUX, I'll blame it on Obama.

[FORD]

Topic: gay rights & abortion

MITTENS: Damn it, I've flip flopped on these issues so many times, even I forget what my stand is on them. Oh, and I only supported the assault weapons ban because the NRA told me I could.

MAN ON DOG: Mitt is a fag lover, and he knows it. He let those Sodomites get married in Massachusetts and wrote the marriage licenses himself!

MITTENS: Oh, go Google yourself, you frothy mix of lying bastard.

BATSHIT: Newt Gingrich is going to BURN IN HELL because he didn't defund Planned Parenthood.

NEWT: Suck it bitch. I've got a 98.5% rating from.... uh whichever right wing fringe group rates us on stupid shit like this.

BATSHIT: I'm a serious candidate! Marcus tells me so every night, as I'm doing him up the ass with a strap-on. Newt, stop lying about me.

NEWT: I tried to get rid of abortion, but Clinton vetoed it.

[FORD]

Topic: Reagan's 11th commandment (Thou shalt not bash a fellow Repuke)

MAN ON DOG: Bash away! Hell, what can they say about me that hasn't already been said for years?

pRICK: What do I care, I'm so drunk right now, I won't remember this tomorrow.

MITTENS: Don't bash me, bash Obama.

NEWT: Bashing? I'm not bashing anyone. These fucking idiots on this stage are all my friends, honest!

BATSHIT: You guys don't know what you're talking about. Reagan bashed all the time, so will I.

HUNTSMAN: I knew Ronald Reagan. I worked for Ronald Reagan. None of you dumbasses are Ronald Reagan.

[FORD]

Well thank Christ that's over..... now over to Current TV for "post game analysis"

[LoungeMachine]

Can we PLEASE stop calling these things "Debates" ????



And let your hair down, Michelle.....it's the only reason to pay attention to you when you speak.

[lesfunk]

I watched it for a little while and the only thing I came away with is the realization that every one of those motherfuckers has "crazy eye". I swear to Christ. They are all crazed.

[Unchainme]

I watched it for a little while and the only thing I came away with is the realization that every one of those motherfuckers has "crazy eye". I swear to Christ. They are all crazed.

It's like Satan has assembled an all-star team of candidates to lead us into the apocalypse.

[Nitro Express]

I'm just glad Nancy Reagan had the good sense to bury her husband under a big slab of concrete. It keeps the Republican Party from digging up the corpse and making it the new party leader.

[Nitro Express]

It's like Satan has assembled an all-star team of candidates to lead us into the apocalypse.

I'm waiting for the day when people will finally wake up to the fact that Israel is nothing but a shit hole not worth defending or fighting over and if Iran was really going to get us, they would have smuggled the nukes up in a shipment of drugs and Mexican migrant workers.

I used to have a neighbor who was born and grew up in Egypt. He always used to say there is nothing in the middle east worth killing our kids over. He became a resident of the US, married one of his students, and made some kids and was glad to be out of Egypt and always said Americans had no idea how good they have it.

[FORD]

I'm just glad Nancy Reagan had the good sense to bury her husband under a big slab of concrete. It keeps the Republican Party from digging up the corpse and making it the new party leader.

How do you know they haven't??

[Nitro Express]

I watched it for a little while and the only thing I came away with is the realization that every one of those motherfuckers has "crazy eye". I swear to Christ. They are all crazed.

Strange people and strange days indeed.