Illegal Immigrant Lawyer: Children Complaining Eggs are too cold

[ELVIS]

So, Imagine being in Obomba's shoes...

[FORD]

So you're saying the CIA is the reason my fucking cable bill is so high??

Well not directly.... but the CIA was founded by the BCE.... who also deregulated the cable industry to the point where you only have one regional monopoly providing internet service, and nobody is preventing them from charging you whatever the fuck they want.

[ELVIS]

The CIA was founded by the BCE ??



You sure it wasn't the Koch brothers ??

[FORD]

The original founding members of the CIA were the exact same crowd that caused the stock market crash in 1929, attempted to overthrow FDR in a fascist coup, and funded Adolf Hitler.

Prescott Bush, the Dulles brothers, etc.

[ELVIS]

The exact same crowd, eh ??

[ELVIS]

Disease, anyone ??

[Kristy]

So you're saying the CIA is the reason my fucking cable bill is so high??

That's what's known as "living the American Dream."


Dumbass.

[DONNIEP]

That's what's known as "living the American Dream."


Dumbass.

Quit yer yappin and get over here and let's snuggle!

[Kristy]

I'm not going anywhere near that cancer causing sludge, Mr. American Dream

[DONNIEP]

I'm not going anywhere near that cancer causing sludge, Mr. American Dream

I don't use that crap. I use Gain! Which you probably hate too. But, since it is you, I will make an exception and use one of your approved laundry detergents.

[Kristy]

Gain, huh? Is that always a Walmart special?

[DONNIEP]

Gain, huh? Is that always a Walmart special?

Hey - don't be shitting on Walmart again. That's where our wedding cake is coming from.

[DONNIEP]

I told em to swap out the Bud Light with Natural Ice, since you're all picky about beer and stuff.

[PETE'S BROTHER]

I'm not going anywhere near that cancer causing sludge, Mr. American Dream

that bear is so cute tho. like that mouse in your mouth

[ELVIS]

Racist! Racist! Racist!