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Back In Mother Fucking Business!!
BackIn Mother Fucking Business!!
IN DAVE WE TRUST
Guess who's back in circulation! We don't know what you might have heard but the outrageous, drunken leader of the Reform (Van Halen) Party is once again leading the charge for rock n' roll fans everywhere. Sarge himself has announced that the DLR Army is "back in motherfuckin' business." Time to storm the castle, rescue the damsel in distress and make it to the bar just in time for Happy Hour (complete with a complementary nacho bar)! After a brief leave it's time to re-enlist Weekend Warriors, and fight to support Diamond David Lee Roth and his army of supporters.
This is the pure, uncut, uncensored, unadulterated stuff. This is where classic Van Halen is celebrated (and mourned) and Diamond Dave reigns as the supreme toastmaster of the immoral majority, the King of Any and All Things Rock n' Roll.
So where have we been, what have we been up to? Stockpiling weapons of mass entertainment, conquering foreign bands and, in general, laying waste to a rag-tag army of Sammy Hagar fans (what the fuck is a Waborita anyway?) who got in our way. "There is only one singer for Van Halen, and that's David Lee Roth." We agree. And we'll fight for the right of all Dave fans to make their voices heard. Nobody rules these streets at night but us. More obnoxious
and obstinate than Jesse Helms after a scotch and Viagra milk shake, join our growing legion of fans dedicated to honoring the Commander in Chief of Rock n'
Roll - David Lee Roth.
[originally posted January 2000]
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