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Here's the scenario:
It's World War III -- a clash of civilizations between Western democracy and Muslim fundamentalism. And you're in it.
You have A LOT to live for -- a cool, fun, anatomically perfect wife who's a nymphomaniac, a great mother, and doesn't like to overspend (I know, I know, but that's the beauty of hypothetical situations -- you get to dream), a couple of perfect kids who think you're the man, a lucrative career, two homes, and -- of course -- a young mistress on the side.
All you have to do is get out of this war alive.
On routine patrol, your unit comes under fire. You quickly realize that you're dealing with Al Quaeda's "Bitch Brigade" -- a particularly fanatical unit of the enemy made up of a mix of (1) Mujahedeen fighters trained by Bin Ladin himself, (2) VHLinks members; and (3) people who fill the on-stage bleacher seats at Sammy Hagar concerts. This unit is known for its cruelty and hatred of the American way of life, as well as for being notorious cross-dressers and connoiseuers of bad music. You know from the stories of what this unit does to its prisoners that, if the battle doesn't go your way, you are better off putting a bullet in your head. And you are prepared to do that, if need be.
Whether you get out alive will depend in large part on the guys in your foxhole with you. Again, this is life or death. Are they courageous? Loyal? Someone you can trust with your life? You'll need those qualities around you, because you are in a world of shit right now.
So, who do you want in your foxhole?
1. David Lee Roth
2. Edward Van Halen
3. Alex Van Halen
4. Bass Player
5. None of the above
I go with "None of the above" -- at least if I want to live. I'l throw some CVH on the stereo when I'm back home safe.
What say you?
It's World War III -- a clash of civilizations between Western democracy and Muslim fundamentalism. And you're in it.
You have A LOT to live for -- a cool, fun, anatomically perfect wife who's a nymphomaniac, a great mother, and doesn't like to overspend (I know, I know, but that's the beauty of hypothetical situations -- you get to dream), a couple of perfect kids who think you're the man, a lucrative career, two homes, and -- of course -- a young mistress on the side.
All you have to do is get out of this war alive.
On routine patrol, your unit comes under fire. You quickly realize that you're dealing with Al Quaeda's "Bitch Brigade" -- a particularly fanatical unit of the enemy made up of a mix of (1) Mujahedeen fighters trained by Bin Ladin himself, (2) VHLinks members; and (3) people who fill the on-stage bleacher seats at Sammy Hagar concerts. This unit is known for its cruelty and hatred of the American way of life, as well as for being notorious cross-dressers and connoiseuers of bad music. You know from the stories of what this unit does to its prisoners that, if the battle doesn't go your way, you are better off putting a bullet in your head. And you are prepared to do that, if need be.
Whether you get out alive will depend in large part on the guys in your foxhole with you. Again, this is life or death. Are they courageous? Loyal? Someone you can trust with your life? You'll need those qualities around you, because you are in a world of shit right now.
So, who do you want in your foxhole?
1. David Lee Roth
2. Edward Van Halen
3. Alex Van Halen
4. Bass Player
5. None of the above
I go with "None of the above" -- at least if I want to live. I'l throw some CVH on the stereo when I'm back home safe.
What say you?