First off, I realize this in an international discussion forum. For those that don't know, "Kroger" is a grocery store that has a formatted music thing they pump in. Pretty genre unspecific stuff...Country, R&B, Kelly Clarkson.....just everything. The particular Kroger referenced in this post is kinda "ghetto." It's really not a racist term (ghetto) if you live around Atlanta.
Anyway, "Jump" comes on the Kroger radio, while I'm shopping with a handgun in my jacket. Avacados? They're fixin' to go way up in price due to the recent inclement weather in California...I was sorting through 'em when Roth's voice rang across the PA system.
"Can't ya see what I mee-eeeen??"
Kinda timely...no-one else noticed.
Next stop? The chicken department. I'm rifling through the Tyson shit that's on sale....skinless/boneless breasts'...$1.99 a pound.
Here it comes again:
"Can't ya see what I mee-eeeen??"
This time, there was a backup singer. It was the fucker stocking the stand-alone-cooler. The dude looked like a svelt Barry White...just singing right along.
Being more than interested in what the fuck was going on, I casually asked, "guess the muzak gets old after awhile huh?" He goes, "It's not Muzak." Before I could say anything else, he goes, "That's a Van Halen song...you know about Van Halen and shit?" I'm like, "yeah, didn't mean to insult the muzak and shit." He started laughing....I did too.
Just on a whim, I go, "you know Van Halen is finally getting into the Hall Of Fame, right?" He goes, "with that other singer?" I went, "looks like it's gonna be both of 'em."
Eat this fucking shit and smile folks....Roth Motherfucking Army exclusive:
"That's fucked up....the shit with the other singer was some mainstream bullshit...that old Van halen shit needs to stay separate."
This is the end...the last and most important part of this bizarre exchange.
I go, "so it's ok for the mainstream shit to go in the Hall Of Fame?"
"The livers are on sale next week...fuck 'em."
Anyway, "Jump" comes on the Kroger radio, while I'm shopping with a handgun in my jacket. Avacados? They're fixin' to go way up in price due to the recent inclement weather in California...I was sorting through 'em when Roth's voice rang across the PA system.
"Can't ya see what I mee-eeeen??"
Kinda timely...no-one else noticed.
Next stop? The chicken department. I'm rifling through the Tyson shit that's on sale....skinless/boneless breasts'...$1.99 a pound.
Here it comes again:
"Can't ya see what I mee-eeeen??"
This time, there was a backup singer. It was the fucker stocking the stand-alone-cooler. The dude looked like a svelt Barry White...just singing right along.
Being more than interested in what the fuck was going on, I casually asked, "guess the muzak gets old after awhile huh?" He goes, "It's not Muzak." Before I could say anything else, he goes, "That's a Van Halen song...you know about Van Halen and shit?" I'm like, "yeah, didn't mean to insult the muzak and shit." He started laughing....I did too.
Just on a whim, I go, "you know Van Halen is finally getting into the Hall Of Fame, right?" He goes, "with that other singer?" I went, "looks like it's gonna be both of 'em."
Eat this fucking shit and smile folks....Roth Motherfucking Army exclusive:
"That's fucked up....the shit with the other singer was some mainstream bullshit...that old Van halen shit needs to stay separate."
This is the end...the last and most important part of this bizarre exchange.
I go, "so it's ok for the mainstream shit to go in the Hall Of Fame?"
"The livers are on sale next week...fuck 'em."

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