Van Halen and Casual Sex can Stop Terrorism, so says FOX News

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  • LoungeMachine
    DIAMOND STATUS
    • Jul 2004
    • 32576

    Van Halen and Casual Sex can Stop Terrorism, so says FOX News

    We Report. You Decide. GO Search FOXNews.com

    Stop Terror With Sexual Healing
    Friday, July 20, 2007

    By Greg Gutfeld

    It's not religious fervor or a rejection of the West. It's a hatred for life, stemming from a lack of sexual opportunity.



    The possibility of sex is what gets men out of bed in the morning. It's what causes men to build things and work out. But, when there is no possibility, it's what causes men destroy things and stop bathing.

    Democracy is sweet, but it's not seductive. If anything, it's the superficial greatness of America — our stupid sex-drenched pop culture — that converts people to freedom, not speeches about freedom.

    The solution to hatred against the West is not democracy, but something simpler: airdropping sex packages.

    Well, maybe not sex packages, but care packages that offer a sampling of the very best of America. I am referring to Van Halen 1, some HoHos and the entire catalog of AC/DC. I know, they're Australian — but Australia really is an American state, with wallabies.

    We should also send 20 years worth of Playboy. Sure, it's cheesy, but have you seen the articles? They're crap, but I read them for the naked pictures. Plus, Playboy could probably make more headway in a burqa-burdened society, than a forum with Tom Friedman.

    Casual sex isn't the solution for terror. But the potential for it is.

    Sex offers more opportunity for wishful, pointless thinking than anything else in life — and without it, you're left with a lot of angry men whose genitals stink of goats.

    And that's my gut feeling.

    Originally posted by Kristy
    Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
    Originally posted by cadaverdog
    I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?
  • TAKIN WHISKEY
    Commando
    • Apr 2006
    • 1190

    #2
    This guy seems to have a good grasp on reality. Rock n Roll, Playboy, might as well drop a few thousnads pounds of Kind while we're at it. lol

    Comment

    • Redballjets88
      Full Member Status

      • Mar 2005
      • 4469

      #3
      wow i can't believe Fox would even allow the article to be published, let alone credit Van Halen where credit is due
      R.I.P Van Halen 1978-1984

      hopefully God will ressurect you

      "i wont be messing with you in future.the fearsome redballjets88 for fear of you owning me some more" Axl S


      " I liked Sammy Hagar " FORD

      Comment

      • Antman
        Commando
        • Jan 2004
        • 1261

        #4
        I find it ironic that while this administration wants to spread democracy and freedom in Iraq, we're losing it here.
        When the shit hits the fan, close your mouth and duck.

        Comment

        • clod speeney
          Full On Cocktard
          • Jan 2004
          • 26

          #5
          Originally posted by Antman
          I find it ironic that while this administration wants to spread democracy and freedom in Iraq, we're losing it here.

          You're right. Like, not having the freedom to post on rotharmy.com.

          Your statement is penned worse than "Only time will tell if we stand the test of time."

          Your avatar is making me thirsty...
          The jellies kicked out the jams...

          Comment

          • Nickdfresh
            SUPER MODERATOR

            • Oct 2004
            • 49563

            #6
            There onto something here...

            I was listening to Franken on one of his last shows where he was interviewing some scholar that had extensively written on what made young Muslim men into terrorists...

            One of the main conclusions was lack of opportunity to meet women. Not necessarily even in the line of casual sex. It was more the prohibitions against dating out of one's social class, even prohibitions of working class Muslim from dating at all while the moneyed classes could pretty much do what they wanted. Marriages were arranged with strict rules on dowries and all that shit. And their opportunities for marriage/girlfriends were severally restricted along what amounts to a caste system (using Egypt as an example) where the corrupt elites maintain the status quo...

            It makes for very bitter men when not only are they not allowed to date, but they also must observe a double standard when women are the exclusive territory of those with money...
            Last edited by Nickdfresh; 07-26-2007, 07:12 AM.

            Comment

            • Nickdfresh
              SUPER MODERATOR

              • Oct 2004
              • 49563

              #7
              Oh shit, I just realized this isn't my forum. LOL:D

              Comment

              • Nitro Express
                DIAMOND STATUS
                • Aug 2004
                • 32942

                #8
                Sex is a huge motivator. When I was young I was on fire for sex, and it motivated me more than money. I wanted the money because I could get more sex with it than without it.

                I'll admit it, women rule the world because all the men want is pussy.

                The middle east needs a big blow job. They actually do have some good looking women over there and some of those Iranian Persian beauties are hot! Unrap the women and lets have a makover. Hood up and fuck.
                No! You can't have the keys to the wine cellar!

                Comment

                • VanHalener
                  ROCKSTAR

                  • Nov 2006
                  • 5451

                  #9
                  Originally posted by LoungeMachine


                  Well, maybe not sex packages, but care packages that offer a sampling of the very best of America. I am referring to Van Halen 1, some HoHos and the entire catalog of AC/DC.
                  Mr Gutfeld, we need to talk...

                  BASTARD! Sending only Van Halen 1.

                  And PLAYBOY? WTF? There are much harder core mags out there.
                  Mr Flint, I'm going to need an air drop.
                  ~Only you can prevent low volume~

                  Comment

                  • TAKIN WHISKEY
                    Commando
                    • Apr 2006
                    • 1190

                    #10
                    Baby steps

                    Comment

                    • hideyoursheep
                      ROTH ARMY ELITE
                      • Jan 2007
                      • 6351

                      #11
                      -"but Australia really is an American state, with wallabies."

                      I wonder how much Rupert paid this guy?.......

                      Comment

                      • Nitro Express
                        DIAMOND STATUS
                        • Aug 2004
                        • 32942

                        #12
                        Originally posted by vanhalener
                        Mr Gutfeld, we need to talk...

                        BASTARD! Sending only Van Halen 1.

                        And PLAYBOY? WTF? There are much harder core mags out there.
                        Mr Flint, I'm going to need an air drop.
                        A buddy of mine spent a year and a half in Iraq. When he flew into Kuwait the first thing that blew him away was all the porn for sale and the same in Iraq. They are major horn dogs over there. What they need is a jolly good fuck to free their minds from the Islamic brainwashing.
                        No! You can't have the keys to the wine cellar!

                        Comment

                        • binnie
                          DIAMOND STATUS
                          • May 2006
                          • 19145

                          #13
                          Originally posted by Nitro Express

                          The middle east needs a big blow job.
                          That, my friend, is the quote of the century.

                          Absolutely outstanding.
                          The Power Of The Riff Compels Me

                          Comment

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