HUGE VAN HALEN UPDATE: Van Halen’s 2011 Plans and The TRUTH Behind The Rumors

[WARF]

Rumor: Valerie Bertinelli is a fat whore who broke up Van Halen.

Partially TRUE: There is no denying Valerie is a whore that broke up Van Halen... but let's refer to her as pleasently plump shall we??

[PETE'S BROTHER]

Rumor: WARF is fucking wasted right now.

True: WARF is drinking four loko and watching Miami Vice.

you rootin' for crockett or tubbs?

[PETE'S BROTHER]

Rumor: Valerie Bertinelli is a fat whore who broke up Van Halen.

Partially TRUE: There is no denying Valerie is a whore that broke up Van Halen... but let's refer to her as pleasently plump shall we??

n-n-n-no

[VHscraps]

It doesn't say Eddie is playing the fucking bass. Read it again.

Some of you dudes need to go back to the 4th grade and pass your reading comprehension tests. READ the fucking thing for fuck sakes.

I read it, man - but what you have to do with all things VH is read between the lines. When the execrable, over-produced, horribly-titled F.U.C.K came out he spend endless interviews pussyfooting about the bass 'cos he was hawking a new MusicMan six-string bass that he played on it, but he didn't want anyone to know it was him. But, y'know, on that stupid song 'Spanked' any idiot could tell it was him playing it, 'cos it sounded too lame to have been the kind of part a proper BASS player would lay down.

So, we'll see. Demoing the bass never stopped him edging out Mike Anthony in the past - and my guess is that Wolfie ain't Jack Bruce.

[DavidLeeNatra]

so...2011 will be the year =VH= is hopefully letting a fart go up in the air...while osammy bin hagar will give us his autobiography...to which he was kindly asked to add some dirt about the van halen years...

I guess we'll have something to talk about anyway...

[SilvioDante]

Serious question here...

I do understand the ramifications for asking this....

After all we've seen and been thru with this band....

Really, does anybody seriously believe any of this at this point????????

[DaveTheScott]

I'll believe it when I'm standing in the pit with that shit live in front of my baby blues. Period.

RUMOR: Most fans will give a shit less if Dave isn't in the band.
TRUE.

[DaveTheScott]

Meaning no one will give a shit about VH without Dave...in case that didn't come out clear (it didn't). FAIL.

[Halen High]

Exactly! This is good news. Can't wait for the leaks from the studio sessions.

[Number 47]

I think it sounds plausible. I was a bit concerned about this producer, John Shanks, but as someone else above said - it's gotta be better than letting Eddie produce?? That would be the worst of all worlds. And after a bit of looking around I notice that Shanks produced the 2003 album by Jane's Addiction, Strays. I'm no fan of that band, but I do remember the tune 'Just Because' on MTV and always liked it - it gets better as it gets to the chorus and beyond:.

Jane's Addiction - Strays was produced by Bob Ezrin (Kiss, Alice Cooper, Pink Floyd)

[DavidLeeNatra]

I'm reading Dave's book again, as it is always near my bed that I can go through some chapters from time to time. now I'm close to finish it all the way through again. makes perfect sense. and one thing is clear...one day it will be over and dave will most likely be the last man standing...and THEN he will tell...I'm not holding my breath if the sisters get their shit together to produce a new record...but I'm holding my breath to get the rest of the drama...

[jero]

no problems this time.

[sonrisa salvaje]

My biggest question is will there be keyboards?

[fryingdutchman]

I won't be excited until I hear a new single.

There are way too many "what if's?" hiding in this "insider" statement. It seems like every time some information gets offered up, it comes along with a bunch of caveats and disclaimers that almost serve to discredit the statement completely.

Until the word parsing stops, I won't believe a goddamn thing.

[Nitro Express]

Jane's Addiction was a bunch of egomaniacs, shooting smack, and sucking each other's dicks. No wonder Jane got addicted.