Osama bin Laden was a Van Halen fan

Collapse
X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • Golden AWe
    DIAMOND STATUS
    • Jan 2004
    • 34245

    Osama bin Laden was a Van Halen fan

    We reveal which artists fill up the iPods of the world's most evil men (Eric Clapton: look away now)


    "Music is the flute of the devil." So remarked al-Qaeda head-honcho Osama bin Laden in the 1990s. In fact, such was his animus towards all things melodic that according to Lawrence Wright's terrorist-trashing tome, The Looming Tower, Osama stopped attending his beloved horse races because the Khartoum track had the nerve to install a house band.

    All of which sits uneasily with what Sudanese poet Kola Boof has to say about the world's most-wanted man. Namely, his penchant for Spandex-clad cock-rockers and camp new wavers with scary beehives. In her autobiography, Boof claims that in 1996 she was kept as a "sex slave" by bin Laden in Morocco, where he would "become this devout party boy who wanted to hear Van Halen or some B-52s. To this day, I would hear the song Rock Lobster in my sleep. I would be jerking around like a white girl … 'Dance like a Caucasoid girl!' he would say."

    Osama's highest praise, however, was reserved for Whitney Houston, who was "the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen". Such was his love of the infidel chanteuse, Boof remembers that he wanted to arrange a meeting with Houston, buy her a mansion in a Khartoum suburb and have Bobby Brown killed. Note to FBI: want to spring Osama from his Flintstones-like existence? Spreading word on the Tora Bora grapevine that Brown and Houston have now divorced might do the trick …
    Hmmm...it doesn't say whether it really was Halen or Hagar...Whitney Houston would point to Hagar...
    Originally posted by Cato
    Golden, why are you FAT?
    Originally posted by lesfunk
    Much like yourself as the Jim Morrison of Nazi bunker flies
    http://i167.photobucket.com/albums/u...TheDMCross.jpg
  • Cato
    Full Member Status

    • Jan 2004
    • 4587

    #2
    ahh...this reminds me of WARF's old post, "Saddam Hussein had a CD of Skyscraper!"

    anyone remember it?
    Don't notice most of my posts are less than 2 lines...




    Fender Custom Shop Owners Club


    Gibson Custom Shop Owners Club

    Cato's YouTube Channel

    Comment

    • Golden AWe
      DIAMOND STATUS
      • Jan 2004
      • 34245

      #3
      Originally posted by Cato
      ahh...this reminds me of WARF's old post, "Saddam Hussein had a CD of Skyscraper!"

      anyone remember it?
      You are referring to WARF as "it", not as "him"?

      He's not an animal you rascist asian pig!!!
      Originally posted by Cato
      Golden, why are you FAT?
      Originally posted by lesfunk
      Much like yourself as the Jim Morrison of Nazi bunker flies
      http://i167.photobucket.com/albums/u...TheDMCross.jpg

      Comment

      • FORD
        ROTH ARMY MODERATOR

        • Jan 2004
        • 59586

        #4
        Osama actually had an account here for a while back around 2004/2005.

        Was it really him? Damned if I know, but I ran the IP once, and it traced to Jeddah, Saudi Arabia.

        Some of his old posts are still around if you search for them.....

        Originally posted by Osama Bin Laden
        I like Ted Nugent. He would make an excellent terror.. uh... freedom fighter for the glory of Allah.
        Eat Us And Smile

        Cenk For America 2024!!

        Justice Democrats


        "If the American people had ever known the truth about what we (the BCE) have done to this nation, we would be chased down in the streets and lynched." - Poppy Bush, 1992

        Comment

        Working...