Dave's Social Media Returns this Sunday, Feb. 7th

[Von Halen]

Dave is so full of it - he keeps the windows open on the tour bus? Bwahahahaha!!!

Well, unless the smell of cleaning chemicals is too strong! Or unless it fills up with smoke like Cheech and Chong's car!

I once had the pleasure of watching Dave choose a new tour bus, after the one he was riding on broke down yet again, between gigs. They brought in three tour buses, and lined them up back stage. Dave walked on one, did the sniff test, looked around, and then did the same thing with the next two. He finally settled on the one that had previously been Brittany Spears' former tour bus. I'm thinking it may have smelled like more like her sweet pussy, than cleaning chemicals, and that's why he chose that one. As you can imagine, it was a bad ass bus.

[Anonymous]

Well, unless the smell of cleaning chemicals is too strong! Or unless it fills up with smoke like Cheech and Chong's car!

I once had the pleasure of watching Dave choose a new tour bus, after the one he was riding on broke down yet again, between gigs. They brought in three tour buses, and lined them up back stage. Dave walked on one, did the sniff test, looked around, and then did the same thing with the next two. He finally settled on the one that had previously been Brittany Spears' former tour bus. I'm thinking it may have smelled like more like her sweet pussy, than cleaning chemicals, and that's why he chose that one. As you can imagine, it was a bad ass bus.

I would think that if there was one prevalent smell on Britney's tour bus, it would be cock & cum.

Did he shine a blacklight on the seats?

[Von Halen]

I believe you, you just seemed more pissed off lately.

Which I can perfectly understand, of course.

Yeah man, I am pissed off. Pissed off at the way this band, including Dave, treats their most ardent supporters.

[Von Halen]

I would think that if there was one prevalent smell on Britney's tour bus, it would be cock & cum.

Did he shine a blacklight on the seats?

He did not use a blacklight, but probably should have.

You choose to think about the smell of cock and cum, I choose to think about the smell of Brittany's sweet pussy.

[Anonymous]

Yeah man, I am pissed off. Pissed off at the way this band, including Dave, treats their most ardent supporters.

You may have missed it, but when Dave launched his fantastic website, I was here flipping tables, kicking the furniture & yelling "Fuck off, Dave".

Like I already told you, I was called a sheep.

The irony was so absurd, I came down with an illness & was bedridden for two solid days.

[Anonymous]

He did not use a blacklight, but probably should have.

You choose to think about the smell of cock and cum, I choose to think about the smell of Brittany's sweet pussy.

I'm pragmatic. You're a daydreamer.

[Von Halen]

You may have missed it, but when Dave launched his fantastic website, I was here flipping tables, kicking the furniture & yelling "Fuck off, Dave".

Like I already told you, I was called a sheep.

The irony was so absurd, I came down with an illness & was bedridden for two solid days.

No, I didn't miss it. I am in 100% agreement with your testimony! Preach it!

[Von Halen]

I'm pragmatic. You're a daydreamer.

I daydream about the smell of sweet pussy. You pragmaticize (I made that word up) about the smell cock and cum.

[DONNIEP]

Well, unless the smell of cleaning chemicals is too strong! Or unless it fills up with smoke like Cheech and Chong's car!

I once had the pleasure of watching Dave choose a new tour bus, after the one he was riding on broke down yet again, between gigs. They brought in three tour buses, and lined them up back stage. Dave walked on one, did the sniff test, looked around, and then did the same thing with the next two. He finally settled on the one that had previously been Brittany Spears' former tour bus. I'm thinking it may have smelled like more like her sweet pussy, than cleaning chemicals, and that's why he chose that one. As you can imagine, it was a bad ass bus.

Are you sure it wasn't because her bus was pink and sparkly? Lol.

[Von Halen]

Well I listened to the whole thing.

How, how could you possibly sit through that whole thing? That is 23:19 of your life, you'll never get back.

Just think, Dave wasted hours and hours of his life, putting together that 23:19!

[DONNIEP]

cock and cum.

Isn't that the name of that band Ford is always posting videos of?

[Anonymous]

I daydream about the smell of sweet pussy. You pragmaticize (I made that word up) about the smell cock and cum.

That's... not really how it works.

And I highly doubt Britney's pussy exudes a "sweet smell".

She looks like the type who pulls up her panties after being creampied & doesn't wash it for days, if not weeks.

[Anonymous]

How, how could you possibly sit through that whole thing? That is 23:19 of your life, you'll never get back.

Just think, Dave wasted hours and hours of his life, putting together that 23:19!

It's not like those hours are worth anything...

[Von Halen]

The guy that supposedly despises the wasting of time, wastes more of his time, than anyone on the planet. All the time he spent at that Rodeo, or wherever the fuck he was, and the time recording that diatribe, could have been spent working on the official releases of the old shows. Or writing a new album. Or figuring out how to release the John 5 album. But no, he'd rather put out some bullshit that 99.99% of the people on earth don't give a flying fuck about.

[DONNIEP]

How, how could you possibly sit through that whole thing? That is 23:19 of your life, you'll never get back.

Just think, Dave wasted hours and hours of his life, putting together that 23:19!

Well, part of the time I was taking a dump so it wasn't completely wasted time. Besides, if I don't suffer through it how am I gonna bitch about how bad it sucks? Plus I was holding out hope he'd sing over the music in the background and sound awesome. Well, he screeched and warbled, sadly it wasn't awesome. Sounded just like that crap he did on his radio show every morning.