Herman Cain sings Lennon & Was "Framed"

[Unchainme]

This seems like something FORD would have posted lyrics to as a parody. Damn.

[FORD]

John Lennon once said that he got the name "Beatles" from a dream where a man appeared to him on a flaming pie. Maybe it was a pizza pie, and the man was Herman Cain coming through some space-time portal?

[Seshmeister]

I think Lennon said a lot of stuff to amuse himself and confuse journalists.

[FORD]

I think Lennon said a lot of stuff to amuse himself and confuse journalists.

occasionally with disastrous results......

[Nitro Express]

Real life is stranger than anything you can make up. What a fucking freak show. As the late great George Carlin once said,"Life is a freak show and when you live in America, you get a front row seat."

[Seshmeister]

Yeah I listened to a documentary about modern exorcists today and for the first 20 minutes I couldn't make up my mind if it was a spoof or not.

It wasn't.

[hambon4lif]

nein...nein...nein

[FORD]

Right about now, Herman probably really IS trying to imagine there's no pizza, because he fucking ruined Godfather's.......

TASTE TEST: Herman Cain Turned Godfather's Into Cheap And Crappy Pizza
Kim Bhasin | Oct. 19, 2011, 9:09 AM

Godfather's pizza apparently sucks.

At least that was the overwhelming conclusion from Politico's recent blind taste test.

They lined up five pizza brands -- Godfather's, Papa John's, Pizza Hut, zpizza and Ledo Pizza -- in front of Republican strategist and restaurant writer Doug Heye, Democratic commentator Karen Finney and foodie Nycci Nellis, publisher of TheListAreYouOnIt.com.

All three of them rated Godfather's dead last. Here are their comments from before they knew which slice was which, from Politico:

“It’s the most unappetizing,” said Nellis after just one bite. “The cheese is really sour! The crust is like a sponge.”

“That is so bad,” said Finney.

“The crust is trying to be thin crust and thick crust, it can’t make up what it is,” said Heye. “Not good.”

Was it always this crappy?

Republican presidential candidate Herman Cain made a lot of changes to turn the company around when he bought it back in 1986, by revamping its marketing and cutting costs.

But it looks like somewhere along the line, the product itself suffered.

(In case you're wondering, a medium 11" Godfather's single-topping pizza costs $9.99).

Link

[hambon4lif]

I'm trying to 'imagine' he isn't a delusional, pepperoni-pimping, Fed shill, clown motherfucker.........

...........and it ain't workin'.

Herman Cain

[Seshmeister]

It's kind of weird the US pizza companies that have managed to make it big with international franchises.

Off the top of my head over here it's Pizza Hut, Dominoes and there are a few Papa Johns.

They really are pretty fucking shit barely better than the cheapest frozen supermarket pizzas. It makes you wonder what makes a successful company, it seems it's much more about money and marketing than actual product. I can just about by making very unusual choices get an edible one but you can't tell me that Pizza Hut is the best pizza that could come out of the US. 700 of them over here which is about half as many as the US by population. A fucking culinary dream though compared to Dominoes jeez.

I guess it's incredibly profitable. If you ever make your own pizza you soon realize that an extra portion of say mushrooms equals 2 mushrooms, pennies.

[FORD]

Pizza Hut is owned by the same company that owns Taco Bell and Kentucky Fried Chicken. All three used to be owned by Pepsico, but apparently this was one of the last cases where the US Federal Government actually thought a junk food company was monopolizing too much of the market. So the restaraunt chains are now allegedly a seperate corporation, (Yum Foods, or something dumb like that) but its funny how they still do national cross promotions with Pepsi-branded high fructose corn poison beverages, and Frito-Lay chips (the other part of the Pepsi mega-goliath-beast that was forced to spin off.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure Pepsi was pushing the international expansion of all their brands right around the same time, probably starting in the early 1990s.


As far as Godfathers goes, Cain didn't actually control the chain until 1992 or so. He was working for the Pillsbury Dough Boy in 1986, when they put him in charge of Godfathers, and he talked Pillsbury into selling him the company in 1992. Ironically enough, when Pillsbury bought Godfathers, they didn't even really want the company, but were actually after a huge stake in the Burger King chain. Apparently the largest BK franchisee also owned Godfathers, so it was a package deal.

I can neither confirm,nor deny that Cain and his partners paid $99.9 million for the company. What I can confirm, is that it wasn't until the mid 1990s that the pizza started losing quality, and then they started losing franchises. As I said in another thread, I was actually shocked to hear they were still in business, since every franchise I knew of, from here to fucking Port Hardy BC long ago ceased to exist.

[Seshmeister]

I actually think McD's are far from the worst of them these days.

With the Super Size Me movie and some other stuff I think they have genuinely tried to make a bit of an effort to give some information out and offer some other options.

People scoff at that but I'm all for the information. I genuinely would never have guessed that a McChicken Sandwich had more fat than a Big Mac for example. If I take the kids for an emergency meal and keep them to low fat juice and a fruit bag instead of fries it's probably one of the least unhealthy fast food options out there.

I do sometimes worry though at the horrendous employment exploitation that must be involved to provide those amazing Happy Meal toys from China so try and keep it to once a month or so.

[Seshmeister]

Sorry I've gone insanely off topic.

[Nitro Express]

Pizza Hut used to be good in the 1980's but sucks now and Kentucky Fried Chicken was good when the Colonel was in charge of it. It's greasy, fatty, sludge now that sits in your stomach like an anvil and then you get the shits. Fortunately we have plenty of good local pizza joints and if you are in the right area of the country, good chicken as well. You pretty much have to stay away from the chains and eat local which is my preference.

[Nitro Express]

The bright point of living in New York was the mob was laundering a lot of money through pizza parlors. They wanted to keep the places busy and you could get a large coal baked New York pie for $11. For me it's the crust. I can't stand the crust most chains have smothered in a bunch of sludge toppings. Man that mob pizza was good.