I Think We Need An Official "Discuss Britney Spears Here" Thread in the Pen.

[Matt White]

SHOCKING

[binnie]

Not too sure about these recent reports (sounds too good to be true)

I think they're from a Brit newspaper that I wouldn't trust as far as I could throw.....

[Anonymous]

Well, I live in Portugal and even I know any story from the News of the World is made up and that stories from the Sun aren't much better...

Besides, seeing as it is a newspaper, you can't throw it very far, anyway. Especially if it's windy and it's blowing in your direction. ANd even if it's blowing in the opposite direction, that wouldn't count as a throw, would it?

Cheers! :bottle:

[The_KiD]

Britney Spears can kill anyone she wants! Britney Spears cuts off heads ALL the time and doesn't even think twice about it. This chick is so crazy and awesome that she flips out ALL the time. I heard that once Britney Spears was eating at a diner. And when some dude dropped a spoon Britney Spears killed the whole town. My friend Mark said that he saw Britney Spears totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window.

Check it out here: http://seanbonner.com/realultimatebritney/

I wonder what would happen if Britney Spears fought against a ninja? I think the universe would explode and they'd have to call in Chuck Norris to put it back together.


KiD

[Matt White]

"I'm crushing your head...CRUSH CRUSH CRUSH...."

[The_KiD]

Britney portrayed as "The Hulk"... LOL...

KiD

[The_KiD]

There's a bidding war going on (currently around $150,000) for a security tape showing Britney Spears changing into a bikini and fishnets with two dancers at New York's One nightclub last month. The two dancers were fired after management discovered the video of them doing some "serious partying" with Britney.

"The manager said there was a tape of them," said our spy. "Both the girls cried about it when they got fired, but they didn't deny it. There's a camera above the office back there that can see that whole room."
Who would want to see Britney Spears changing into a bikini and fishnets? Five years ago maybe, but now it'd just look like some special for National Geographic. The video could be of a beached humpback whale and all the bidders would be like, "Is that? Is that Britney? Are you sure? Did she lose some weight or something?"

KiD

[ppg960]

wow Kid, your firing on all eight cylinders tonight!!

[The_KiD]

The Daily Star claims Britney Spears is facing "bankruptcy" after spending $21 million of her $32 million fortune in the past two years and is "scared to death" of the financial situation she faces when she leaves rehab. A family friend says:

"She has to concentrate on staying sober, but she can't do that if she has to worry about going broke - which is exactly what she thinks will happen."

I don't know how $11 million is even close to bankruptcy, but whatever. In another Britney story, the Daily Star claims she was caught making out with another patient in the bushes. A source says:

"Britney and her new male friend decided to play a game of tennis. Britney is allowed a little more freedom now she's been in the centre a while. The next thing they had sneaked off into the bushes and were getting pretty passionate. They weren't actually having sex but there was definitely some groping. We had to step in to separate them. They were told off. They're in rehab and relationships between vulnerable people aren't really encouraged."

So Britney Spears is broke and trying to have sex with drug addicts in bushes. I dunno about you but she sounds cured. Once she gets out I wouldn't be surprised if she worked her way up to become President of the United States. Or the Pope.

KiD

[bueno bob]

I love Britney!

Really, I do!

[Anonymous]

You're a sick puppy, Bob.

Cheers! :bottle:

[Matt White]

HA!!!


A WINNER EVERY TIME!!!

[The_KiD]

Britney Spears is on the loose

Britney Spears has finished her one-month stay in rehab and has left the facility. Her manager announced in a statement late last night that she "has been released by the Promises Malibu Treatment Center after successfully completing their program." The typical stay at Promises is about 45 days but Britney stayed for 27 because, well, she's Britney Spears.

I give it less than a week before she starts drinking again and heads back out to the clubs. And by clubs I mean hitting up a restaurant and ordering a "deep fried piggy covered in Cheetos and chocoate. I'mma gonna eat it all up!"

KiD

[hankster]

anyone think she shaved her head just to get rid of all the meth and coke evidence that her hair would have revealed during a certain custody case that is on going, or is she getting ready to go on SNL and rip a pope pic up. by the way, I feel bad for that dog

[Matt White]

She was on the tube last night.....

She is "crazier than a shit-house rat"...........

and as dumb as a stump