Bin Laden dead

[ashstralia]

I'm not buying any of this... Not one bit.

hearin ya vain. my bullshit detector is clanging too.

[VanHalener]

And now a word from our sponsor...

[kwame k]

Write a book or start a web blog now.....if you want to get in on the action early because this is going to be a cash cow and the mother of all conspiracy theories.

[ashstralia]

http://www.smh.com.au/technology/technology-news/how-one-twitter-user-reported-the-osama-bin-laden-raid-without-knowing-20110502-1e5ba.html

interesting....

[chefcraig]

Write a book or start a web blog now.....if you want to get in on the action early because this is going to be a cash cow and the mother of all conspiracy theories.

"How A Dream Encounter With Aliens Led Me To Track Down Osama bin Laden"

- From Sammy Hagar's Facebook Page

[kwame k]

"How A Dream Encounter With Aliens Led Me To Track Down Osama bin Laden"

- From Sammy Hagar's Facebook Page

The man knows no shame

[Seshmeister]

http://newsthump.com/2011/05/02/osama-bin-laden-left-hugely-disappointed-by-quality-of-virgins/

Osama Bin Laden left hugely disappointed by quality of virgins

Recently deceased former Al Qaeda leader Osama Bin Laden is said to be furious about the quality of virgins he has been given in the afterlife, also insisting that his new home is a little on the hot side.

Upon arrival at what he thought was Heaven, Bin Laden was shown to a small shed on the shores of a lake of fire which will be his home for eternity.

Osama told our medium, “Every time I complained that this isn’t what Heaven is meant to be like, the tour guide would laugh and say ‘yes, this is “heaven”‘ – always using those annoying air quote things.”

“I demanded my virgins, like any good martyr, but what they brought me is entirely unacceptable.”

“The line-up looks like the queue outside a Chicago Rock Cafe in Basingstoke – there is a very good reason these women are still virgins.”

“And some of them definitely look like they’ve been around the block a few times. One of them is passing around photos of her kids.”

One of Bin Laden’s new hosts told us, “Look, actual genuine virgins are almost impossible to come by these days, so if they’ve got less than ten partners they count, alright?”

A spokesperson for the virgin community said that it was not only Bin Laden who felt cheated by the arrangements.

One told us, “We’re not overly happy about it either, truth by told.”

“When we signed up for this gig we were told it was eternity with a great warrior, who was a hero to his people – not the world’s most wanted terrorist. My mum always said I should read the fine print.”

45 year-old virgin and computer game enthusiast Kevin Simms told us, “I wasn’t really paying attention when they offered the gig, I was too busy taking on Al Qaeda in Call of Duty on my Xbox. Oh the irony.”

“On the bright-side, he seems to be suffering a bit of ‘stage-fright’ downstairs, so this might not be so bad after all.”

[Nitro Express]

Write a book or start a web blog now.....if you want to get in on the action early because this is going to be a cash cow and the mother of all conspiracy theories.

Let me start then. Here we go...... Bush could have gotten Bin Ladden but he was advised not to because so many of his advisors and buddies were making money off of chasing him. If they got him they wouldn't be able to make as much money and control the US population using terror as the excuse.

Since Obama was a former CIA asset and had ties to the Bush network he allowed it to go on. Now that he has a second election to win, Obama gave the ok to kill Bin Laden because it would help shore up his reputation as president.

Hows that?

[chefcraig]

I make no claims toward being some sort of Nostradamus-like figure, yet I will make this prediction and you can take it to the bank:

In the next 5-10 years, the number of reports by "credible witnesses" claiming to have seen Osama bin Laden in the nation's rural gas stations and convenience stores will quickly surpass the amount of various "sightings" of Elvis Presley and Big Foot combined (in generally the same locations) over the past 25 years.

[PETE'S BROTHER]

I make no claims toward being some sort of Nostradamus-like figure, yet I will make this prediction and you can take it to the bank:

In the next 5-10 years, the number of reports by "credible witnesses" claiming to have seen Osama bin Laden in the nation's rural gas stations and convenience stores will quickly surpass the amount of various "sightings" of Elvis Presley and Big Foot combined (in generally the same locations) over the past 25 years.

nostracraig or chefdamus....hmmmmm?

[Hardrock69]

Now they are saying they have confirmed through DNA that it was, in fact, bin Laden.

BULLSHIT!

DNA TESTING TAKES A LOT FUCKING LONGER THAN 24 FUCKING HOURS!

[chefcraig]

Interesting to see what this does to the polls.

On the ever sliding scale of U.S. political thought, it probably ranks somewhere below "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!" and slightly above Gerald Ford's "Win buttons".

nostracraig or chefdamus....hmmmmm?

Both are in the running for names of my planned up-scale/low priced diner.

[Etienne]

Justice has been done, congratulations from Switzerland!

[Nitro Express]

The big corporations love Obama as do the unions. Too many people are worried the Republicans will take their government benefits away. Obama is not popular with the people who run their own businesses but sadly there are less and less of these people. Obama is a big corporation, big government, and big union president and too many people in the US benefit from all three. Many of these people see Obama as a liar and a fake but they still see him as the lesser of the two evils. They will vote Obama over any Republican.

Unless there is a hotter than shit independent candidate to get enough votes from both sides, Obama will be hard to beat because the corporations will back him and a good percentage of the american public will back him out of fear of the republicans cutting the money off. So it looks like we are going to spend ourselves into the abyss while the corporations make record progress and we have less consumer choices out of fear of losing a government check.

[Nitro Express]

This will be all forgotten around election time anyways. What will be stinging everyone severely will be the weak dollar. Food and fuel prices will be through the roof and there will be less employment as ever. Of course a guy like Obama will think that's good to justify big social programs. They seem to be an easy sell in shitty times. unless someone is trusted more than Obama to sell a better solution, he's basically going to win from default. Whether this all is some grand global government conspiracy or just the result of stupid shit greed can be debated.