No Israel in Ten Years?

[Kristy]

I don't think Sesh is gay.

Here's the gay:

Asscarackasmr is closet gay
Mushroom is gay to everyone but himself
Nick secretly wants to be gay
Mr. Vengeance was gay and wants to be gay again
That little Australian kangaroo humper is only gay with animals

[ELVIS]

Your Liberal arts education has gotten you far...

[Kristy]

Whereas your trailer park education has made you a troll.

[Satan]

Terry
When it's time to function
as a feeling human being, will your
Bachelor of Arts help you get by?

Peter
I hope to study further,
a few more years or so. I also hope
to keep a steady high

[Kristy]

The Dumbellvis Trailer Park U curriculum

The Dumbellvis Trailer Park U Quad

Neighbor Propane Tank Stealing 3 credits In this course students will learn how to steal propane gas to heat their Walmart Pot pies from their neighbor while they are out at the local welfare office.

Neighbor Cable Stealing 2 credits In this course, the student will demonstrate how to "tap in" into his neighbors cable feed. Course activities include how to order crap on the internet trying to use a Medicaid card, internet trolling, Obama blaming and the vast knowledge of anti-government conspiracy sites. Honey Boo-Boo and Duck Dynasty will be watched all season as a visual alternate to pop up books.

Trailer Park Landscaping 5 Credits Course requirements will include how to hang a rusting Chevy engine block from a tree limb, mosaic driveway oil stains, Lynyrd Skynyrd Confederate flag displays, how to plant a flowerbox in the 1974 Ford Torino that has been on cynder blocks for the past 35 years, lawn dart and rotting garden hose leaving and playing Brad Paisley too loud until the police show up with a citation. All students will be required to bring their own 1974 Ford Torino to class.

NASCAR History 4 credits Students will learn the basics of all NASCAR tracks and drivers. Activities include Dale Earnhart worship, limited edition NASCAR plate collecting, E Bay NASCAR autograph gouging and a 1 page philosophy essay on what it means to turn left for 4 hours.

[DONNIEP]

The Dumbellvis Trailer Park U curriculum

The Dumbellvis Trailer Park U Quad

NASCAR History 4 credits Students will learn the basics of all NASCAR tracks and drivers. Activities include Dale Earnhart worship, limited edition NASCAR plate collecting, E Bay NASCAR autograph gouging and a 1 page philosophy essay on what it means to turn left for 4 hours.

First off, we teach NASCAR in the schools down here. Right along with the Bible, just as Jesus Himself commanded.

Second, how cool would it be if that was a big ol long zip line and you could ride it in that smashed up Bug? Holy hell, even you can't deny that would be fun.

[DONNIEP]

Now, let's all bow our heads and say the blessing before we have lunch, here at the Roth Army...

[Kristy]

There will be no Bible reading at Dumbellvis U. Why? Those ACLU "Libtards" that's why. Which leads to

ACLU Libtards 1 credit In this course, the student will demonstrate how to hate liberals, women, anyone who isn't white and the Federal Government. Requirements are bringing a loaded gun to class, lack of dental care and a severe case of paranoia.

[DONNIEP]

There will be no Bible reading at Dumbellvis U. Why? Those ACLU "Libtards" that's why. Which leads to

ACLU Libtards 1 credit In this course, the student will demonstrate how to hate liberals, women, anyone who isn't white and the Federal Government. Requirements are bringing a loaded gun to class, lack of dental care and a severe case of paranoia.

I don't care what the class is, hell it could be Allah Worship for all I care, if I get to carry one of my pistols to school I am IN!!

[Kristy]

Second, how cool would it be if that was a big ol long zip line and you could ride it in that smashed up Bug? Holy hell, even you can't deny that would be fun.

You are confusing that with the Dumbellvis U athletic program.

[DONNIEP]

You are confusing that with the Dumbellvis U athletic program.

There's gonna be an athletic program too? Please tell me there's a class in Yard Darts...

[Kristy]

Trailer Park Inbreeding 3 credits


In this course, the student will learn what it means by "keeping it all in the family." Tattoos, lack of a high school education and abortion clinic protesting are prerequisites.

[Kristy]

There's gonna be an athletic program too? Please tell me there's a class in Yard Darts...

Lawn darts will not be offered in the fall. Instead, there will be a Skynyrd "booty shaking'" aerobics class.

[DONNIEP]

Trailer Park Inbreeding 3 credits


In this course, the student will learn what it means by "keeping it all in the family." Tattoos, lack of a high school education and abortion clinic protesting are prerequisites.

I saw that chick at the Shake Shack last nite!!

[DONNIEP]

Lawn darts will not be offered in the fall. Instead, there will be a Skynyrd "booty shaking'" aerobics class.

I'd sign up for that if it was .38 Special.