I wonder if this works

[Coyote]

Re: I wonder if this works

Originally posted by Don Corleone
Tom Hagen did a search today on Alien Abductions, and came across this let web page:

http://www.alien-technology.com/abduction/request_abduction.shtml

We took the liberty of signing Sammy up for another Abduction

Bravo! *standing ovation*

[Nickdfresh]

December 5, 2004

METROPOLIS / PASSING THROUGH
They're Here


MICHAEL T. JARVIS
Earthlings have been fascinated with stories about space aliens for centuries, but now we live in the era of the ufologist. In the last decade or so, the study of UFOs has become a cottage industry thanks to countless films, books, TV shows, websites and a popular national radio show. The National UFO Conference held its 41st annual convention during Halloween weekend at the Renaissance Hollywood Hotel. We landed at a speakers mixer to ask some of the experts what's out there.

*

Bob Wood

Retired Aerospace Executive

Newport Beach

What is your specialty?

Authenticating documents, mostly government documents, allegedly leaked by people who believe the truth should be out.

What convinced you that alien ships visit Earth?

Documents leaked from governments are pretty much adequate to convince a person that we have been recovering crashed flying saucers since 1941, when they first crashed in Cape Girardeau, Mo.

If aliens can fly spaceships, why don't they communicate with Earth?

For the same reason in "Star Trek" why they didn't interfere with developing societies. There's probably half a dozen to a dozen [alien] societies involved. A couple seem to be bad guys, but most are good guys.

Best movie involving UFOs?

"The Day the Earth Stood Still."

*

Dr. Lynne D. Kitei

Physician/Educator

Paradise Valley, Ariz.

What is your UFO specialty?

I'm the only person to photograph global unexplained phenomena

on both 35-millimeter and video from the same vantage point

before, during and after a historic mass sighting.

What drew you to the UFO field?

In February 1995 my husband called me to look out the window, and there were three amber orbs in a triangle formation. I shot a picture. It seemed as if something was looking back at me. On Jan. 22, 1997, two months before some mass sightings in Phoenix, the lights came back.

The next night three lights appeared again, and I got them on video.

Did you go public right away?

No. I just came forward recently. I did a lot of soul-searching about this.

Where is the best place to look for UFOs or aliens?

Maybe we're looking in the wrong place. It might not just be interplanetary, it might be inter-dimensional.

*

Peter B. Davenport

Director, National UFO Reporting Center

Seattle, Wash.

What is your UFO specialty?

I wear many hats. We provide the American people and the world a clearinghouse for UFO reports.

All of our material is available to the public at no charge, and on the Internet, http://www.ufocenter.com .

I'm trained as a biochemical geneticist. I used to work as a Russian translator in the Soviet Union. I'm the founding president of a biotech lab.

What drew you to the UFO field?

In July of 1954, I and hundreds and hundreds of people at a drive-in theater saw a UFO. It was at Lambert Field, now the St. Louis airport.

Why would aliens want to abduct people and then return them?

The problem with the question is it has a terrestrial bias. You're using the term "abduction." I prefer "interaction."

Why would the interaction occur?

You're going to have to poll the aliens on that.

Do you ever look at people and wonder if they might be aliens?

Are you including people in politics and the White House?

*

Robert Salas

Math Teacher

Ojai

What is your UFO specialty?

I'm a witness. I was a missile launch officer in 1967 at Malmstrom Air Force Base in Montana. I was monitoring 10 nuclear missiles one morning 60 feet underground.

A guard yelled into the phone that there was an orange-red object hovering outside our front gate.

All of a sudden our missiles start shutting down one by one.

If aliens can pilot spaceships, why don't they communicate with Earth?

Actually I think this incident was a communication. All they did was shut down our missiles. I think they're communicating that basically we're going to destroy ourselves with these nuclear weapons and we have to stop using them.

Why would the government hide evidence of UFOs?

They want the technology for national security reasons, for weaponry.

If an alien wanted to stay with you, would you agree to that?

If he or she wanted to have a trusting relationship with one human being, certainly I would honor that.


Samuel Hagar

Rock Musician (sort of)

Cabo St. Lucas, Mexico

What is your UFO specialty?

Getting anal probes. I really enjoy when the insert large objects into my rectum; espescially when it's the searing, heated energy rods!

Why would aliens want to put things in your anus?

They apparently are pissed off that I ruined classic Van Halen with my screechy voice and pathetically gay lyrics. So I guess you could say it's a form of revenge or punishment.

Didn't you dedicate a song to the visitors?

Yes. And they were very upset that I insulted them with my typical blabbering nonsense. But I was being sincere!

When's the last time you saw an alien?

It's been awhile now. I think they are offended by by smell.

*

[Panamark]

The Aliens are pissed with Mikey.
They cant get anywhere near Sammy's butthole lately.

[Don Corleone]

I wonder if Al is an Alien?

[Don Corleone]

He sure as hell looks like one

[Panamark]

Al-ien

Sammy's confessions that he has been butt probed and
had his brain downloaded via his ass..

Its all making sense !!

SOME KIND OF AL-IEN
WAITS FOR THE OPENING
THEN SIMPLY PULLS A STRING
SAM'S BRAINS CAVING IN !

[Fat Wolfie]

Some say Jesus was a ******.