Eddie gets pissed at Cleveland columnist

[ELVIS]

Where's the original review ??

[twonabomber]

Originally posted by Figs
Nice work, twonabomber...

I wonder why this guy's review got to him, there have certainly been mixed reviews of this shit tour already.

i laughed my ass off this morning after reading that shit...

do like i did and email this guy for havin' the balls to run that...jsoeder@plaind.com

[twonabomber]

original review...

Hagar helps revive band's chemistry

Monday, July 05, 2004

John Soeder
Plain Dealer Pop Music Critic

"Go ahead, Cleveland - turn your clocks back!" singer Sammy Hagar instructed the audience during Van Halen's two-hour time warp of a performance Friday night at Gund Arena.

The venue was about four-fifths full. Aging frat boys with a beer in one hand and a beer in the other dominated the crowd.

They had ample cause for celebration. Hagar was back in the hard-rocking fold, dude, alongside the Van Halen brothers - guitarist Eddie and drummer Alex - and bassist Michael Anthony.

The foursome announced its return to the tune of "Jump." Too bad an abysmal mix, later improved, buried Hagar's vocals and the canned synthesizer accompaniment.

For those keeping score at home, Hagar replaced original Van Halen singer David Lee Roth. After Hagar and the band had an ugly falling-out, Roth returned briefly. Then the group gave Extreme's Gary Cherone an ill-fated try.

These guys go through vocalists the way J.Lo goes through grooms.

Nonetheless, all was well with Hagar aboard again in concert, at least when Van Halen revisited "Runaround," "Top of the World," "Why Can't This Be Love," "Best of Both Worlds" and "Right Now."

Hagar steered clear of some high notes in "Dreams," however. And he was less than convincing on such Roth-era favorites as "Unchained," "Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Love" and "Panama."

Compared with Roth, Hagar has a stronger set of pipes. But he can't muster the egomaniacal swagger crucial to the material popularized by Diamond Dave.

For his part, Eddie was none the worse for wear despite a bout with tongue cancer and hip-replacement surgery in recent years. Throughout the night, he was never at a loss for a fleet-fingered guitar solo or a rip-snorting riff.

Then again, at 49, Eddie is the "baby" in this group. The other band members are in their 50s.

They went out of their way to exchange hugs, high-fives and slaps on their behinds. The nicey-nice was excessive, if not flat-out forced.

A tracklike stage allowed the band to interact with fans. Hagar, for one, seemed hell-bent on autographing every last souvenir tossed his way.

"When It's Love," the final encore, drove home the rekindled chemistry within Van Halen's ranks.

OK, fellas, we got it: You don't want to kill each other anymore.

Rounding out the set list were a couple of ho-hum new tunes, "It's About Time" and "Up for Breakfast." The latter was rife with eye-rolling double entendres.

"Gotta get up! Gotta get up!" Hagar sang. Quite possibly, he wasn't referring to rolling out of bed.

Viagra Halen, anyone?

To reach this Plain Dealer reporter:

jsoeder@plaind.com, 216-999-4562

[ELVIS]

"And in my opinion, what you do is judge God," he said.

Was he saying somehow the almighty had a hand in 'Runnin With The Devil' and 'Hot For Teacher'?"

[wooda]

I those new songs came from God, then the age old question "Does GOD have a sense of humor?" is finally answered.

YES!!!

[classicdude]

Someone see if that reporter will share Mr. Van Halen's cell phone number. I believe a few folks on this site would like to share their "opinions" with him....

BTW, nice job twonabomber.

[Va Beach VH Fan]

Strange why it was cut off so much, thanks Twona....

And to think...

This guy's review was quite tame compared to some of the reviews since the tour started....

Those guys better bring their cups to work....

[Roth kills Sam]

THIS JUST IN:

Man-With-Half-Tongue is out of his friggin mind!

[Paul Belfi]

EVH Is Losing It

It's a little sad to see someone as amazingly talented as Eddie Van Halen say the kind of things that he did in this interview...

I mean - it's only a rock band with an amazing guitar player - that's it.

This 'And in my opinion, what you do is judge God' shit is quite disturbing. And for EVH to get weirded out about the mention of David Lee Roth tells me that Edward still has a MAJOR inferiority complex as far as DLR is concerned.

The audacity for EVH to say that DLR is 'out of his (expletive) mind' is laughable in light of Edward's comments relative to God and his music.

I loved the writer's comment: 'Was he (Eddie) saying that the Almighty was responsible for "Runnin' With The Devil" and "Hot For Teacher"?'

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Paul

[Paul Belfi]

This interview was in Sunday's CLEVELAND PLAIN DEALER - ARTS / J1. It was not available online but because I found this to be one of the most bizarre interviews I have ever read with Eddie Van Halen I had to share this with you... the man has lost his mind.

He's amazingly talented, but the cheese is DEFINITELY off of his cracker - if you don't believe me read on...


Splitting Hairs With Van Halen - John Soeder

So I got a voice mail the other day at 3 a.m. from Eddie Van Halen.

The virtuoso guitarist took exception with my review of his hard-rock band Van Halen's concert July 2 at Gund Arena.

"Music, to me, is my life," he said. "How could you critique something that just is, you know?

"I don't claim to write the music. It just comes through me. ... If you don't like it, why do you come?"

Eddie then offered a quick critique of me. "I think you're a disgruntled human being," he said. Ouch!

"Are you jealous 'cause you're not us, or what?" he said. "Are you envious?"

Truth be told, there was the time I went to a party the summer after my senior year of high school and stood around all night with a bunch of other guys, pathetically playing air-guitar along with Van Halen's "1984" album.

"What is the deal with people like you?" Eddie demanded. "You actually get paid for doing this (expletive)?"

To answer his questions:

1. In all honesty, sometimes I have to wonder myself.

2. Actually, yes.

"If you want to, you can call me on my cell phone," Eddie said, proceeding to leave his number.

" 'Cause it's me ... Ed ... Van Halen. OK?"

There was no reason to doubt it. I recognized his voice, having interviewed Eddie a few years ago.

The following afternoon, I took a deep breath and gave him a ring.

"Hi, Ed? It's me ... John ... Soeder."

I couldn't resist.

"Hi, John," Eddie said. Van Halen had performed the previous evening in Detroit and was at the airport, waiting to catch a flight to New York City.

"I've never, ever called a critic," he said. "This is the first time I've ever done that in my life."

This was a first for me, too. I've never had a major rock 'n' roller call to complain about a review.

"You're the only person in close to 30 years of doing what I do - I don't know, I just had a wild hair up my (expletive), and I felt like calling you," Eddie said.

If I ever write a memoir, the title will be: "I Put a Wild Hair in Eddie Van Halen's (expletive)."

I thanked him for the feedback.

"Who died and made you queen?" Eddie said. "Do you have a Ph.D. in music?"

Well, no. Then again, neither does Eddie.

"Believe it or not, I can't even read music," he said. "I'm self taught. Where the songs come from, I don't have a clue, OK? It just comes through me.

"Why do you think I play so bizarre? Because I don't know what the (expletive) I'm doing!"

Nonetheless, I have no right to judge anyone, Eddie told me.

I'm not trying to pass judgment on a personal level. As a critic, my job is to offer my opinion - hopefully, an informed opinion - about a concert, a CD, whatever.

Eddie insisted I should start every review with the words: "In my opinion..."

It would be redundant, I countered. Reviews, by definition, are supposed to be opinionated.

We went round and round about critical theory. I finally said we are splitting hairs.

"No!" Eddie said. "It's a major hair!"

Look - we're all entitled to our opinions. Mine are no more or no less valid than yours or the next guy's in the audience.

"But those people don't have the opportunity to be a critic in a newspaper, to voice their opinion," Eddie said. "You have the power to touch a lot of people, just as I do."

Concertgoers and readers are free to make up their own minds, I said. If they agree with me, cool. If not, bring it on.

"Have a little more compassion," Eddie said. "In a twisted way, what you do is hurt a lot of people's feelings."

There was a pause. Then he added: "You're not hurting mine. I'm not pissed off at you. I'm just trying to pick your brain."

Het, everyone's a critic, right?

"No!" Eddie said. "I'm not."

Oh, come on - surely when he's with buddies, he might weigh in on the merits of, say, a particular album.

"That's the thing: I don't listen to anything," Eddie said. "You're talking to a very, uh, unorthodox individual here."

This was rapidly becoming apparent.

"I listen to nothing because God lays so much music on me every (expletive) day - I don't have the time," Eddie said. "It's three-quarters of the reason why I'm not married anymore. Because, you know, it's 3 o'clock in the morning, and I'm up because God is knocking on my door, giving me ideas."

I'm still not sure why Eddie was so bent out of shape by my concert critique, which ran under the headline: "Hagar helps revive band's chemistry."

Granted, the review wasn't an all-out rave. I quibbled about the sound quality and took singer Sammy Hagar to task for not bringing the same swagger as original Van Halen vocalist David Lee Roth to some of the band's older material.

When it came to the Hagar-era songs, however, the group was on the money, which is what I wrote.

"I found your review amusing because you don't have a clue what goes down," Eddie said. "You know my guitar solo - for the first time in my life, I don't have a set thing I'm doing. I'm totally letting go.

"The hip replacement, cancer, divorce - you name it I beat it all. ... I'm not afraid of getting on top of the stairs, falling down and hoping to land on my feet, OK?"

Eddie and actress Valerie Bertinelli split in 2001. One year earlier, he was treated for tounge cancer. He had hip-replacement surgery in 1999.

"So I'm doing my guitar solo," he said. "I'm doing some amazing (expletive) I've never done because I allow myself to feel. Ninety percent of the humans on this planet won't allow themselves to feel, let alone deal with what they're feeling, then heal, you know?"

This is all well and good. But I didn't miss Eddie's guitar solo. In fact, I wrote: "Throughout the night, (Eddie) was never at a loss for a fleet-fingered guitar solo or a ripsnorting riff."

Maybe he had me confused with another critic.

"OK," Eddie said. "Look, the funny thing is it's not about me. It's not about you. It's not about anything. Music is the universal language.

He couldn't fathom why I mentioned Roth in the review.

"That (expletive) has nothing to do do with what we're doing now," Eddie said. "If you knew Roth the way I do, you would go 'This guy is out of his (expletive) mind!'

"Why did you even have to bring up Roth? He wasn't on-stage."

True. But didn't Roth help popularize some of those songs and write the lyrics to them?

"Uh, a few of 'em," Eddie said. "But Roth and Hagar are two unique individuals. You can't say Hagar didn't sing it the way Roth did. Of course (Hagar) can't. He's not Roth."

Long before I did this for a living, I was a Van Halen fan. I bought the albums. I bought tickets to the concerts. I bought the t-shirts.

I'm still a fan.

"Well, what do you want from me?" an exasperated Eddie said. "I can't give you something I don't have."

We talked for nearly an hour. Toward the end of the rambling conversation, Eddie said he'd enjoyed our discussion. He told me to keep in touch.

"I'm not a rock star," Eddie said. "I'm a musician. And I'll be damned if someone is gonna tell me what comes through me is not what they expected."

The music comes from God according to Eddie.

"And in my opinion what you do is judge God," he said.

Was he saying the almighty somehow had a hand in "Runnin' With The Devil" and "Hot For Teacher"?

I told Eddie I'd have to reflect on that one and get back to him.

"One thing I am is consistent," he said. "I'm not blowing smoke up my own (expletive), but at my worst, I am still me. Nobody else can do me."

You do it well, I assured him.

"There you go judging me again," Eddie said. Then he laughed.

OK, let me rephrase that: In my opinion, Eddie Van Halen does Eddie Van Halen well.

"Thank you sir," he said.

[Matt White]

Wow!!! That was truly amazing. ONE mention of Diamond Dave and Ed goes off his nut!!! It is truly sad that this guy is SO FUCKING jealous of Dave. In-fucking-credible! He's a mess! It is extremely disturbing, to think that 18 years after Dave split that this guy STILL gets that worked up when his name is mentioned along with Van Halen. Its no wonder that Eds in therapy. Ed needs to get his money back from his shrink though, 'cause its obvious that he is haunted by the fact that DAVID LEE ROTH IS VAN HALEN!!!!

[Terry]

Ed's off his gourd.

[scottydabodi]

Ed's fucking RETARDED

Ed is SUCH a fucking NIMROD!! He should shut the fuck up about all this "God" crap and get down to some SERIOUS PLAYING!! If I wanted to hear about God in Rock, I'd buy a GODDAMN STRYPER CD, ASSHOLE!!!! Wake up, and get the doorbell, the men in white are here to take you, your fat kid, and half a tongue AWAY TO THE FUNNY FARM!!! DLR made VH rock ass!! He should get down and thank Dave EVERY DAY for making him, and the other losers in VH FUCKING FAMOUS. Without Dave, they are NOTHING but a fading blip on the radar.

[ELVIS]

Originally posted by Paul Belfi
This interview was in Sunday's CLEVELAND PLAIN DEALER - ARTS / J1. It was not available online but because I found this to be one of the most bizarre interviews I have ever read with Eddie Van Halen I had to share this with you... the man has lost his mind.

He's amazingly talented, but the cheese is DEFINITELY off of his cracker - if you don't believe me read on...


Splitting Hairs With Van Halen - John Soeder

Umm.. like this is what this thread is about 'n stuff...

[Bill Lumbergh]

And all the Van Hagar fans think Dave is whacked out?!