Eat Us And Smile: EVOLUTION

[WARF]

Loons, houseofpain, redfire, hain, pojo.... where the hell are you?!!?

[Loons The Great]

The Loons iz in de room!

Ol' EUAS iz combat ready!!

Ol' Number 13!

13 years...2 epic, momentous tours with Diamond Dave quarterbackin' the mighty, mighty Van Halen!...1 mind-roastin', blues-boastin', tell the truth but tells it well rip-roarin' record,...well wella wellaah....All Hail Yeaaah!

What's next??
'I am not an adventurer by choice but by fate.'-Vincent Van Gogh

Ya gots to get right wid God
Fill yo heart wid luh-ve

"Well, we’re all in the cosmic movie, you know that! That means the day you die, you gotta watch your whole life recurring eternally forever, in Cinemascope, 3-D. So you better have some good incidents happenin’ in there... and a fitting climax!"--Jim Morrison, introducing ‘Been Down So Long’ at Cobo Arena, Detroit Michigan, May 8, 1970

Don't know where I'm goin', I'se jus' keep on rollin'...,,,___

If you wants to be happy, be.


Like a bolt of lightning in yo steel-cut oatmeal, boi!!

[WARF]

Yez yez yez....wella wlla well.... Ole' Blind Willie Loons mussa' lost his pissword!!!!

Loonz in back in dis mofo!!!!!!

[Muchos En Fuego]

I heard you missed us, we're back!

[WARF]

To whom dis may concern,

You've probably heard rumors dat Van Halen n' I'ma not be consummatin our highly publicized reunion. I ain't talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch fo' realz. And since neither Edward, Alex, nor Mike have corroborated or denied tha ghetto hype, I wanna go on record wit tha following: Eddie done did dat shit.

It aint nuthin but no secret, nor is I ashamed of mah unbashed rapture all up in tha prospect of resurrectin tha original gangsta Van Halen. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch fo' realz. A "couple joints" was all I knew fo' shizzle when Edward n' I gots together three months ago ta write em. At dat time, tha crew tip-toed round mah crazy ass sprinklin sentiments like, "this aint shizzle thang, Dave!" dis don't mean anythang long term, Dave.... we still auditionin' other thugs, Dave." I was cool. I was happy. I was up in tha moment.

Da next thang I knew, tha four of our asses is bustin surprise strutt-on at tha MTV Awards. I holla'd at Edward at dat time dat I didn't be thinkin it was a phat scam fo' tha crew ta git all up in New York half-cocked; n' dat I didn't wanna Imply by our presence dat we was "back" if up in fact it was just a quickle fo' oldschool timez sake.

Well ain't hind sight always 20/20...Had I axed fo' suttin' up in writing, dis wouldn't have happened. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Had I bigged up tha occasionizzle icy grip up in mah stomach, maybe dis wouldn't have happened. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! But I didn't. Like I holla'd--rapture fo' realz. And, I gots a straight-up boner fo' these hoes. Do I trust them, biatch? That question never entered mah mind.

Then, a seriez of events last week hustled mah crazy ass ta discover at bout the same time tha press did, dat tha crew, along wit they manager, had already hired another lead thug, possibly as long as three months ago. I wonder how tha fuck he felt tha night of tha MTV Awards. Well shiiiit, it certainly explains why on dat night Edward looked as uncomfortable as a playa whoz ass just signed a thugged-out deal wit Da Devil. I can't be thinkin of a reason Edward would lie ta me bout bein considered fo' tha lead thug when dat schmoooove muthafucka had already hired one of mah thugs, and then let me step tha fuck up on MTV under tha impression dat there was great likelihood dat Van Halen n' I was reunitin fo' realz. As I holla'd, I told his ass up in no uncertain terms dat I didn't wanna do tha MTV gig as a funky-ass crew unless we was up in fact, a funky-ass band.

And so I apologize ta mah hustlas n' mah supporters, n' ta MTV. I was a unwittin participant up in dis deception. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Well shiiiit, it sickens me dat the "reunion" as peeped on MTV was not a god damn thang mo' than a publicitizzle stunt. If I be guilty of anything, I be guilty of denial. It aint nuthin but tha nick nack patty wack, I still gots tha bigger sack. I wanted ta believe it just as much as any suckas. Those whoz ass know me know that trickery was never mah style.

DA O.G. WARF

[Anonymous]

That's a very tis-ight letter, Warf. Now all da brothers & sisters know da REAL DEAL about dat fiasco of a reunion. - aww yea foo. Cheers! :bottle:

[ashstralia]

cherone; great for extreme, syphillus for =vh=

[WARF]

That's a very tis-ight letter, Warf. Now all da brothers & sisters know da REAL DEAL about dat fiasco of a reunion. - aww yea foo. Cheers! :bottle:

The Last EUAS member I invited was MAX... that was 5 years ago.... As an original member of EUAS I am now telling Izzy to throw on the tag and join EUAS the true original DLR fan club....

[WARF]

DONNIEP.... you're now EUAS too....
It's time for a roll call motherfuckers!

[DONNIEP]

DONNIEP.... you're now EUAS too....
It's time for a roll call motherfuckers!

An honor I shall not take lightly! Thanks bro!

Where's the women?

[WARF]

I'll tell you after you're wearin' RED bro! It's Eat Us And Smile time!!!!

[Anonymous]

The Last EUAS member I invited was MAX... that was 5 years ago.... As an original member of EUAS I am now telling Izzy to throw on the tag and join EUAS the true original DLR fan club....

Wow... this IS an honour.

Are you sure?

You tried to induct me once, but Pojo was against new members.

I'll gladly accept, if it's all right with everybody.

Cheers! :bottle:

[Igosplut]

Never understood the inter-site club shit. But it does seem that Max got a bad rap at the end. Like to think I gave his a good sendoff.

[WARF]

Wow... this IS an honour.

Are you sure?

You tried to induct me once, but Pojo was against new members.

I'll gladly accept, if it's all right with everybody.

Cheers! :bottle:

Original EUAS members can bring in other members. I did this with MAX without any voting.

[DONNIEP]

This is for real? I thought you were joking.

For once, I don't know what to say.