Will we get a new album from Van Halen?

[Nitro Express]

Mohammad says you can have as much as you like if you kill in my name. Allah! Akbar!

[cadaverdog]

Mohammad says you can have as much as you like if you kill in my name. Allah! Akbar!

It's not Allah Akbar it's Aloha Snackbar. Muslims are big fans of drive in theatres.

[DONNIEP]

It's not Allah Akbar it's Aloha Snackbar. Muslims are big fans of drive in theatres.

Yes but they do not eat ice cream. Frozen food is banned by their religion. Or alcohol. It's hard to remember which.

[Satan]

God made Boobiez. And since JC and God are one in the same, well, he can't be too against Boobiez.

God made boobiez, but I'm the one who told you they were fun!

[cadaverdog]

Yes but they do not eat ice cream. Frozen food is banned by their religion. Or alcohol. It's hard to remember which.

Yeah but Raisinettes and Goobers aren't.

[Satan]

Yes but they do not eat ice cream. Frozen food is banned by their religion. Or alcohol. It's hard to remember which.

Alcohol is banned. Frozen food is merely impractical, since they're in the desert and many of them don't have refrigeration.

It was pretty much the same here in Hell until we got freezers.

[Seshmeister]

Of course as is always the case the people at the top don't follow any of those 'rules', just the plebs they exploit...

[DONNIEP]

Alcohol is banned. Frozen food is merely impractical, since they're in the desert and many of them don't have refrigeration.

No wonder they're so pissed off. Oh well, there's always Dubai.

[DONNIEP]

Of course as is always the case the people at the top don't follow any of those 'rules', just the plebs they exploit...

Oh puh leeze...Southern Baptists aren't supposed to drink either. You think that stops any of us? I mean, sure, you don't want the preacher to see you with a case of cheap beer in your cart at the Walmart but we've learned to be sneaky! Rike the Japanese. Pearr Harbor, that a ritter bit sneaky.

[Satan]

Yes, but how many of you mortals still keep up the pretense with those "dry counties" in the South?

Wanna know what the REAL story was behind "The Devil Went Down To Georgia"?? I wasn't looking for a soul to steal, or to get into a contest with some dumb kid, I was just looking for a goddamned cold beer!!

[DONNIEP]

Yes, but how many of you mortals still keep up the pretense with those "dry counties" in the South?

Wanna know what the REAL story was behind "The Devil Went Down To Georgia"?? I wasn't looking for a soul to steal, or to get into a contest with some dumb kid, I was just looking for a goddamned cold beer!!

I always knew the Devil was a yankee.

Ok, my county is "dry". But the towns can vote to sell booze. My town sells booze. Most of the towns sell booze. So technically it's dry but in reality you can buy all the beer and liquor you want. The reason the "dry counties" still exist is mostly because we don't want to appear to be drankin beer so we can be respectable. So we found a way to look like we're dry but really we got all the booze we can drink. It's just like when teenagers used to go buy from the bootlegger on the weekend. Geez, so much for your all knowing evil powers...

[Anonymous]

I mean, sure, you don't want the preacher to see you with a case of cheap beer in your cart at the Walmart but we've learned to be sneaky!

Religion summed up in a sentence, ladies & gentlemen.

[cadaverdog]

Oh puh leeze...Southern Baptists aren't supposed to drink either.

Booze wasn't a big deal in the church I went to but dancing was. You know why Southern Baptists don't fuck standing up? Because they're afraid someone will see them and think they're dancing.

[DONNIEP]

Religion summed up in a sentence, ladies & gentlemen.

It's the same as it was with Adam and Eve.

[VAiN]

I remember that interview.. It was immediately filed under 'yeah, riiiight'