This just in from ROTHARMY.COM Field Correspondent Bo Nozos.
This pretty much sums up what we have been saying all along... that "Van Hagar Can Eat Our Asses!!!"
BREASTS,
Sarge
Ten Reasons Van Hagar, The Best of Both Worlds disc, and the current tour is a Joke
1. IF YOU'RE A SERIOUS VAN HALEN FAN, EDWARD THINKS YOU "DON'T HAVE A LIFE"
Edward was recently asked by a disc jockey whether he checks out the various Van Halen message boards where hardcore fans have supported Van Halen over the past 5 years of silence. Edward's response? "No, I don't . . . because I have a life."
http://www.vhnd.com/articles/031127-01.shtml
But Edward is surely happy when $375.00 "special access" ticket packages-marketed and sold exclusively through the internet-are bought by those very same fans.
http://www.iloveallaccess.com
2. EDWARD IS SUPPOSED TO BE PLAYING TUBA RIGHT NOW.
"If Gary's in, he's in for life--that's it . . . And if anything ever does happen, then I'll score movies or whatever, but that would be the end of Van Halen . . . I'll take up tuba." - Edward Van Halen
http://www.vhnd.com/archive/press/ew181096.html
3. VAN HALEN DOESN'T DO "GREATEST HITS" TOURS.
" We're not a greatest-hits kind of band. . . . We made great albums and sold out concerts all over the world, and we do not need to rely on the past. . . ." - Sammy Hagar
http://www.vhnd.com/archive/breakup/latimes2.html
" . . . we're not a nostalgia band. I would never just take somebody's money for playing old songs to bring back memories. . . . we'd have to write a new record." - Edward Van Halen
http://www.guitarworld.com/artistindex/9612.eddie.html
4. 14 OF THE 17 TRACKS FROM "BEST OF VOL. I" WILL BE ON "THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS."
No wonder they didn't call the new disc "Best of Vol. II" !!!
5. VAN HALEN THINKS *SAMMY* SINGS THE "BEST" VERSIONS OF "AIN'T TALKIN' 'BOUT LOVE," "JUMP," AND "PANAMA."
"The Best of Both Worlds" includes live version of these three Roth-era classics . . . sung by Sammy. Who are they trying to kid?
6. WHEN YOU BUY A CLASSIC VAN HALEN ALBUM, MICHAEL ANTHONY MAKES MORE MONEY THAN DAVID LEE ROTH.
Several years ago the band re-negotiated their royalty rates and never told Roth. The result, according to Dave:
"If you buy 'Van Halen I' now, if I make 10 cents, the bass player makes 30 cents. And if I make a hundred dollars, the drummer (Alex Van Halen) will make close to three hundred dollars. And I've always maintained since I wrote all the words, and all the lyrics, and all of the harmonies, and structured the tunes, designed most of the album covers-and when MTV happened for everybody, I wrote and directed the videos-with all of that, I should make 25 percent. What do you think?"
http://launch.yahoo.com/read/news.asp?contentID=213567
7. SAMMY HAGAR IS A SALESMAN, NOT A ROCK STAR.
Sam spends more time talking about his tequila than his music.
He has the Cabo Wabo logo tattooed on his arm. This is an advertisement for his liquor and club, no different than if the late Dave Thomas sported a "Wendy's" logo on his bicep.
Sam will sell anything on which he can print "Sammy Hagar" or "Cabo Wabo."
Check out his merch site, where you can buy, among other things, "Limited Edition Sammy Hagar Signature Series Sunglasses," and "Sam-incense" incense:
(For years, Sam sold "Red Rocker Shampoo" and "Red Rocker Conditioner" at this site -- NO JOKE)
No other member of a future Hall of Fame band does this kind of stuff. Oh wait, that's not true . . . .
8. MICHAEL ANTHONY SELLS AUTOGRAPHED BOTTLES OF HOT SAUCE FOR $99.95.
You read that right. Michael Anthony, Van Halen's little-known bassist, yes-man and resident mime, has put out his own line of hot sauce. For a mere $99.95, you too can be the proud owner of an autographed bottle (the bottle sans autograph is a few bucks).
http://www.madanthonycafe.com/hotsau...um_detail.html
9. SAMMY HAS A SERIOUS PROBLEM WITH THE TRUTH . . . HE DOESN'T TELL IT.
On multiple occasions, Sam has bragged to the press that Van Halen sold millions more records with him than it did with Roth:
But in fact, it was recently reported that: "Looking at studio albums by lead singer, Van Halen with David Lee Roth sold 34 million albums. With Sammy Hagar they have sold 16 million"
http://www.undercover.com.au/news/20..._vanhalen.html
Sam says that he was in the band for 11 years, and Roth was in it for 7.
But in fact, real fans know Roth was in Van Halen from approximately 1974 (when the band was founded) to his departure in 1985. That's 11 years, not 7. Sam said in early May that the current tour had already sold out multiple dates:
http://www.contracostatimes.com/mld/...8593222.htm?1c
But in fact, the only confirmed sell out is in Las Vegas and as of early June, there had been no others. Great seats are still available for most shows.
Sam, ever the salesman, is also making a big deal about the current setlist, implying that it's somehow new and improved and includes lots of Roth-era classics: "This set we're playing right now is better than any set we ever played before, because I used to be a little sensitive to the old material.
And I'm not now . . . We have a whole different outlook on everything. The set list will kill you!"
http://www.pennlive.com/music/patrio...6592123130.xml
But in fact, the number of Roth-era classics in the setlist remains low, and are for the most part the same Roth-era songs the band has played on prior tours. And the setlist in general is basically the same one you've heard on prior tours (including the dreaded Michael Anthony bass solo and Hagar's solo acoustic performance of the non-hit "When Eagles Fly," which many fans use as a bathroom and beer-stand break). There is nothing radically improved or different here, even though Sam is saying there is in order to sell more tickets.
And speaking of this so-called "killer" set list . . . .
10. THE BAND CLOSES ITS SHOWS WITH "WHEN IT'S LOVE."
You read that right, too. Speaks for itself. Is there anything more to say?
Yeah, there is, actually. Some reviewers have been noting that Ed, during his solo spot, occasionally throws in a few bars of classic Van Halen songs that fans would love to hear but Hagar can't or won't sing - "Mean Street," "Little Guitars," etc. - and the audience goes insane. The band also at times does a few bars of "Everybody Wants Some," but then launches into something else. In a nutshell this is what the 2004 tour is about: "Mean Street" gets played for 10 seconds, and "When It's Love" is made the high point of
the show.
What other band can't or won't play a number of their real "greatest hits" on a greatest hits tour?
There is something very wrong here.
THIS BAND DOES NOT DESERVE YOUR MONEY OR SUPPORT
DON'T SEE THE CONCERT
DON'T BUY THE "NEW" GREATEST HITS ALBUM
SEND A MESSAGE.
This pretty much sums up what we have been saying all along... that "Van Hagar Can Eat Our Asses!!!"
BREASTS,
Sarge
Ten Reasons Van Hagar, The Best of Both Worlds disc, and the current tour is a Joke

Edward was recently asked by a disc jockey whether he checks out the various Van Halen message boards where hardcore fans have supported Van Halen over the past 5 years of silence. Edward's response? "No, I don't . . . because I have a life."
http://www.vhnd.com/articles/031127-01.shtml
But Edward is surely happy when $375.00 "special access" ticket packages-marketed and sold exclusively through the internet-are bought by those very same fans.
http://www.iloveallaccess.com
2. EDWARD IS SUPPOSED TO BE PLAYING TUBA RIGHT NOW.
"If Gary's in, he's in for life--that's it . . . And if anything ever does happen, then I'll score movies or whatever, but that would be the end of Van Halen . . . I'll take up tuba." - Edward Van Halen
http://www.vhnd.com/archive/press/ew181096.html
3. VAN HALEN DOESN'T DO "GREATEST HITS" TOURS.
" We're not a greatest-hits kind of band. . . . We made great albums and sold out concerts all over the world, and we do not need to rely on the past. . . ." - Sammy Hagar
http://www.vhnd.com/archive/breakup/latimes2.html
" . . . we're not a nostalgia band. I would never just take somebody's money for playing old songs to bring back memories. . . . we'd have to write a new record." - Edward Van Halen
http://www.guitarworld.com/artistindex/9612.eddie.html
4. 14 OF THE 17 TRACKS FROM "BEST OF VOL. I" WILL BE ON "THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS."
No wonder they didn't call the new disc "Best of Vol. II" !!!
5. VAN HALEN THINKS *SAMMY* SINGS THE "BEST" VERSIONS OF "AIN'T TALKIN' 'BOUT LOVE," "JUMP," AND "PANAMA."
"The Best of Both Worlds" includes live version of these three Roth-era classics . . . sung by Sammy. Who are they trying to kid?
6. WHEN YOU BUY A CLASSIC VAN HALEN ALBUM, MICHAEL ANTHONY MAKES MORE MONEY THAN DAVID LEE ROTH.
Several years ago the band re-negotiated their royalty rates and never told Roth. The result, according to Dave:
"If you buy 'Van Halen I' now, if I make 10 cents, the bass player makes 30 cents. And if I make a hundred dollars, the drummer (Alex Van Halen) will make close to three hundred dollars. And I've always maintained since I wrote all the words, and all the lyrics, and all of the harmonies, and structured the tunes, designed most of the album covers-and when MTV happened for everybody, I wrote and directed the videos-with all of that, I should make 25 percent. What do you think?"
http://launch.yahoo.com/read/news.asp?contentID=213567
7. SAMMY HAGAR IS A SALESMAN, NOT A ROCK STAR.
Sam spends more time talking about his tequila than his music.
He has the Cabo Wabo logo tattooed on his arm. This is an advertisement for his liquor and club, no different than if the late Dave Thomas sported a "Wendy's" logo on his bicep.
Sam will sell anything on which he can print "Sammy Hagar" or "Cabo Wabo."
Check out his merch site, where you can buy, among other things, "Limited Edition Sammy Hagar Signature Series Sunglasses," and "Sam-incense" incense:
(For years, Sam sold "Red Rocker Shampoo" and "Red Rocker Conditioner" at this site -- NO JOKE)
No other member of a future Hall of Fame band does this kind of stuff. Oh wait, that's not true . . . .
8. MICHAEL ANTHONY SELLS AUTOGRAPHED BOTTLES OF HOT SAUCE FOR $99.95.
You read that right. Michael Anthony, Van Halen's little-known bassist, yes-man and resident mime, has put out his own line of hot sauce. For a mere $99.95, you too can be the proud owner of an autographed bottle (the bottle sans autograph is a few bucks).
http://www.madanthonycafe.com/hotsau...um_detail.html
9. SAMMY HAS A SERIOUS PROBLEM WITH THE TRUTH . . . HE DOESN'T TELL IT.
On multiple occasions, Sam has bragged to the press that Van Halen sold millions more records with him than it did with Roth:
But in fact, it was recently reported that: "Looking at studio albums by lead singer, Van Halen with David Lee Roth sold 34 million albums. With Sammy Hagar they have sold 16 million"
http://www.undercover.com.au/news/20..._vanhalen.html
Sam says that he was in the band for 11 years, and Roth was in it for 7.
But in fact, real fans know Roth was in Van Halen from approximately 1974 (when the band was founded) to his departure in 1985. That's 11 years, not 7. Sam said in early May that the current tour had already sold out multiple dates:
http://www.contracostatimes.com/mld/...8593222.htm?1c
But in fact, the only confirmed sell out is in Las Vegas and as of early June, there had been no others. Great seats are still available for most shows.
Sam, ever the salesman, is also making a big deal about the current setlist, implying that it's somehow new and improved and includes lots of Roth-era classics: "This set we're playing right now is better than any set we ever played before, because I used to be a little sensitive to the old material.
And I'm not now . . . We have a whole different outlook on everything. The set list will kill you!"
http://www.pennlive.com/music/patrio...6592123130.xml
But in fact, the number of Roth-era classics in the setlist remains low, and are for the most part the same Roth-era songs the band has played on prior tours. And the setlist in general is basically the same one you've heard on prior tours (including the dreaded Michael Anthony bass solo and Hagar's solo acoustic performance of the non-hit "When Eagles Fly," which many fans use as a bathroom and beer-stand break). There is nothing radically improved or different here, even though Sam is saying there is in order to sell more tickets.
And speaking of this so-called "killer" set list . . . .
10. THE BAND CLOSES ITS SHOWS WITH "WHEN IT'S LOVE."
You read that right, too. Speaks for itself. Is there anything more to say?
Yeah, there is, actually. Some reviewers have been noting that Ed, during his solo spot, occasionally throws in a few bars of classic Van Halen songs that fans would love to hear but Hagar can't or won't sing - "Mean Street," "Little Guitars," etc. - and the audience goes insane. The band also at times does a few bars of "Everybody Wants Some," but then launches into something else. In a nutshell this is what the 2004 tour is about: "Mean Street" gets played for 10 seconds, and "When It's Love" is made the high point of
the show.
What other band can't or won't play a number of their real "greatest hits" on a greatest hits tour?
There is something very wrong here.
THIS BAND DOES NOT DESERVE YOUR MONEY OR SUPPORT
DON'T SEE THE CONCERT
DON'T BUY THE "NEW" GREATEST HITS ALBUM
SEND A MESSAGE.
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