R.I.P. The United States of America

[diamondD]

Originally posted by Sgt Schultz
Paranoid Socialists of America
Press Release

The new left wing wacko mantra has officially changed from "Haliburton!" to "Diebold!". Please pass the word to all of your comrades!

LOL!

[ODShowtime]

Originally posted by Ally_Kat
I don't take anything Phil says seriously, either

and I just wait with baited breath for your little nuggets of wisdom.

[Jesus Christ]

Revelation 17
1 And there came one of the seven angels which had the seven vials, and talked with me, saying unto me, Come hither; I will shew unto thee the judgment of the great whore that sitteth upon many waters:
2 With whom the kings of the earth have committed fornication, and the inhabitants of the earth have been made drunk with the wine of her fornication.
3 So he carried me away in the spirit into the wilderness: and I saw a woman sit upon a scarlet coloured beast, full of names of blasphemy, having seven heads and ten horns.
4 And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:
5 And upon her forehead was a name written, MYSTERY, BABYLON THE GREAT, THE MOTHER OF HARLOTS AND ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH.
6 And I saw the woman drunken with the blood of the saints, and with the blood of the martyrs of Jesus: and when I saw her, I wondered with great admiration.
7 And the angel said unto me, Wherefore didst thou marvel? I will tell thee the mystery of the woman, and of the beast that carrieth her, which hath the seven heads and ten horns.
8 The beast that thou sawest was, and is not; and shall ascend out of the bottomless pit, and go into perdition: and they that dwell on the earth shall wonder, whose names were not written in the book of life from the foundation of the world, when they behold the beast that was, and is not, and yet is.
9 And here is the mind which hath wisdom. The seven heads are seven mountains, on which the woman sitteth.
10 And there are seven kings: five are fallen, and one is, and the other is not yet come; and when he cometh, he must continue a short space.
11 And the beast that was, and is not, even he is the eighth, and is of the seven, and goeth into perdition.
12 And the ten horns which thou sawest are ten kings, which have received no kingdom as yet; but receive power as kings one hour with the beast.
13 These have one mind, and shall give their power and strength unto the beast.
14 These shall make war with the Lamb, and the Lamb shall overcome them: for he is Lord of lords, and King of kings: and they that are with him are called, and chosen, and faithful.
15 And he saith unto me, The waters which thou sawest, where the whore sitteth, are peoples, and multitudes, and nations, and tongues.
16 And the ten horns which thou sawest upon the beast, these shall hate the whore, and shall make her desolate and naked, and shall eat her flesh, and burn her with fire.
17 For God hath put in their hearts to fulfil his will, and to agree, and give their kingdom unto the beast, until the words of God shall be fulfilled.
18 And the woman which thou sawest is that great city, which reigneth over the kings of the earth.

[ODShowtime]

what the hell are we gonna do Jesus?

[Sgt Schultz]

Mistranslated Myths Of Nomadic Desert Shepherd Tribe Taken At Face Value

PITTSBURGH, PA--Arcane, poorly translated scrolls etched by an unknown hand thousands of years ago were taken at face value Monday, when Pittsburgh orthodontist Donald Reuss consulted an English translation of a Hebraic manuscript titled "Deuteronomy" for guidance in a personal crisis.

"I was at my wits' end over what to do about my failing marriage," Reuss said. "Marjorie and I thought about counseling, therapy, even divorce. In the end, though, I got the help I needed from a book of stories inscribed by an itinerant Middle Eastern shepherd many millennia ago."

Reuss said he learned of the antediluvian text from a friend following an argument with his wife. "Bob said he had a book that I should read," Reuss said. "I figured it would be some sort of self-help book written by one of those professional therapists born in the latter half of the 20th century. But to my surprise, it was a contemporary printing of a historical and genealogical account of the growth and persecution of the Jewish people, originally written in ancient Hebrew. And you know what? Not only were the tales relevant to my situation, they're completely true!"

Deuteronomy, like the four other books with which it is often collected, is believed to have originated from the oral folklore of nomadic Jews who wandered the deserts of the Middle East. The stories that emerged from this oral tradition were handed down through subsequent generations and ultimately written down in now-dead tongues. In the modern era, the books have proven to be of great interest both to historians specializing in ancient Middle Eastern tribal cultures and to people with problems.

Reuss is not the only troubled American to consult an ancient Nile Valley manuscript in recent years. In April 1998, Wayzata, MN, homemaker Brenda Smolensk credited "Exodus" with guiding her through a period of severe depression.

"I was deeply confused about my place in the world," Smolensk said. "I needed to know what life was all about, what I was put on Earth for. Luckily, that exact matter had been discussed in Exodus by a roving scribe some 4,000 years ago."

"At first, I was skeptical about what relevance these ancient writings could possibly have to my situation," Smolensk continued. "But they actually deal with all kinds of germane topics, from what meats one should not eat due to mankind's lack of refrigeration technology to the pre-Iron Age accounts of territorial disputes affecting a certain area of the Fertile Crescent."

"We are pleased that so many have found comfort and guidance in God's word," said Peter Wanamaker, president and founder of In His Name Books, a publishing house specializing in archaic texts of the sort which aided Reuss and Smolensk. "The problems that plague modern man have not changed, and neither have the solutions."

© Copyright 2000 Onion, Inc., All rights reserved.

[Ally_Kat]

Originally posted by ODShowtime
and I just wait with baited breath for your little nuggets of wisdom.

Dude, you do realize I'm kidding around with you...right?

[Switch84]

What the fuck???

Anyway, I don't want to argue this all day. I'm depressed about this result and I'm here to talk music...not fight with people over an election that's already over. [/B][/QUOTE]


Rikk, ease the seat back and step away from your PC! This election doesn't concern you. This is an American election and Americans voted and President Bush won! No offense, Baby, but this is none of your business! The world doesn't pick our leaders...WE (UNITED STATES citizens) do!

If Kerry had of won, then maybe that would've changed since he was so quick to bend over for world approval of AMERICAN issues, that lily-livered rat bastard! I'm estatic he lost; now he can revert to normal by being non-existent and half-ass voting in congress.

GOOOOOOOO DUBYA!!!!!!

[Fabulous Shadow]

Re: What the fuck???

Originally posted by Switch84
Anyway, I don't want to argue this all day. I'm depressed about this result and I'm here to talk music...not fight with people over an election that's already over.

Rikk, ease the seat back and step away from your PC! This election doesn't concern you. This is an American election and Americans voted and President Bush won! No offense, Baby, but this is none of your business! The world doesn't pick our leaders...WE (UNITED STATES citizens) do!

If Kerry had of won, then maybe that would've changed since he was so quick to bend over for world approval of AMERICAN issues, that lily-livered rat bastard! I'm estatic he lost; now he can revert to normal by being non-existent and half-ass voting in congress.

GOOOOOOOO DUBYA!!!!!! [/B][/QUOTE]

Switch, we disagree on many things, but that was a great post!

[Switch84]

Re: Re: What the fuck???

Originally posted by Fabulous Shadow
[BSwitch, we disagree on many things, but that was a great post! [/B]

I'm all about keeping it real, and when I see posts by foreigners whining and bitching about AMERICAN issues, THAT'S A NO-GO IN MY BOOK! I can't elect the Prime Minister of Great Britian, so why bitch? These non-citizens just need to shut the fuck up.

[Fabulous Shadow]

Props Switch!

[ODShowtime]

Originally posted by McCarrens
However, you suck OD, and know nothing about politics.

shut the fuck up while I'm talking to bonzo you mealy-mouth piece of shit

[wraytw]

Originally posted by ODShowtime
shut the fuck up while I'm talking to bonzo you mealy-mouth piece of shit

How's that for nuggets of wisdom?

[Hecubus]

God damn....

Some of you folks shouldn't take the Bible....a book that was written HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO, nay THOUSANDS...so fucking literally.

Some of that stuff's pretty outdated. Times change. The world has advanced past most of that stuff....I guess the bible belt hasn't tho.

Anybody want to talk stem cell research?

[aesop]

...But ignorance and apathy are not bound by time.

[Seshmeister]

Originally posted by Hecubus


Anybody want to talk stem cell research?

People have an inherent survival instinct.

When they see that people in Europe are surviving conditions that their parents are dying of suddenly they'll be able to rationalise it within Christianity. If they can rationalise bombing people they'll manage that.

Just like the way they pardoned Galileo for saying the Earth went around the Sun. It just takes them a while...