VH Chart, Ticket Sales, Tour Success - NOT!

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  • guwapo_rocker

    Forgive me if this has been posted.

    Washington Times review.

    The reformulated Van Halen passed its first test Friday night when Eddie Van Halen emerged shirtless on stage at the MCI Center looking as healthy as a rock deity possibly could. The stamina of his self-named band, though, is another matter.
    The mid-era Van Halen — with singer Sammy Hagar in the mix instead of David Lee Roth — reunited this year to crank out a forthcoming greatest hits album along with a few new songs to show they aren't an oldies act just yet.
    Never mind major grievances between singer and band, it's either now or never for Van Halen to reclaim its mantle.
    Trouble is, that mantle may no longer be available for the retaking.
    Times change, and today's listeners wanna hear Jet, The Strokes and other oh, so 2004 music.
    Still, the group's District visit showed the quartet still has the rock chops, particularly Eddie Van Halen. The guitarist jumped, ran and danced across the stage like a man half his age, casting aside his hip replacement surgery and tongue cancer battles. More importantly, he can still coax just about any sound he chooses out of his given instrument.
    The band kicked the time machine into gear with "Jump," a classic from the David Lee Roth era. Today, Mr. Hagar doesn't mind dipping back into the Van Halen catalog a time or two, as if formally declaring all hard feelings over and done with.
    That doesn't mean his version was superior to Diamond Dave's, at least in its live incarnation. More shriek than song, the number proved a fairly accurate overview of the entire concert: loud, fuzzy and never coalescing into the kind of sound four gifted musicians should produce.
    Either the band needs a few more road gigs to slip back into old form or the songs aren't holding up as proudly as they hoped.
    The hits took up the bulk of the show, from "Unchained" to "Round and Round" and "Why Can't This Be Love," each with enough hook left to keep fans roaring.
    Mr. Hagar, never a showman like Mr. Roth in his prime, makes do with boxing moves and jerky twirls. He's got beach-bum charisma to burn, however — which may explain why he kept informing the crowd he was "on the beach."
    Clad in a mustard yellow ensemble, the stocky singer looked like a WWE character ready to pounce into the crowd and bring the party to them. He pulled out every trick in his stage arsenal, from tying a brassiere to the mike stand to wearing whatever was thrown his way.
    Doesn't the Red Rocker know modern rock stars are supposed to be indifferent to their fans?
    The group did throw a surprise political punch during their haunting ballad, "Right Now." You don't have to be twentysomething to have a chip on your shoulder about the Bush administration, apparently. The song also featured another stab at today's marketplace, with a huge video monitor flashing "Right now, a 13-year-old is illegally downloading this song."
    That video screen brought a sense of intimacy to the not-quite-sold-out affair. The monitor helped cheap-seaters see the bond between Eddie Van Halen and guest guitarist Wolfgang Van Halen as father and son played together during the guitarist's lengthy showcase.
    After Alex Van Halen's ubiquitous and tedious solo set, the monitor zoomed in on his face. The smile that beamed throughout the arena let fans know the band was as happy to be back on stage as the crowd was to see them once more, flaws and all.
    Opening act Silvertide delivered a respectable pastiche of rock moves and chords until lead singer Walt Lafty began berating the crowd for remaining in their seats.
    Rock stat lesson one: let the music do the motivating for you, Mr. Lafty.

    Comment

    • Cathedral
      ROTH ARMY ELITE
      • Jan 2004
      • 6621

      Originally posted by FORD
      Now why would that be the case when Sammy is a raging Busheep Republican
      Whatever, Spammy is still a flacid chubby...

      Comment

      • Big Troubles
        ROTH ARMY SUPREME
        • Feb 2004
        • 8517

        Roth has famously compared the Hagar-fronted version of the band to "a beautiful chick with bad teeth."

        I will keep posting this. I love it!
        "FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKIN' BITCH! WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ANYWAYS? TALK TO ME LIKE THAT? FUCK YOU. DRAG QUEEN LOOKIN' WHORE- YOU AINT SHIT. YOUR THE FRECKLE TO THE LEFT OF MY BROWN EYE. NOW GO MAKE YOURSELF USEFUL...OH, PUT DAD ON THE PHONE"

        Comment

        • Samsonite
          Head Fluffer
          • May 2004
          • 221

          Well...they did have a sellout

          Comment

          • pete
            Crazy Ass Mofo
            • Jan 2004
            • 3325

            Originally posted by Samsonite
            Well...they did have a sellout
            that began long ago.

            Comment

            • Samsonite
              Head Fluffer
              • May 2004
              • 221

              How long have you been waiting to bust out that gem?

              Comment

              • pete
                Crazy Ass Mofo
                • Jan 2004
                • 3325

                don't be a dick.

                all you have to do is here 5150, and the dramatic shift in style to realize how much DLR affected the music.

                He didn't just sing.

                or scream if you like sammy.

                Comment

                • pete
                  Crazy Ass Mofo
                  • Jan 2004
                  • 3325

                  it took a fleet of designers and consulting firms to replace DLR, BADLY.

                  SAMsonite..

                  fuck.

                  I'm wasting my breathe.

                  Comment

                  • vanhalendlrband
                    Groupie
                    • Jan 2004
                    • 97

                    I saw dave in Vancouver and he sounded as good if not better than the original Van Halen albums. It was a fuckin wicked show!
                    Van Halen with Dave would still be so much bigger than Sammy straight up, and Sam's voice isn't sounding to great either if you've heard those tracks, he tries to hit notes that he just can't hit.

                    When it comes down to it, Sammy would rather sellout with Van Halen than play "heavy metal". The song Heavy Metal isn't even Heavy Metal anyways so go figure Sammy Fagar.

                    Its About Time is already falling off the charts, it hit #6 last week and is now down to #7. Me Wise Magic was #1, and why was that? Cuz one it was fuckin a way better song, it soundes like an amazing Van Halen track, Its About Time is a weak attempt to sound cool first but then they sellout again. And Up For Breakfast, i can't even sit throught, Learning To See is another attempt to crack into the "Aerosmith" market. The beginning actually sounds ok even tho its cheeze but then when it gets heavy it seems way too off. Not only that Warner won't even put Van Fagar on there main label, they get the Rhino. Van Halen starting to die? With Sam, they'll be forgotten about way sooner than they would've been with dave.
                    When you think of Van Halen you think of David Lee Roth.

                    Comment

                    • Cathedral
                      ROTH ARMY ELITE
                      • Jan 2004
                      • 6621

                      Van Who?

                      Comment

                      • gslinger
                        Foot Soldier
                        • May 2004
                        • 729

                        Tour Update - Part I: 6/28/04

                        ……..Well Wolfgang has become a permanent member of the newly renamed Van Partridge Family Tour, doing every show now. Val’s still hanging in with the Tour also. Way to go Val!...... (yeah I’ve got new pics of her...keep your pants up Ok). I think we have seen enough pics of Wolfie, although I do have several more choice ones to post in “The Secret Life of Wolfgang” thread.

                        I have notices Michael’s teenage daughter Elicha Anthony has also been on the VPF Tour for the last 4-5 shows. Anything to hawk those ticket folks!!!!.......and hey she is pretty cute. Lately, her job has been to come out from time to time during the show and pass out drinks to Spammy and Michael (S&M).

                        I guess CCC made Spammy get rid of the paid hookers he usually has passing out and peddling his booze, to cut down on overhead, since CCC is still losing money on this Tour. More details later on that subject with full accounting numbers (you didn’t think I was going to let you down did ya, haaaaa)…………

                        Anyway, the last 3 shows S&M seem to be having an on-stage contest, to see who can get drunker that Eddie V. Kind of like a new form of “WWF 2-on-1 Summer SlamDown”. S&M have been getting so shit-face drunk on stage that even Eddie V has said he doesn’t want any part of it. Then EVH goes back to his corner and slams down his customary 2 - 4 bottles of wine, a pack of smokes, and a nice handful of “little helpers” per show. My, how the wholesome Partridge family image has changed over the years!

                        I’m not going to give Michael any grief since our birthdays are only 3 days apart, and us medusa minded Gemini’s have to stick together. Besides, the Van Halen sister’s screw Michael on the money as bad as they screwed Dave. Michael just always would take the abuse, where Diamond would not!

                        Bass players always get screwed on the money, and I don’t care what anyone says, Michael is still a damn solid musician. Besides, he has a number of awesome vintage cars, that I will definitely give him some extra credit and consideration for! Anyway, here’s a couple of pics of Elicha and Pops, and I/we will post more later when time permits.…gs


                        More Tour Update News to come……………
                        <center>Accept Only Van <strike>Halen</strike> Roth Classic!
                        "Everyday becomes a better Diamond Dave day"</center><center>http://img11.imageshack.us/img11/6002/03Way.jpg
                        </center><marquee><b><font color=Blue><size=+4>The 2004 Spammy “Eat It & Puke” Van ReHash Tour * Coming to a "This Suit is You" Store In Your Tiny Little Neighborhood. Brought to you by the Hemlock Society, Underground Bulemics United, PUTR - People for the Unethical Treatment of Rockfans, & a Special Message from Eddie & Alex Van Halen - Fuck you guyssss!!!!! </size></font></b></marquee></font>
                        <center>
                        "Those cats had me so beat down & confused, made the cancer seem like a tiny zit on my ass..I don't have a clue what's going on"-EVH</center>
                        <center>Click>"Hot Chicks for Dave" & "Dave’s Cavalcade of Bimbos"</center>

                        Comment

                        • gslinger
                          Foot Soldier
                          • May 2004
                          • 729

                          “I look better than Roth, seeeeee - like Diamond always said, “It’s not whether you win or lose the game but how goodddd youuuu lookkk!…….sides haven’t ya hear, I’m back, I’m black, and I’m chasing white meat! – EVH 6/04 ”

                          ”Hey guys, you did pay full price for your tickets didn't ya”???



                          Van ReHash Tour, Washington DC, 6/25/04
                          <center>Accept Only Van <strike>Halen</strike> Roth Classic!
                          "Everyday becomes a better Diamond Dave day"</center><center>http://img11.imageshack.us/img11/6002/03Way.jpg
                          </center><marquee><b><font color=Blue><size=+4>The 2004 Spammy “Eat It & Puke” Van ReHash Tour * Coming to a "This Suit is You" Store In Your Tiny Little Neighborhood. Brought to you by the Hemlock Society, Underground Bulemics United, PUTR - People for the Unethical Treatment of Rockfans, & a Special Message from Eddie & Alex Van Halen - Fuck you guyssss!!!!! </size></font></b></marquee></font>
                          <center>
                          "Those cats had me so beat down & confused, made the cancer seem like a tiny zit on my ass..I don't have a clue what's going on"-EVH</center>
                          <center>Click>"Hot Chicks for Dave" & "Dave’s Cavalcade of Bimbos"</center>

                          Comment

                          • DavidLeeNatra
                            TOASTMASTER GENERAL
                            • Jan 2004
                            • 10715

                            Originally posted by gslinger
                            ”Hey guys, you did pay full price for your tickets didn't ya”???

                            Van ReHash Tour, Washington DC, 6/25/04
                            :D
                            Roth Army Icon
                            First official owner of ADKOT (Deluxe Version)

                            Comment

                            • gslinger
                              Foot Soldier
                              • May 2004
                              • 729

                              Shiteeeeeeee, where’s all the fans…….the show was suppose to start 45 minutes ago and dammitt I’m already out of wine!!!!!!!! - EVH
                              <center>Accept Only Van <strike>Halen</strike> Roth Classic!
                              "Everyday becomes a better Diamond Dave day"</center><center>http://img11.imageshack.us/img11/6002/03Way.jpg
                              </center><marquee><b><font color=Blue><size=+4>The 2004 Spammy “Eat It & Puke” Van ReHash Tour * Coming to a "This Suit is You" Store In Your Tiny Little Neighborhood. Brought to you by the Hemlock Society, Underground Bulemics United, PUTR - People for the Unethical Treatment of Rockfans, & a Special Message from Eddie & Alex Van Halen - Fuck you guyssss!!!!! </size></font></b></marquee></font>
                              <center>
                              "Those cats had me so beat down & confused, made the cancer seem like a tiny zit on my ass..I don't have a clue what's going on"-EVH</center>
                              <center>Click>"Hot Chicks for Dave" & "Dave’s Cavalcade of Bimbos"</center>

                              Comment

                              • gslinger
                                Foot Soldier
                                • May 2004
                                • 729

                                Originally posted by DavidLeeNatra
                                :D

                                Stage Front VH Tickets: - $20 to $90

                                If your’re a VHLinks sucker: $175 to $525

                                I say
                                Priceless!



                                --------

                                In David Lee Washington We Trust
                                <center>Accept Only Van <strike>Halen</strike> Roth Classic!
                                "Everyday becomes a better Diamond Dave day"</center><center>http://img11.imageshack.us/img11/6002/03Way.jpg
                                </center><marquee><b><font color=Blue><size=+4>The 2004 Spammy “Eat It & Puke” Van ReHash Tour * Coming to a "This Suit is You" Store In Your Tiny Little Neighborhood. Brought to you by the Hemlock Society, Underground Bulemics United, PUTR - People for the Unethical Treatment of Rockfans, & a Special Message from Eddie & Alex Van Halen - Fuck you guyssss!!!!! </size></font></b></marquee></font>
                                <center>
                                "Those cats had me so beat down & confused, made the cancer seem like a tiny zit on my ass..I don't have a clue what's going on"-EVH</center>
                                <center>Click>"Hot Chicks for Dave" & "Dave’s Cavalcade of Bimbos"</center>

                                Comment

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